Stephen King's avatar

Stephen King

@stephenking.bsky.social

Did you hear the one about the hipster ice cube? It was water before it was cool. Thank you, ladies and gentlemen. Don’t forget to tip your waitress.

34 replies 79 reposts 656 likes


nobody's avatar nobody @zap.bsky.social
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@panic.gay maybe he will join the workshop tonight ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

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Brian Keene's avatar Brian Keene @briankeene.bsky.social
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I just read this one out loud to my 15-year old and got a heavy, ponderous sigh from him. Well done! ;-)

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The Darkhorse's avatar The Darkhorse @thedarkhorse.bsky.social
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Dad joke.

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Choying Palmo's avatar Choying Palmo @cchoetso.bsky.social
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Ūber-dad joke.

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Ian Miles Schlong 's avatar Ian Miles Schlong @tedcruznipples.com
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More comedic substance here than anything Elon has tweeted

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Ian Miles Schlong 's avatar Ian Miles Schlong @tedcruznipples.com
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thinman's avatar thinman @handle.invalid
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..and the meatloaf

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felicia's avatar felicia @felicia.bsky.social
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they work hard so you don’t have too!

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James Hanna Garvin's avatar James Hanna Garvin @burntwhiskeytoast.bsky.social
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Steve. Stephen.

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John Scalzi's avatar John Scalzi @scalzi.com
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(sigh) (unrolls the garden hose) (turns it on) (sprays)

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's avatar @alwayslearning.bsky.social
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(groan) 😄

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The Real David Rogers's avatar The Real David Rogers @davidrogersbooks.bsky.social
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Nah, it was just a square, before and after it got cool. (Cube , , , square--get it? 'Cuz they're both sorta rectangular. All purchases final--no refunds.)

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Alex Cortez's avatar Alex Cortez @alexstar.bsky.social
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What's brown and sticky? a stick.

0 replies 1 reposts 2 likes


Ravin Boodram's avatar Ravin Boodram @handle.invalid
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Here's your damn 'like.'

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Professor Lilly's avatar Professor Lilly @professorlilly.bsky.social
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Stephen King has officially run out of things to say! No; wait; is Eleanor Rosevelt flying? I'll always remember the parody of you they did on SNL decades ago; "you" were being interviewed, might have been on Weekend Update; you were typing furiously writing a book even while talking.

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Clandestino's avatar Clandestino @clandestino.be
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It's never too late to try standup comedy 😁

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Jakob H.'s avatar Jakob H. @jakobh.bsky.social
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I’ve never seen a more solid water joke than this one.

0 replies 0 reposts 4 likes


DM's avatar DM @superuber.bsky.social
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The quality content I have been looking for! :D

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Matt B's avatar Matt B @mattb92.bsky.social
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10/10

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes


Sara Joy ☠️'s avatar Sara Joy ☠️ @sjoy.lol
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What's white and silly? A windowsill.

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EK 's avatar EK @gypsychick.bsky.social
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You’re so much younger but you make me miss my dad. 🤣

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Delicious Alex's avatar Delicious Alex @deliciousalex.bsky.social
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You are such a dad…

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ZenTangent's avatar ZenTangent @zentangent.bsky.social
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Since "water" is multi phase capable (ice, water & steam) ... Wondering if. steam (heated) is capable of superheated state. Or the water's atoms absorb so much potential energy, the atoms become something else.

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Marisa 🖤✒️🩸☠️🩸✒️🖤's avatar Marisa 🖤✒️🩸☠️🩸✒️🖤 @marisaamber27.bsky.social
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😆

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Ice Spice (not her) 's avatar Ice Spice (not her) @icespice.bsky.social
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Come back book daddy

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Rufus Hickok's avatar Rufus Hickok @rufus-hickok.bsky.social
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The one I heard was about the hipster who burned his mouth because he was eating pizza before it was cool. I think the ice one's better.

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sharp&skinny's avatar sharp&skinny @br2.bsky.social
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OH MY GOD I WAS JUST WONDERING IF YOU WERE HERE YET!!!OMG WELCOME TO THE PARTY ! Yaaaaasss!!

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Patrick Stephenson's avatar Patrick Stephenson @patiomensch.bsky.social
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Stephen, you rock! Thanks for all the great books.

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𝐚𝐧𝐧 ☻'s avatar 𝐚𝐧𝐧 ☻ @annsmiley.bsky.social
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... dad?

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acrofish (Wayne)'s avatar acrofish (Wayne) @acrofish.bsky.social
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0 replies 0 reposts 3 likes


Mom of No Rank's avatar Mom of No Rank @momofnorank.bsky.social
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This one is such a groaner even my groan groaned. :D

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Matt Needles 's avatar Matt Needles @voodude.bsky.social
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Stephen, you dog!

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Rick's avatar Rick @rdp2.bsky.social
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damn, that's a funny joke, you some kind of comedy writer or something?

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Jason Fugate 's avatar Jason Fugate @jasonfugate.bsky.social
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@jaketapper.bsky.social may mute you for this.

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