LrdSlvrhnd

LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 05, 2024 at 16:54 UTC

Okay but what about cigarette smoke??

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 05, 2024 at 16:54 UTC

...I feel attacked. By the smoke. Because the smoke is always attacking me, no matter where I sit.

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 05, 2024 at 16:50 UTC

Better than a random man, amirite?

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 05, 2024 at 01:05 UTC

1) Dems aren't doing that. 2) We want a Democratic candidate who at least somewhat aligns with our values, not an embarrassment to the Kennedy name.

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 27, 2024 at 17:04 UTC

Fun fact: Actually sitting on her wouldn't convince her anyway. Source: Continued experience in the matter.

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 26, 2024 at 19:22 UTC

Double? That seems low.

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 26, 2024 at 19:22 UTC

It is as much of a unit as a single sock is a unit.

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 18, 2024 at 04:22 UTC

You could have stopped after 5 words, to be honest.

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 17, 2024 at 17:25 UTC

I once got honked at for not illegally turning right on red (there was a crosswalk signal)... when I wasn't even planning on turning right when the light turned green (I was going straight). Dude just laid on his horn, and I was in no hurry so when it turned green I just sat there for 30 seconds.

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 17, 2024 at 17:16 UTC

Sleepy kitty vibes are real.

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 11, 2024 at 17:10 UTC

The cynic in me sees "more flexible work hours" and thinks "the week's schedule isn't published until Sunday night so you don't know if you're working Monday morning or not until 10 hours before you have to be there".

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 09, 2024 at 06:07 UTC

Lies. No cat would willfully sleep in a box meant for a cat to sleep in.

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 08, 2024 at 04:34 UTC

The Donald Trump?

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 07, 2024 at 02:13 UTC

That seems more like a bare minimum of butter.

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 04, 2024 at 08:05 UTC

I feel like, say, July of 2022 was probably a wee bit warmer than this past January, though. Unless you meant in comparison to said months in previous years, but that's not what's being conveyed.

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 03, 2024 at 17:37 UTC

And they wonder why ACAB is a thing.

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 03, 2024 at 07:32 UTC

They're cats. What do they know about baking?

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 03, 2024 at 07:27 UTC

Mr. Pibb is basically only available where Coke doesn't have the rights to bottle & distribute Dr Pepper. They must have renegotiated.

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 02, 2024 at 08:12 UTC

I have seen people order it. And come back for more.

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 02, 2024 at 08:11 UTC

Yeah, I sell concessions at a theater, and Diet Coke outsells everything not-water, and it's not even really that close. Like, Coke is definitely a strong contender in certain shows, but it's very rare that it outsells Diet Coke even then.

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 02, 2024 at 08:06 UTC

Mr. Pibb kills it, but his lack of a degree keeps him from being hired.

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] May 31, 2024 at 06:38 UTC

Or is it that the proud boys are in... jail, learning their lesson?

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] May 30, 2024 at 13:12 UTC

...I feel attacked.

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] May 30, 2024 at 00:06 UTC

And they wonder why people say all cops are bastards...

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] May 27, 2024 at 18:28 UTC

"You got tied up by Batgirl, that's enough of a present."

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] May 27, 2024 at 07:27 UTC

I have a picture of my former cat sitting on the box of the new flat-screen TV we'd just gotten, our first one. I think he knew this would be his only chance at sitting on this TV, which he greatly enjoyed doing.

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] May 24, 2024 at 20:12 UTC

That should save time and money with drug testing, right?

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] May 18, 2024 at 06:53 UTC

Well, compared to MAGA, I guess.

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] May 18, 2024 at 06:52 UTC

What... what does not being able to find an old white dude have to do with being able to count votes in the first place?

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] May 18, 2024 at 03:27 UTC

But is he really left-wing...

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] May 16, 2024 at 05:41 UTC

You take that back, the original Battlestar Galactica was not terrible!

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] May 16, 2024 at 05:40 UTC

"Man, this movie is terrible... but it could've been so good with just a few tweaks! Let's try this again!"

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] May 16, 2024 at 05:33 UTC

Yeah, given how little I drink, I'm pretty sure alcohol isn't to blame for my shape, so pretty sure total abstention won't help much. Also it's weird that they're hugging all these animals.

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] May 09, 2024 at 16:53 UTC

Nah. Boneless wings are pre-sauced, chicken nuggets have to be dipped.

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] May 06, 2024 at 17:00 UTC

I'm just saying... these are mutated turtles. They can be drawn sexy without boobs!

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] May 06, 2024 at 17:00 UTC

Okay, and? Sirens and Gorgons aren't turtles. Gorgons had snakes for hair, but they weren't themselves snakes. (Also, Gorgons were generally depicted as pretty darn ugly, with large, bulging eyes.) Sirens, meanwhile, are basically mermaids with fishy bottoms but humany tops.

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] May 06, 2024 at 03:44 UTC

OK but why do the turtles have boobs?

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] May 04, 2024 at 19:20 UTC

$100,000 at least. Then I could also afford a down payment on a house as well as a new car. And a customized bumper sticker & yard sign saying "Driving an ugly piece of shit payed for this."

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] Apr 29, 2024 at 04:21 UTC

Only 3? My money's on before that.

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] Apr 26, 2024 at 01:26 UTC

It's not surprising that The Onion isn't profitable when you consider reality the last few years is far more absurd than anything they can come up with

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] Apr 25, 2024 at 07:24 UTC

Except... if everyone's being taught that, then everybody's running around making noise and nobody's running around. So this plan doesn't even make any sense.

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] Apr 14, 2024 at 18:27 UTC

He doesn't even like joking suggestions, or anti-suggestions such as "You should cast *person who I absolutely don't want cast* as *character*!" Which, hard to blame him for that, either.

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] Apr 14, 2024 at 18:21 UTC

But the fun thing is, the IRS already knows which it is! They just won't tell you!

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] Apr 12, 2024 at 17:37 UTC

Gosh, would be nice if they did anything that actually remotely resembled their jobs.

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] Apr 12, 2024 at 17:35 UTC

She needs to learn how to just shut the eff up already.

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] Apr 11, 2024 at 05:20 UTC

OK but she'd make a terrible Rich Uncle Moneybags.

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] Apr 10, 2024 at 07:40 UTC

I mean to be fair, 20 people the size of me take up significantly more room than 20 people the size of, say, Twiggy. You gotta say "about" 20 so you don't get 20 fat slobs suing you 'cause they can't all fit.

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] Apr 10, 2024 at 07:34 UTC

Oh look, evidence of election fraud! And shocker, it's on the right *yet again*.

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] Apr 10, 2024 at 04:52 UTC

He should be on trial...

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LrdSlvrhnd @lrdslvrhnd.bsky.social [ View ] Mar 16, 2024 at 06:11 UTC

Well sure, servicing costs money. It's way cheaper to just risk it, especially since it's not *their* lives in danger. Who cares about the peasants? What are they gonna do, stop flying? Yeah, right.

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