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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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So what you're saying is, we need to get you to 2K.
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Craig Schaefer@craigschaefer.bsky.social |
205 followers 110 following 844 posts
Writes books, mostly about magic and outlaws. Pen name of Heather Schaefer. Making my nest in Providence. My latest, Dig Two Graves, is available now. (www.amazon.com/dp/B0D1HDPH4H)
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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So what you're saying is, we need to get you to 2K.
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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Also: "The movies aren't misogynist, Art is!" Okay, well, did Art decide to show us extensive scenes of women being graphically tortured to death and mutilated with slurs being carved into their bodies? Because he's a fictional character, actual humans made that choice
0 replies 0 reposts 3 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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Yeah, just reminded myself that I'm not getting into political arguments here. "What you really mean is--" No, I know what I really mean and you don't, because you aren't me. Bye, blocked, done.
1 replies 0 reposts 5 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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In case anyone needs to hear this (because I did), yes, the world is burning. You are not Betraying The Cause by finding solace in stupid tv shows or video games or anything else that means nothing but makes you happy. If it gets you through and keeps you on your feet, there's the value, right there
4 replies 55 reposts 153 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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Once, at a cocktail party. Sigh.
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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Oh good, it's not just me.
1 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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Wait a second, that means she wasn't ANYWHERE in our world! I call shenanigans!
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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I saw a recent article about how WotC is wrestling with how to teach D&D as opposed to just cramming books with rules and hoping you know someone who already learned how to play from someone else, and like... y'all. That problem was solved in 1983. Learn from the past.
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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I guess that's why it's called art, not...easy? It's early, I got nothin'.
0 replies 0 reposts 7 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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Fun thing about being a working artist is waking up before dawn with nightmares about Project 2025 making it impossible for you to earn a living and eventually taking your life, and having to push that aside and find a way to write things that give hope to other people in the exact same boat.
2 replies 0 reposts 10 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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100% this. B/X is still a great game and super-easy to learn and play. AD&D 1st ed? "Here, have two pages of polearm statistics and a psionics system completely divorced from the already-existing magic system. And weapon speed, can't forget the all-important weapon speed rules."
1 replies 0 reposts 3 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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This is fucking deranged behavior. Like, bad enough to be like this in the first place, what person with a functioning brain goes "I'm sure the author will be fine with this and change the cover just for me! I mean, if I politely explain that I'm racist, how could it be a problem?"
0 replies 0 reposts 3 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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I'm a rebel who doesn't follow the rules, and that's why it's Taco Monday.
1 replies 0 reposts 5 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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Begging a reporter, any reporter, to ask Nigel, "Since you clearly love it so much, could you tell us what happens at the end of the movie?"
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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And with it comes the eternal challenge of all Soulslikes: "Get good...at that ass."
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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Here's a brutal reminder of the fact that you're anti-American quislings who are actively pushing for Project 2025, and will be put up against a wall someday, the fate you've richly earned.
0 replies 0 reposts 5 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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Some days writing is full of excitement and romance and action scenes, and some days you spend two hours studying the 15th century etymology of a word just to get it right. This is an etymology day.
1 replies 0 reposts 12 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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Predicting right now that Egg Dad, when he inevitably manifests, is going to turn out to be into some deeply weird shit
1 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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Happy birthday!
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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The Overlook Hotel has seen much better days
0 replies 0 reposts 6 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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Jesus, this. As a survivor of abuse who has written about it through a fictional lens as a form of processing and hopefully helping others to heal, hearing people jump on that train just makes me feel fucking GREAT
1 replies 1 reposts 11 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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Goddamnit. I'm so sorry; I hope something comes up before it's too late.
1 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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Truer words seldom said.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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Would never dream of scoffing, Elmore Leonard is literally one of the reasons I'm a writer today. Absolute master, and his ear for dialogue is impeccable.
1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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Can definitely see him walking into a diner saying, "All right, boys...what's all the hoopla?"
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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No idea, but over the last two days I've been followed by the exact same pornbot using ten different accounts/names so some weird bot activity is definitely happening here
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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This is exactly what I needed, thank you
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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Every now and then I see a discussion about cops between people who have never actually interacted with the law and learned everything they know from Law and Order episodes and goddamn, IT SHOWS
1 replies 1 reposts 7 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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Not enough shit can be shoveled on Dick Wolf's head for the decades he's spent mythologizing our entire justice system. Cops are righteous and good and humble protectors! The system is fair and honest! Rights are for guilty people, good people can and should cooperate with authority!
2 replies 5 reposts 20 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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"Do you have probable cause?" "Uh, what? Dude, we don't even investigate crimes that are REPORTED to us, so why would we have that? This isn't like a TV show where cops actually do their jobs."
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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Sounds like a load of drek to me, by the fifth moon and Fanganoth's gubblies.
1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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No lies detected.
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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That dude was literally the fastest block I've ever clicked on this platform. If it's a bit, he's not fucking funny and should read the room.
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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Willow did NOT come to play tonight
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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Still one of the best zombie movies ever made, hilarious while serving up absolute nightmare fuel at the same time.
1 replies 1 reposts 7 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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The greatest civilizations in history have had firm taboos against stealing from the dead. Tech bros: "Yeah, but...MINE. Because GIMME."
1 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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Ah, the new-game dilemma. Play Zenless Zone Zero for a little bit when it drops at 10PM my time tonight and try to get some sleep after, or wait until after work tomorrow?
1 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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"I understand you've been disparaging NaNoWriMo." "What?! How did you even get into my house?" "Enforcing the codes of conduct." "I'm in the SHOWER!" "Codes of conduct."
1 replies 0 reposts 5 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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They're nothing but puffed-up confederates, and we've been here before. We know what to do with confederates. This isn't going to go the way they think it will.
0 replies 0 reposts 5 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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All I know is "Excuse me, do you know where I can find some sailors?"
1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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Your honor, with all due respect, this ain't a scene, it's a goddamn arms race.
0 replies 0 reposts 16 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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JK's not like the other writers, here, in the trailer park
0 replies 0 reposts 9 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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This was a great read, thanks for sharing it!
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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Every transphobe I've had the misfortune to run across has hurled the 'crossdressing' accusation at me and it's just the weirdest goddamn thing. Like, I have kinks. Several kinks. That is...not remotely one of them? My clothes are just...my clothes. They have no sexual qualities. At all.
2 replies 0 reposts 10 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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And remember this, when you're feeling down about this hellscape we share: the revolutionaries WON. We can win again. We will win again. No kings in America.
0 replies 0 reposts 10 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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Thanks for the reminder! I was holding off until it left early access, so I could play it from start to finish, and it is definitely time.
1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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100%. Subnautica is incredible. Genuinely the most terrifying game I've ever played, the fear is palpable and relentless.
1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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I write novels about queer outlaws who do crimes, and even though it's my fantasy too, sometimes I have to take a moment to breathe in the landscape and realize how truly appealing that is. More queer, more crimes, check, noted. Uh, also in my books. Also that. That's what I meant, totally.
0 replies 0 reposts 17 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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Legally, he could feed them into a woodchipper. I'm certainly not endorsing or suggesting this, just saying, it's an option that they have made explicitly legal so long as he says it's for the sake of national security. Which it would be. Arguably. I am not a lawyer.
1 replies 0 reposts 5 likes
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Craig Schaefer
@craigschaefer.bsky.social
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Yikes, yeah. I'm glad I saw it -- once -- because it's visually striking, but I did not enjoy the experience and would not recommend it to anyone else.
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes