|
pubbington ΘΔ@pubbington.bsky.social |
42 followers 160 following 165 posts
Plural creechure/bpd haver 21 Bi/demi, single to death Pronouns Currently: Pup/They/She Fairly certain my owner lost the lock to my kennel Dms are public
|
Dr. Glenn Patrick Doyle
@drdoylesays.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Communicate to your inner self & all your "parts:" you do not have to "earn" your right to safety & dignity. You do not have to "earn" the right to exist. Once upon a time, the people around us made us feel like we did-- but you don't have to "perform" to be valid. Not anymore.
0 replies 16 reposts 76 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Think I'll just force myself to lay down, blast the ac, incense, and watch a little youtube
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I just, hope that I can actually sleep soon and more for 3 hours because stability has been fading in and out for a while and I would like it back for longer than a few hours at a time
1 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Like its working but my anxiety still feels through the roof and dinner is nauseating me again, slowing down on thc on top of it has def been making my digestion even worse, plus I get the same nausea, panic, and shakes but not as bad so its like, compound-fractured hell
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
As good as everything still seems to be going, these last 24 hours have been weird as shit. I took an extra klonopin dose because I woke up with an uncontrollable panic attack and it didnt do anything so I've just stuck it out til earlier, tried a quarter and its kinda doing the same thing?
2 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
College is looking at my financial aid stuff finally! Still up in the air but at least I know I'll have an answer within the week, here's to manifesting hope
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Also my shoulders decided to release today so thats been a major relief, lower back still hurts a touch but I feel so much less tense. Gonna eat and do a little cleaning and see if activity and caloric intake will do it
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Well, I may not have slept a touch last night but I feel weirdly calm, which is amazing really, just wish it was calm enough to sleep. Slowly but surely, the crap is working itself out for once it seems
1 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
|
scrunkly the when 🇵🇸
@barkertheskrunkly.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Nothing in his head
2 replies 4 reposts 14 likes
|
Archie 🦌 🔜 AC
@archiehasantlers.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Back at work after #Anthrocon and feeling like this
5 replies 98 reposts 398 likes
|
the postes
@rem.postes.club
[ View ] |
a thing i need to work on is actually talking to people i like and want to foster relationships with instead of just thinking really positively of them often and not saying anything
13 replies 66 reposts 295 likes
|
✨Roley✨
@rosphix.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Humans like depicting animals who are subservient/utilitarian to themselves as embodying the best traits of humanity. They also bestow that on animals that are threats, but -comprehensively- beaten to shit and under control like lions, tigers and wolves. Now-
3 replies 5 reposts 19 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
...or at least get in a better physical state where I dont feel the need to escape into it
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
At this point tho, I dont know if its something I'll ever free myself of because of how much it helps regulate mood swings but the lack thereof is so so much worse, I think it might just be time to quit, too burdensome
1 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Really wish my body wasnt dependent on an exorbidant amount of thc to sleep/exist Im almost out and I need money to eat so... double drug withdrawal timeeeee Gonna be an even more insufferable bitch soon tm
1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Wow actually? Damn, something to be proud of for being ozarkian for once
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Cilantro gene haver here, earl grey is my favorite tea, so seeing other people with it not like it is very interesting
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
|
|
the postes
@rem.postes.club
[ View ] |
it is NOT
4 replies 12 reposts 69 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
this is a bit confusing and brain is having a tough time understanding that this is probably actually *the* thing that is wrong
but thats part of it, the self doesnt feel right, almost no matter what
heres a link: sarahgrahamcounselling.com/2021/08/stru....
