EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️

EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 07, 2024 at 22:29 UTC

We appreciate a good dad joke. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 06, 2024 at 23:06 UTC

Shoutout to engineer Tim who retired today. 25 yrs of screeching modems cost Tim his hearing & his sobriety, but he showed up every day. Earthlink’s push toward DSL broke him. Tim’s a beautiful soul in a world that moves too fast.

2 replies 4 reposts 12 likes

EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 06, 2024 at 07:41 UTC

Thank you Becca. We also offer streaming with extensive buffering so you can catch up on house chores and family time.

1 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 06, 2024 at 01:56 UTC

Current events have forced us to abandon our new marketing campaign: “Life begins at EarthLink”™️ 🚩 We will temporarily return to our old slogan: “EarthLink, The Right Lane of the Information Highway”

1 replies 4 reposts 9 likes

EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 05:33 UTC

Early fireworks tonight at EarthLink 🎉 Someone replaced Janice’s Kombucha with diet Yoohoo and she was chill until she noticed Karl looked buzzed and reeked of vinegar and she hit him with a skull crusher move she’d learned at Zumba.

0 replies 6 reposts 8 likes

EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 01, 2024 at 23:54 UTC

Sorry everyone who signed the new user agreement without reading it. You owe us $5,000

0 replies 4 reposts 10 likes

EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 30, 2024 at 21:15 UTC

We’ve already begun stripping the asbestos out of the break room and tossing it into the river🇺🇸

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EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 30, 2024 at 21:13 UTC

We apologize to everyone whose recent call center experience was terrifying. Carol has been taking scream therapy.

0 replies 4 reposts 13 likes

EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 30, 2024 at 02:03 UTC

What’s your hurry? EarthLink gives you time to chill and appreciate your surroundings.

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 30, 2024 at 02:03 UTC

OSHA says we can no long barbecue in the break room. There goes S’mores Saturdays.

2 replies 3 reposts 9 likes

EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 27, 2024 at 22:16 UTC

Carol is getting flooded with complaints about the late start for the debate. We understand many of you are in bed by 8:30. EarthLink provides lightning fast dialup, but we cannot bend space and time.

1 replies 4 reposts 6 likes

EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 25, 2024 at 01:40 UTC

Join EarthLink on Thursday for Debate ‘24! Karl and Janice will discuss the pros and cons of keeping that landline in your bathroom vs the cost savings of our bundled jitterbug phone/Better Homes and Gardens subscription deal.

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EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 23, 2024 at 01:24 UTC

It’s in beta.

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EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 23, 2024 at 01:18 UTC

EarthLink is a different kind of internet company. We’re the only DSL provider that accepts Diners Club, Carte Blanche, and bags of quarters.

1 replies 6 reposts 14 likes

EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 22, 2024 at 10:35 UTC

We’re letting her work on pain meds. Carol’s doing better than most of us.

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EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 22, 2024 at 10:33 UTC

None. Any EarthLink customer who attempts to use graphics or attachments in an email, violates the user agreement. Most of our customers are in bed by 8. 32 bit is already overkill for us.

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 22, 2024 at 01:29 UTC

It’s hot! At EarthLink, we’re committed to keeping costs down, but most of our budget goes to air condition the server, and we still need to build a ramp for Carol after she broke her leg tripping over the beach chairs next to the server.

2 replies 4 reposts 13 likes

EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 15, 2024 at 23:44 UTC

Please space out your calls on Father’s Day. If everyone tries to get their dad at the prime 4:30 pm hour between naptime and dinner, our server will overload again. Thank you for your consideration. EarthLink

0 replies 5 reposts 17 likes

EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 12, 2024 at 01:25 UTC

Thank you for your consideration. We call it bawdy rate because some of consumers complained that it was too low to stream porn.

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EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 11, 2024 at 03:38 UTC

Reminder that our 24/7 service line isn’t there to answer questions about whether you can kill a shark with a battery.

1 replies 4 reposts 9 likes

EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 08, 2024 at 05:09 UTC

We’re sorry. Earthlink doesn’t offer introductory prices. Most of our customers don’t outlive their contracts.

0 replies 6 reposts 18 likes

EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 08, 2024 at 00:18 UTC

EarthLink is down for regularly scheduled maintenance. Some of you should do the same.

0 replies 4 reposts 9 likes

EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 01, 2024 at 20:50 UTC

Big news! We still can’t pay employees overtime, but there’s Kit Kat bars in the vending machine.

