J.R.

J.R. @jrbolt.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 06, 2024 at 06:11 UTC

It's highly sus to be afraid of catching a weird disease that mutilates you

0 replies 0 reposts 6 likes

J.R. @jrbolt.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 06, 2024 at 06:09 UTC

I'm listening.

0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

J.R. @jrbolt.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 06, 2024 at 04:32 UTC

Anyone who loftily insists we have to respect Biden because he's old as shit should be forced to sit beside him as he speeds down the autobahn

0 replies 1 reposts 5 likes

J.R. @jrbolt.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 06, 2024 at 04:23 UTC

I was just doing a riff but it's good to know the actual facts of the case: Everyone hated Lord Byron

2 replies 0 reposts 16 likes

J.R. @jrbolt.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 06, 2024 at 04:18 UTC

You probably never saw the burgermeister in real life but there was always Ulf, loathsome Ulf, whose scent could only be described as "rennet-befouled"

1 replies 0 reposts 8 likes

J.R. @jrbolt.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 06, 2024 at 04:14 UTC

Logging in with punchcards to my difference engine to call a haberdasher a "Bismarck lookin ass"

2 replies 0 reposts 12 likes

J.R. @jrbolt.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 06, 2024 at 04:10 UTC

Who did bad online debaters drop into arguments before Hitler was invented? Were they like "Your post sounds like something Vlad Tepesh would say!" I suspect it is so. The past was also bad.

11 replies 0 reposts 42 likes

J.R. @jrbolt.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 06, 2024 at 03:36 UTC

The only good kind of trad

0 replies 0 reposts 3 likes

J.R. @jrbolt.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 06, 2024 at 03:23 UTC

It's fairly recent. It's received wisdom from memes, mostly

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

J.R. @jrbolt.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 06, 2024 at 02:53 UTC

That's the worst one. You can only die one time but math can fuck you up every minute of your life

0 replies 0 reposts 5 likes

J.R. @jrbolt.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 06, 2024 at 02:37 UTC

It sucks! There's just some stuff that's too wild to conveniently do at home. Prisoner Calisthenics just don't get it done.

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

J.R. @jrbolt.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 06, 2024 at 02:33 UTC

Well shit. First I've heard about it. this fucking sucks

www.latimes.com/entertainmen...

1 replies 1 reposts 5 likes

J.R. @jrbolt.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 06, 2024 at 02:20 UTC

Our gym is the size of a factory floor and there are 3 bench press benches. I have only seen one of them free around 1:00 AM

1 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

J.R. @jrbolt.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 06, 2024 at 02:11 UTC

Hell is Other Men

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

J.R. @jrbolt.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 06, 2024 at 02:06 UTC

Alright I did it. I went to the gym and it was awful and crowded like the muscle freak room in Tetsuo: Body Hammer but I did it and now it's done and I never have to go back. Right? Right?

8 replies 0 reposts 43 likes

J.R. @jrbolt.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 06, 2024 at 02:03 UTC

Once you internalize the "all the horror in Lovecraft was a metaphor for racism" meme, you're cooked as a reader, unable to perceive that Lovecraft was also afraid of things like "being alone in the Arctic" and "dying"

6 replies 0 reposts 16 likes

J.R. @jrbolt.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 05, 2024 at 23:41 UTC

The favourite phrase of managers who are, as they speak the words, leaning

0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

J.R. @jrbolt.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 05, 2024 at 23:23 UTC

There were two 24-hour gyms in my dense urban area and one of them moved away. Now there's one left. Hell Is Other People, Manifested

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

J.R. @jrbolt.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 05, 2024 at 23:17 UTC

It must be. Every gym I've been to is cramped like the muscle freak room in Tetsuo 2. Shit sucks

1 replies 0 reposts 3 likes

J.R. @jrbolt.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 05, 2024 at 23:00 UTC

Don't tease me now if this is a thing that other people have that I don't i'm going to be even sadder than usual

1 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

J.R. @jrbolt.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 05, 2024 at 22:53 UTC

Throwing myself under a dark cloak for mysterious Ortolan Get-Ups

0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

J.R. @jrbolt.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 05, 2024 at 22:49 UTC

It's an accurate statement of their beliefs, but instead of a hot leather high-heel, it's a business failson's boat shoe

0 replies 0 reposts 6 likes

J.R. @jrbolt.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 05, 2024 at 22:47 UTC

I need to cop... you've gotta put the right energy out into the universe if you want to get it back...

1 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

J.R. @jrbolt.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 05, 2024 at 22:43 UTC

Need this for the battle vest... putting it in a sacred spot next to the Death logo

2 replies 1 reposts 31 likes

J.R. @jrbolt.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 05, 2024 at 22:36 UTC

Squatting is a rite that puts the soul in harmony with the ass. The eyes of God and Man have no place here.

1 replies 0 reposts 16 likes

J.R. @jrbolt.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 05, 2024 at 22:34 UTC

Very excited now!

0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

J.R. @jrbolt.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 05, 2024 at 22:33 UTC

I can tune the world out but I would like to tune the world out of me

0 replies 0 reposts 4 likes

J.R. @jrbolt.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 05, 2024 at 22:32 UTC

🇺🇸🗽🇺🇸🗽🇺🇸🗽🇺🇸🗽🇺🇸🗽

0 replies 1 reposts 15 likes

J.R. @jrbolt.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 05, 2024 at 22:31 UTC

Why don't they let workers sit down at cashier and other retail jobs? Because a job is a punishment that you receive for not being born rich. Anything you do to make a job easier, better, more comfortable or better-paid is a betrayal of what you deserve, which is: suffering.

4 replies 7 reposts 66 likes

J.R. @jrbolt.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 05, 2024 at 22:29 UTC

They should have stalls in the gym like in public bathrooms so one doesn't have to be perceived

6 replies 0 reposts 36 likes

J.R. @jrbolt.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 05, 2024 at 22:20 UTC

That lady in the picture must be 80 years old now and I bet she still tells people, "One afternoon I watched Keith Haring work and then I went and watched The Keep in theatres"

1 replies 0 reposts 4 likes