Raven

SLURPBERG: UNDEFEATED @slurpman.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 29, 2024 at 23:41 UTC

you're not dril, stop spelling shit wrong intentionally you look like an asshole

27 replies 10 reposts 50 likes

Raven @platinumclit.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 30, 2024 at 22:43 UTC

Put a fucking guitar in Omega male's hands, and you'll hear the most brutal riffs of all time, I know that much. Those guys are also the best at eating pussy.

0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

Raven @platinumclit.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 30, 2024 at 22:40 UTC

Quickest way to get me to mutter "no..." when I'm rifling through racks.

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Raven @platinumclit.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 30, 2024 at 22:38 UTC

Madame, you know the answer, in my case.

0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

Raven @platinumclit.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 28, 2024 at 21:19 UTC

I hate that we're choosing such a slow way to do it. Climate change could take hundreds more years! Let's bring back the looming threat of nuclear war, and get it right this time!

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Raven @platinumclit.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 28, 2024 at 19:23 UTC

When I reached my turn in the ceremony to say my vows, I had a gun in my hand, and I put the barrel in my mouth, and blew my brains out. Then I had this perspective change, as if I was floating above myself. I had never looked more beautiful in my life, than in that moment.

0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

Raven @platinumclit.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 28, 2024 at 19:20 UTC

I had a dream last night that I was walking down the aisle, getting married. And when I got about halfway down the aisle, I realized that the guy I was marrying was the dude who groomed and raped me for four years, when I was a pre-teen.

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Raven @platinumclit.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 28, 2024 at 01:57 UTC

You can't actually cancel a band like them, though. They'll just keep on playing.

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Raven @platinumclit.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 28, 2024 at 01:55 UTC

Anyone watching the debate has a masochism kink. I have the opposite of that.

0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

Raven @platinumclit.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 24, 2024 at 21:42 UTC

One of the best parts of not living my life online? I get to watch all of the drama surrounding posters being exposed as weirdos and degenerates, and it's all news to me. I know none of the people involved, the accusers, or about 99% of the dogpilers.

0 replies 0 reposts 4 likes

Raven @platinumclit.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 24, 2024 at 21:40 UTC

The Democrats have had several chances to codify it into law, but never did, because they liked using the fear of it's overturn as a way to get votes. Well, they fucked that chicken so long, it finally died.

2 replies 0 reposts 3 likes

Raven @platinumclit.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 24, 2024 at 21:38 UTC

I'm glad somebody finally said it. Democrats have been kicking this can down the road for decades, using the threat of an overturn of Roe v Wade as a wedge issue to get votes. Well, somebody finally got it overturned, and so... vote for the same people who did nothing meaningful for 40 years?

1 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

Raven @platinumclit.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 24, 2024 at 00:33 UTC

I've honestly never felt worse for you.

0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

Raven @platinumclit.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 23, 2024 at 01:52 UTC

Black hair, black lipstick, and some deep purple eyeshadow.

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Raven @platinumclit.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 23, 2024 at 01:50 UTC

Oh god, are you going to dye your hair black? That'd be so fucking hot.

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Raven @platinumclit.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 23, 2024 at 01:48 UTC

*sighs* My people.

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Raven @platinumclit.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 23, 2024 at 01:47 UTC

It'd just be the sound of me flicking open my Zippo to light another cigarette.

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Raven @platinumclit.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 22, 2024 at 13:59 UTC

"Hey! You should call out from work, and just play the game!" I say to you, dressed as a miniature cartoonish devil on your left shoulder.

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Raven @platinumclit.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 19, 2024 at 13:49 UTC

I'm "down bad" for cocaine, coffee, and cigarettes. These things are actively killing me.

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Raven @platinumclit.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 17, 2024 at 13:01 UTC

He got desperate after the dogecoin crash.

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Raven @platinumclit.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 16, 2024 at 22:37 UTC

I expect you to prove that in a techno song by noon next Sunday.

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Raven @platinumclit.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 16, 2024 at 22:36 UTC

Clippy bought Bitcoin at 65k.

0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

Raven @platinumclit.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 16, 2024 at 22:34 UTC

Funny enough, that's my typical ketamine hookup.

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Raven @platinumclit.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 16, 2024 at 22:33 UTC

Has anyone ever actually figured out the origin of that symbol, for real? Every thing I read about it seems sketchy and anecdotal, at best.

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Raven @platinumclit.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 16, 2024 at 22:32 UTC

👍

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Raven @platinumclit.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 16, 2024 at 21:51 UTC

Oh, I loved that man dearly. He was the only person who ever loved me, too.

1 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

Raven @platinumclit.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 16, 2024 at 21:49 UTC

Apparently, some Reddit algorithm took my anecdote about calling Andrew Tate "the most obvious down-low self-loathing faggot of all time" on Twitter in 2020, and subsequently being blocked for it, to be worthy of a 7 day ban.

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Raven @platinumclit.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 16, 2024 at 21:46 UTC

My dad has his psyche destroyed by 28 years of military service, and he blew his brains out in the middle of the New Mexico desert. He was 46.

1 replies 0 reposts 0 likes