Brandon

Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 27, 2024 at 21:15 UTC

First day of 1st Grade: “Ya’ll kids need to stop thinking about fucking your neighbor’s wife”, it’s a commandment from God

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 24, 2024 at 23:20 UTC

It was designed for smokers and nerds. Bonus points if you were both

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 24, 2024 at 22:08 UTC

I like how all these shitty old white dudes wanna out-trump, Trump. Lol

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 20, 2024 at 18:14 UTC

I was wondering why those game devs were following me around

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 08, 2024 at 19:47 UTC

I caught my son playing Alien Poop Simulator and he gave himself a time out.

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] May 30, 2024 at 00:53 UTC

The classics never go out of style

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] May 28, 2024 at 20:13 UTC

Just replace him with a new pope that is into gay stuff

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] May 20, 2024 at 22:43 UTC

lol I just remember buying the original XBOX and getting that monstrosity, then seeing in game mags how much sleeker the controller-s looked

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] May 20, 2024 at 17:30 UTC

The Japanese XBOX came with the much smaller controller-s, which then came over to the west when MS realized how ridiculous the duke was

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] May 10, 2024 at 13:18 UTC

Just being more transparent about the layoffs would have helped tremendously. Retain key talent from Arkane Austin and downsize to 1 studio in Lyon. Talk about how diluted the Austin studio became after key members left after Prey. Just dumb the way they approached this.

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] May 06, 2024 at 21:12 UTC

Goddammit, Israel

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] Apr 22, 2024 at 23:21 UTC

Sole purchaser of Gamescent

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] Apr 21, 2024 at 23:04 UTC

I mean, he owns the team. At least he has a legit reason to be there

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] Apr 17, 2024 at 14:37 UTC

He’s so not a tough guy either, so it makes his incitement all the more ridiculous. Like if Marjory Taylor Green said this, I could believe that her crazy ass might run over protestors herself. Cotton would just turn his car around and go the McDonald’s drive-thru to get a McFlurry

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] Apr 15, 2024 at 18:18 UTC

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] Apr 13, 2024 at 00:32 UTC

You only get points for wearing high-heals and running for President if you don’t try to hide it. Being woke and secret about it isn’t impressing me

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] Apr 10, 2024 at 17:29 UTC

Their son had stated to his parents he wanted to shoot up his school. They went ahead and purchased him a gun anyway

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] Apr 09, 2024 at 22:17 UTC

Listening to this through one earbud at the world’s loudest McDonald’s PlayPlace. Good times

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] Apr 09, 2024 at 22:04 UTC

The parents literally gave the kid a gun and knew he fantasized about shooting up his school. This case was an outlier in that not only did they know they had a shitty kid, they did nothing to stop or discourage him from the violence they knew he was capable of. Truly deplorable people

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] Apr 08, 2024 at 15:27 UTC

Yikes

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] Apr 08, 2024 at 00:54 UTC

After the last eclipse, I achieved full Panavision, supported by THX hearing. Life’s been good to me so far

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] Apr 07, 2024 at 13:37 UTC

I turned my feces into bitcoin with a trick I learned at a Trump rally

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] Apr 04, 2024 at 01:41 UTC

All vastly different, but fun games

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] Mar 24, 2024 at 18:30 UTC

It’s a nut-sack, dude. Get the terminology right

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] Mar 18, 2024 at 20:03 UTC

Not having the added stress of wondering if President Fucknuts was gonna start a war because he didn’t take his meds that day. 2020 sucked

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] Mar 18, 2024 at 20:00 UTC

Found one of those after my Dad died. I was like okay, neat. What do I do with this thing?

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] Mar 17, 2024 at 22:55 UTC

I almost completely stopped posting on social media when I had this realization. And that I am also a nihilist

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] Mar 12, 2024 at 00:11 UTC

60 people who don’t wanna pay Trump’s legal bills is the correct answer

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] Mar 08, 2024 at 00:54 UTC

“May have”? You don’t throw your name into the discourse unless you’re pretty sure it was your fault

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] Mar 03, 2024 at 02:09 UTC

Over a craps game in the men’s bathroom?

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] Feb 27, 2024 at 23:47 UTC

Wisconsin had to deal with their Roundy’s purchase, which kind of ruined most of those grocery stores. Kroger sucks

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] Feb 23, 2024 at 23:31 UTC

Phew, thank god

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] Feb 23, 2024 at 21:04 UTC

So, what you’re saying is that the Nintendo Switch is more powerful than the XBOX Series S?

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] Feb 22, 2024 at 23:46 UTC

This dude was sick as fuck RIP

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] Feb 19, 2024 at 01:54 UTC

@jwhdavison.bsky.social
You’re the hockey player, right?

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] Feb 12, 2024 at 00:43 UTC

It’s not that they kick my ass that hurts, it’s when they tell me they had sex with my mom last night

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] Feb 12, 2024 at 00:38 UTC

Oh shit, Anakin should have been Jonathan Taylor Thomas just like my kid sister said

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] Feb 11, 2024 at 18:59 UTC

Doing my part to try and help destroy every toilet at work tomorrow

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Brandon @javastout.bsky.social [ View ] Feb 11, 2024 at 17:39 UTC

I Hate Myself and I Want to Die, was written by Kurt Cobain on a Super Bowl Sunday where he was left alone with a bag of chips and a tub of French onion dip for 45 minutes

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