𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 06, 2024 at 15:37 UTC

I’ve hired hundreds of people but I would never hire a felon - why the fuck would I vote for one?

0 replies 1 reposts 7 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 29, 2024 at 09:33 UTC

Politics is like riding a bus. You catch a bus that takes you close to where you want, then you switch busses for one that gets you closer. If you don't hop on the Biden bus you’ll get pushed onto the Trump bus going 90 mph in the opposite direction and heading for a cliff.

0 replies 4 reposts 11 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 27, 2024 at 03:00 UTC

The Unwritten Rules of Journalism: #1: Republicans Don't Get Blamed. # 2: Democrats Don't Get Credit.

1 replies 2 reposts 10 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 27, 2024 at 02:41 UTC

If you put Marjorie Taylor Greene's brain in a bird it would fly backwards.

1 replies 6 reposts 18 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 27, 2024 at 02:37 UTC

I love how Mike Johnson has software on his phone to keep from doing porn but goes down to Mar-a-Lago to hatch plots with a convicted felon who fucked a stripper while his wife and newborn were at home.

0 replies 0 reposts 5 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 26, 2024 at 19:53 UTC

I date a good number of Republican men and that number is zero.

0 replies 0 reposts 16 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 26, 2024 at 19:13 UTC

Unsure, coincidence I guess.

0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 26, 2024 at 18:07 UTC

I just can’t believe that any woman married this diaper sniper.

4 replies 2 reposts 14 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 26, 2024 at 18:05 UTC

Wondering if the Supreme Court will be leaving a flaming steamer on America’s doorstep before ringing the doorbell and running off for vacation this Friday.

1 replies 4 reposts 15 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 26, 2024 at 18:05 UTC

If anyone would like a follow-back, just say something complimentary about me in the replies and I’ll see what I can do.

6 replies 2 reposts 7 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 26, 2024 at 18:04 UTC

The upside to Steve Bannon going to prison is he can lose 100 pounds and take a shower for the first time in years.

1 replies 0 reposts 6 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 26, 2024 at 18:03 UTC

It’s impossible to plan for the Fall because it could be either Autumn or the fall of civilization.

0 replies 0 reposts 4 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 26, 2024 at 18:01 UTC

Bible salesman to defend 34 felony convictions on live TV tonight.

0 replies 0 reposts 4 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 26, 2024 at 17:57 UTC

Dude with a Rolex and wedding band can’t get a girlfriend and it’s Biden’s fault.

2 replies 0 reposts 5 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 26, 2024 at 17:56 UTC

On my flight back to DC both pilots are women which sparked a debate amongst our group about whether using the term “cockpit,” was appropriate. We decided to call it a “clitpit,” which also makes it hijack-proof since male hijackers would never be able to find it.

1 replies 7 reposts 39 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 26, 2024 at 17:56 UTC

If the Supreme Court rules Trump had immunity Joe should have Seal Team Six meet Donald in the parking lot before the debate.

1 replies 1 reposts 7 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 26, 2024 at 17:55 UTC

Age is the least interesting thing about Trump and the most interesting thing about Joe Biden. Now, if Biden raped some women, cheated on his taxes, caught 88 felonies indictments and was convicted of 34 of them, the media might not think Joe’s age was all that interesting.

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 26, 2024 at 17:54 UTC

Imagine being the face of the “My Wife Shouldn’t Be Allowed To Leave Me” movement.

0 replies 0 reposts 5 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 26, 2024 at 17:53 UTC

The kid from Scranton who kicked the ass of the bully from Queens.

0 replies 2 reposts 7 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 26, 2024 at 17:38 UTC

I like men who think about the future and I don't mean just drinking pineapple juice before a date.

1 replies 2 reposts 9 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 26, 2024 at 17:36 UTC

I will Kevin.

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 26, 2024 at 17:32 UTC

Posted to Twitter. They miss you there.

1 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] May 11, 2024 at 13:11 UTC

To quote Britt, “Enough is enough.”

1 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Mar 28, 2024 at 02:21 UTC

If you're naked on the front porch and the neighbors can't see you, it's rural, If the neighbors call the cops, it's suburban. If the neighbors ignore you, it's urban. If your neighbor is also naked, it's Florida.

5 replies 4 reposts 29 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Mar 13, 2024 at 10:00 UTC

Went to Starbucks this morning and asked the barista for her mildest roast and she said my hair would look better with highlights.

3 replies 6 reposts 36 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Mar 11, 2024 at 02:15 UTC

I’m not that familiar with this platform yet Murph .