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
god this makes so much sense, on so many levels I feel like I'm at an inbetween where my "normal self" is kinda half-merged with caretaker-like headmates that never really ever "take over" in that sense absolutely nothing like a did shift tho, i dont get the amnesia between shifts
1 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
plus being in constant self analysis mode and misunderstanding yourself repeatedly fucks that up bad too
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
ah, i see, thought it was osdd, it was the bpd the whole time, doesnt invalidate a thing tho as important as learning this feels its... so shitty the level of understanding these disorders need to be properly treated
1 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
bpd is on the chain of structural dissociation tho, so, it definitely adds up speaking of I need to go back and do more research on the chain of structural dissociation, its just all been too scary
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
realized that my plurality is just a characterization of my bpd, not a misdiagnosed dissociative disorder they do exist but its all just me, my husky self is my truest self i knew that but the feelings have been so confusing to understand just got a lot goin on :)
1 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Awawa wawoOOOOOOO
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
imagine being an art scammer and the first sentence of your fake bio is "wanting something does not give you the right to have it" YOU LITERALLY STEAL ART LMAO
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
feeling genuinely really good and strong about my feelings right now and not in an acutely manic manner hm, lets keep that up
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
i hate being bad with names, kinda getting tired of my username i didnt even pick my sona name lmao, I would make it that but then I'd be a little too easy to identify for comfort
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
havent heard anything back from the financial aid officeeee im feeling way better today overall tho, i feel more seen and have let go of a lot of many weights I've placed on myself to "grow" and "fit in" (they always crush me) its hard to learn when you have things right the first time
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
The costco werewolf would fix me
0 replies 1 reposts 4 likes
|
da share z0ne
@dasharez0ne.bsky.social
[ View ] |
MIDS - dashare.zone ADMIN
0 replies 8 reposts 73 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
welp, managed to sleep some and feel a lot more stable, but im worried about getting an email denying my financial aid. Trying not to worry about it, but my mental state is absolutely not helping
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
took another half klonopin, didnt want to because im trying to get back on track for the 50th time really chose the worst time ever to try and get clean
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
still havent slept!!!! 3 days now !!!!!!!! i hope my heart explodes!!!!!!!!!!
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
You know your phone usage is bad when the weekly report it gives you basically just says "swetie, please check yourself"
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Beer and deftones on loop at 7am because theres no point
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
As someone who never benefited from a laundry list of meds, its definitely not normal, I'm just way too fried I was also on prozac from 7-11 and I think that affected my serotonin function so idk, either way they desperately need more research and I hope they work out for you
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
One step at a time, sugar would be the best thing to cut out, light walks around your area will help kick muscles back into gear. There's a lot of great fitness stuff on youtube too I understand the gym anxiety, thats why I stick to home workouts/nature walks. You can do this ❤
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
ive seen ai art on black market packaging, its bad
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Being very neurospicy and traumatized before I could form memories properly is probably why I feel like life has been this constant quest of understanding Doesnt help things always seem to get worse, so I just end up not trying, now ive stuck myself
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I think my problem with going to therapy since I was 3 and mainly seeing autism specialists is why I just shoved everything down, masked up, and am only now understanding what I actually need to work on I gotta stop being so hard on myself...
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
google what is avoidant attachment please
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I hate the fact that I'm weird with saying peoples names not because my memory is bad and I forget easy (I do) but because I don't want to make the memory and associate with anyone. Might be my biggest barrier in trying to reach out very healthy behavior, yes
1 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Multiple mental health meds that just never did a damn thing other than send me through an even worse withdrawal, adhd meds that put me into psychosis, I just don't know... I'm too fucking scared and its stupid
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
After 5 years I'm getting tired of being on the "high all the time" train too. Too expensive, and the anxiety without it makes me search for alternatives that just make it worse and undo any actual mental health progress I've made I also feel like it adds onto my sense of unbelonging
1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
|
Jowl Movement ΘΔ @ Megaplex
@ed.dog
[ View ] |
dogs gone fishing
for @truckthepolarbear.co.uk
#art #furryart
2 replies 20 reposts 68 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
its ok, we're just glad that you got through it, we want you around
0 replies 0 reposts 7 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I swirl around like one of those funnel things at the waterpark
1 replies 1 reposts 4 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Im also too scared to do any research because it just feels like yet another inevitable defeat
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
|
|
pubbington ΘΔ
@pubbington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Well I wish I could unconvince myself because its either "diy is safe" or "diy is the worst thing you can do" Ive had more success researching novel psychedelic compounds on fringe forums than learning how exactly hormones work, I just don't know what or who to believe
1 replies 0 reposts 0 likes