1 replies 4 reposts 18 likes

EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] May 31, 2024 at 22:24 UTC

𝙁𝙊𝙍 𝙄𝙈𝙈𝙀𝘿𝙄𝘼𝙏𝙀 𝙍𝙀𝙇𝙀𝘼𝙎𝙀: EarthLink safety protocols protect our seniors from convicted ex presidents begging for money. Our server can’t handle all those graphics.

0 replies 8 reposts 27 likes

EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] May 30, 2024 at 23:41 UTC

Right now, some of our older clients are smashing their modems. You will not get back your deposits!

1 replies 11 reposts 31 likes

EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] May 26, 2024 at 00:10 UTC

At EarthLink, we accentuate the positive. We couldn’t pay our air conditioning again, so our Memorial Day Weekend crew is grilling hotdogs on our server while it overheats.

0 replies 10 reposts 24 likes

EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] May 13, 2024 at 22:25 UTC

We’re sorry we blamed our weekend outages on solar flares. Carol needed an outlet for her blue light therapy lamp and unplugged the server again.

1 replies 4 reposts 20 likes

EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] May 04, 2024 at 22:34 UTC

PR says we have to stop calling them “outages” and refer to them as “family time opportunities.” El Centro, Ehrenberg, and Desert Center, please enjoy family time until we get our 4X4 smog checked.

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EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] May 02, 2024 at 22:40 UTC

This does not align with our corporate values but damn

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EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Apr 30, 2024 at 22:22 UTC

Focus Group Highlights: •Why does the modem make that horrible sound? •The customer rep was vaping. •Your slogan makes me uncomfortable. •There’s still an EarthLink? “𝘾𝙝𝙖𝙣𝙜𝙚 𝙞𝙨 𝙨𝙡𝙤𝙬, 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙨𝙤 𝙞𝙨 𝙀𝙖𝙧𝙩𝙝𝙇𝙞𝙣𝙠”™️

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EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Apr 28, 2024 at 20:09 UTC

Karl won’t give anyone the server password (it’s Modem69)

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EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Apr 28, 2024 at 18:55 UTC

**EARTHLINK SERVICE ALERT*** •We apologize for systemwide outages. •Karl dropped his Slurpee in the server. •He’ll get on repairs as soon as he returns with a new Slurpee.

1 replies 6 reposts 26 likes

EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Apr 27, 2024 at 22:33 UTC

May you be so rich, your widow’s husband has to never work a day.

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EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Apr 27, 2024 at 22:32 UTC

Someone keeps stealing IT tech Janice’s lunch and she's chained herself to the breakroom fridge. Expect service interruptions until we pry Janice loose.

0 replies 4 reposts 17 likes

EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Apr 21, 2024 at 02:17 UTC

EarthLink is proud of our diversity. Karl in engineering can curse in 4 languages.

1 replies 3 reposts 7 likes

EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Apr 20, 2024 at 03:05 UTC

Customer service rep Carol’s been reinstated after completing anger management training and promising not to confuse her Zoloft with her Tic Tacs.

0 replies 2 reposts 6 likes

EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Apr 17, 2024 at 02:20 UTC

Some of you young folk have complained about Earthlink’s service. We serviced your moms for years and they didn’t complain.

1 replies 7 reposts 13 likes

EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Apr 16, 2024 at 01:52 UTC

Fast, reliable, generally secure™️

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EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Apr 16, 2024 at 01:51 UTC

If you’re filing your taxes electronically with EarthLink’s lightning fast dialup, please allow extra time. Our server is making weird noises.

0 replies 3 reposts 5 likes

EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Apr 11, 2024 at 22:24 UTC

We apologize for the delayed acknowledgment and thanks but it took 25 minutes to download this skeet.

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Apr 11, 2024 at 21:54 UTC

You’re in her DM’s swapping nudes. We don’t have the bandwidth to send photos. We’re not the same.

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EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Apr 02, 2024 at 20:41 UTC

EarthLink dialup customers have shown a surge of interest in “apps.” Apps are for children. Grow up.

0 replies 3 reposts 7 likes

EarthLink Dialup (We’re Still Here) ☎️ @earthlinkfan.bsky.social [ View ] Mar 31, 2024 at 02:42 UTC

EarthLink customer service is available Monday thru Friday 9A-4P CST except 10-11 Thursday mornings when Carol attends anger management classes.

0 replies 3 reposts 6 likes