milo

milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 06, 2024 at 16:34 UTC

I get that a lot.

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 06, 2024 at 15:45 UTC

Ha! I’d forgotten that. I’d definitely ask SheMe out. Look how how she am.

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 06, 2024 at 15:29 UTC

I hate this to hell. Get off this site immediately, and burn your account before you go.

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 06, 2024 at 15:26 UTC

I just saw a picture of Dion Dublin and thought “… did he die recently?” Googled it, he didn’t. But was also unnerving.

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 28, 2024 at 17:47 UTC

“Prevent ingress of any Welshman”.

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 18, 2024 at 09:06 UTC

Did I know you were ‘Strayan?

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 18, 2024 at 08:45 UTC

No-one else looking at this and thinking “well at least we’re not going down on the last day, in our last ever game at Goodison”. Because we can’t meet all those criteria now. And look, I’ll be honest, we’re still shite enough for the drop.

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 18, 2024 at 08:43 UTC

Arf! To the letter of the law! Today so far: COVID, still Fished partner’s earring from out of the toilet with my hand Internet floor cookies I’ve had worse days, mind.

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 18, 2024 at 08:39 UTC

Yeah? Well I’m seven years old and I’ve just wet my shorts in the kitchen ON PURPOSE. Some of this might not be true. The cookies sound lovely, actually. Are there any left, or is it just these ones I knocked onto the floor? The floor cookies?

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 18, 2024 at 08:36 UTC

[sweeps cookies off counter like a petulant child] DONE!

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 18, 2024 at 08:31 UTC

I’ve immediately gone off you. Where’s the coconut and chocolate? In fact, forget it. We’re done. Dee. You. Enn.

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 15, 2024 at 09:09 UTC

Sad one for the Everton clan. Kevin Campbell has passed way. A nice man.

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 15, 2024 at 09:08 UTC

Won’t wake up, despite That charger stuck in my arse; Cheap, older model

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 15, 2024 at 07:06 UTC

People who I like - recommend someone you like, for me to follow. Clever, interesting, funny, skilled at something, or passionate about something. Any of that.

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 15, 2024 at 02:57 UTC

Turns out I’m pregnant!!! JOKES! Just the ‘Rona. Thought it was the flu. Just the Rona. Three years of swerving it, and now I have it I’m glad I spent three years trying to swerve it because it’s fucking unpleasant. You’ve probably caught it by reading this.

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 13, 2024 at 14:09 UTC

The last one was returned via the most economical route. This time I’ll be ticking “treat as abandoned” if you’re not in to sign for it.

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 13, 2024 at 14:04 UTC

One soiled colostomy bag on its way to you via Australia Post, my good man!

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 13, 2024 at 11:05 UTC

This’ll cheer you up I’ve got the fucking flu.

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 13, 2024 at 00:45 UTC

Hey mate, have you got any crepes back there?

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 12, 2024 at 15:33 UTC

Blocked and unfriended.

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 12, 2024 at 12:43 UTC

“Man confirms, will watch match”

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 12, 2024 at 10:06 UTC

Make a movie milder Mississippi Smouldering The Limited Mr Ripley Das Sandal

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 12, 2024 at 09:55 UTC

One of a few remaining mohicans.

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 12, 2024 at 08:08 UTC

I am SICK of reading shit like this!

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 12, 2024 at 07:24 UTC

Love this question! I’ve never read the poem before, but I’m leaning towards the first reading - mainly because the theme is echoed in the fifth stanza in abridged format which REALLY lends itself to the first interpretation. To me, at least.

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 05, 2024 at 11:45 UTC

Blocked and unfollowed

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 05, 2024 at 11:42 UTC

Everything about this!

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 05, 2024 at 11:41 UTC

It’s just a mark of quality breeding, J. Quality breeding.

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 05, 2024 at 10:52 UTC

Herringbone though…!

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 05, 2024 at 10:49 UTC

Can anyone smell banana? #Farage

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 01, 2024 at 13:18 UTC

Regularly have this convo with Ms Milo, who occasional dabbles in minor cosmetics because “look at my wrinkles” - like she doesn’t already wear them like tattoos of a life well spent, improving the lives of everyone she meets.

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 01, 2024 at 11:15 UTC

I had a look at “ugly women”. Every single one that looked even remotely realistic was categorically not ugly. Heavy eyebrows, dark skin, freckles, an angular jaw. I don’t know where to divert my anger, but the future looks shit.

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 01, 2024 at 09:32 UTC

Beef vermicelli And a side of sautéed veg Who got alien?

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] May 31, 2024 at 15:16 UTC

Trump has absolutely fucking lost it. Rambling fucking moron.

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] May 31, 2024 at 10:15 UTC

Seems like they smell nice is my new fave.

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] May 31, 2024 at 09:49 UTC

Also, I’m assuming Twitter is a fucking bin-fire of civil war, insurrection, and My Real Presidenting right now. Ahhh, I miss twitter. Oh, hang on. No, I don’t.

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] May 31, 2024 at 09:48 UTC

Trumpsters don’t handle defeat well, do they? It’s always a fix, a hoax, a scam, fake. Say one thing for that fucking fraud - that lying, cheating, law-breaking, phony, filibustering, criminal blowhard - but he’s definitely permanently changed political discourse. For the worse. That’s his legacy.

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] May 31, 2024 at 02:17 UTC

Can he ask for his money back now? He’s probably got some bills he’ll need to settle.

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] May 27, 2024 at 12:24 UTC

I’m now laughing a lot at this. “Do I stay true to my principles and just be an outright racist shitbag? I can live with myself. But then… I’ve got 87 followers. What happens to them? What about TruePatriotKKK9187? Who’ll share his memes? No. No, for their sake - I’ll remain a cowardly shithouse.”

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] May 27, 2024 at 12:18 UTC

How lacking in conviction would you have to be, to be a racist and think and do racist things, but be scared to actually admit to being a racist in case your twitter account got closed down? Imagine weighing all those priorities, and putting the preservation of your twitter account at the top.

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] May 27, 2024 at 12:13 UTC

“No, not her - one of the ones that have got, like, brown skin but slightly whiter features. Hey, listen, I thought Naomi Campbell was gorgeous in her day.” These shithouses are only ever one strong whisky away from saying what they actually mean on the matter, the fucking cowards.

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] May 27, 2024 at 12:11 UTC

I’ve noticed the Manosphere lads - your Tates, your Shields, your Myron Gaines’ of this world - have all been particularly vocal on this subject. Ironic given every single one of them looks like a hybrid baked bean/gargoyle. The internet needs a great rain, I feel.

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] May 27, 2024 at 12:09 UTC

The “I’m not being racist, it’s not historically accurate and she’s not beautiful” bunch? Yeah. Looking forward to them rewriting Macbeth because witches aren’t real.

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] May 27, 2024 at 11:44 UTC

And that’s exactly why, on the day they finally close the internet down, you shall be chaired shoulder-high from this site by a group of we peers, heralded as one of its last true champions.

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milo @miltfarquhar.bsky.social [ View ] May 27, 2024 at 11:40 UTC

Not gonna lie. I had a quick flick through your photos to see whether you recycled this one on a daily basis, and was delighted to see that - as far as I can make out - each is a unique, daily iteration of the same pose. That sounded less sinister in my head. Luckily, I haven’t hit reply yet.

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