2 replies 0 reposts 3 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Mar 10, 2024 at 03:27 UTC

I’m pretty sure no one reads my posts on bsky.

34 replies 9 reposts 72 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Mar 10, 2024 at 03:26 UTC

I got food poisoning from a can of Spaghetti-O’s and it was the most painful vowel movement of my life.

3 replies 2 reposts 23 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Mar 10, 2024 at 03:16 UTC

[text from boyfriend] BF: "I got hit by a car today. Paula brought me to the hospital and they're doing X-rays but so far I have some broken ribs, a broken arm, a fracture of the left leg and they may have to amputate my right foot." Me: "Who's Paula?"

2 replies 8 reposts 39 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Mar 10, 2024 at 03:14 UTC

Boy, if I had a nipple for every time Trump told a lie.

0 replies 0 reposts 14 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Feb 22, 2024 at 04:29 UTC

Muslims don’t recognize Jews as God's chosen people, Jews don’t recognize Jesus as the Messiah, Protestants don’t recognize the Pope as the leader of the Christian world, and Evangelicals don’t recognize each other at Hooters.

9 replies 17 reposts 69 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Feb 22, 2024 at 04:28 UTC

Jordan and Comer say Hunter Biden wasn't qualified to be on Burisma's board because he isn't an energy expert so can someone please tell me why Nikki Haley was on Boeing's board?

2 replies 6 reposts 30 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Feb 22, 2024 at 04:27 UTC

Color name: Coup Klux Tan.

11 replies 10 reposts 62 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Feb 20, 2024 at 12:43 UTC

The media is very biased. A good example is when Michelle Obama gave a speech and the media loved it, but then went total apeshit when Melania Trump gave the exact same speech.

7 replies 5 reposts 50 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Feb 19, 2024 at 21:33 UTC

I hate it when people humble brag about where they went to college. I have this friend who went to Harvard and she just won't shut up about it. She's always been like that, even when we were in college together.

7 replies 2 reposts 40 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Feb 19, 2024 at 21:27 UTC

A couple weeks ago I noticed a sign on the road that said "Republican puppies for sale” and then today the sign said "Democrat puppies for sale. I stopped and asked the breeder why the puppies changed parties and he said, “Well, ma’am they have their eyes open now."

2 replies 6 reposts 34 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Feb 19, 2024 at 21:14 UTC

Thank you! Followed all!!!

0 replies 0 reposts 3 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Feb 19, 2024 at 19:44 UTC

The difference between Melania and Lady Justice is that Lady Justice is still coming for Donald.

3 replies 5 reposts 35 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Feb 19, 2024 at 19:44 UTC

There aren’t too many things in life as disappointing as having to poop right after a shower.

4 replies 0 reposts 16 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Feb 19, 2024 at 19:44 UTC

Being pretty and faking smart just cost her client $450,000,000.

0 replies 2 reposts 21 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Feb 19, 2024 at 19:43 UTC

Matt Gaetz is going down like a fat kid on a seesaw.

3 replies 2 reposts 20 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Feb 19, 2024 at 19:42 UTC

Friend in Austin was at a bar and saw this.

8 replies 26 reposts 127 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Feb 19, 2024 at 19:41 UTC

I’ve been a Democrat my entire life and still don’t know any Communists.

7 replies 3 reposts 30 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Feb 19, 2024 at 17:53 UTC

Tucker Carlson’s head is so far up Putin’s ass he can see Sarah Palin’s front porch.

3 replies 14 reposts 58 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Feb 19, 2024 at 17:52 UTC

Trumpism is like climate change: it's already here, it has done irreparable damage, and even if we take action now we'll be dealing with it's impact for the rest of our lives.

0 replies 8 reposts 29 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Feb 19, 2024 at 17:52 UTC

Where else other than politics could you could be found guilty of rape, get indicted 91 times, and still be under serious consideration for a job?

0 replies 3 reposts 18 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Feb 19, 2024 at 17:51 UTC

I feel sorry for Mike Johnson. Before he became Speaker, only a handful of people knew what an idiot he was. Now, a few hundred million people know.

0 replies 1 reposts 16 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Feb 19, 2024 at 17:51 UTC

Lauren Boebert is so dumb she thought LBJ was the Spanish translation for blowjob.

3 replies 7 reposts 25 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Feb 19, 2024 at 17:50 UTC

Start naming mass shootings after politicians who take money from the NRA.

0 replies 1 reposts 12 likes

𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.bsky.social [ View ] Feb 19, 2024 at 17:49 UTC

Good luck Texas!

2 replies 3 reposts 16 likes