heinz beans's avatar

heinz beans

@heinzbeans.bsky.social

1141 followers 228 following 4280 posts

not an account about beans, not not an account about beans
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your least favorite she/they

heinz beans's avatar heinz beans @heinzbeans.bsky.social
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it's fun to say

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

heinz beans's avatar heinz beans @heinzbeans.bsky.social
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for legal reasons, this is a shitpost

2 replies 0 reposts 11 likes

heinz beans's avatar heinz beans @heinzbeans.bsky.social
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me, a person who doesn't use their degree: oh, wow. yeah. good call with that degree choice

3 replies 0 reposts 14 likes

heinz beans's avatar heinz beans @heinzbeans.bsky.social
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games are designed to teach you important lessons and skills. for example, stardew valley teaches the value of community. souls-types, however, taught me to give up

1 replies 0 reposts 14 likes

heinz beans's avatar heinz beans @heinzbeans.bsky.social
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ben & jerry's phish food - it's chocolate ice cream with caramel and marshmallow and chocolate fish chunks

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

heinz beans's avatar heinz beans @heinzbeans.bsky.social
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sometimes, girl dinner is iced cream

2 replies 0 reposts 11 likes

heinz beans's avatar heinz beans @heinzbeans.bsky.social
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christ im sorry dillo 🫂

0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

heinz beans's avatar heinz beans @heinzbeans.bsky.social
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fun fact! pacing in circles? totally helps with that anxious decision im trying to make

3 replies 0 reposts 18 likes

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Je Hyeon Sim 심제현 grampy radish's avatar Je Hyeon Sim 심제현 grampy radish @naptime.theolive.garden
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some low cost hobbies to do offline (assuming some supplies exist), in case touching grass is too weather -draw -origami -build with lego -pace around in circles until the carpet is worn thin -set up fake traps across your road causing drivers to slow down in fear of fucking up their cars -crochet

10 replies 22 reposts 120 likes

heinz beans's avatar heinz beans @heinzbeans.bsky.social
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me taking photos of me before and after making a decision

9 replies 1 reposts 45 likes

heinz beans's avatar heinz beans @heinzbeans.bsky.social
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grill; it's so confusing sometimes, to start a grill!

2 replies 2 reposts 25 likes

heinz beans's avatar heinz beans @heinzbeans.bsky.social
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what is it, about being a human, that makes me want to walk into traffic

4 replies 1 reposts 28 likes

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que sarah sarah they/she's avatar que sarah sarah they/she @sarahndipity.bsky.social
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chonk for president 2024. chin scritches and treats for everyone!

0 replies 1 reposts 4 likes

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Simply Cam's avatar Simply Cam @camc.bsky.social
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Proud kittizen of the Chonk Imperium 🫡

0 replies 2 reposts 11 likes

heinz beans's avatar heinz beans @heinzbeans.bsky.social
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existence is so goddamn expensive

3 replies 1 reposts 28 likes

heinz beans's avatar heinz beans @heinzbeans.bsky.social
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i think my favorite hobby is misinterpreting things others have said

2 replies 2 reposts 23 likes

heinz beans's avatar heinz beans @heinzbeans.bsky.social
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it didn't work out. back to the drawing board

3 replies 0 reposts 23 likes

heinz beans's avatar heinz beans @heinzbeans.bsky.social
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i have to call a guy about a job can everyone say "good luck"

26 replies 0 reposts 55 likes

heinz beans's avatar heinz beans @heinzbeans.bsky.social
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this could fix me, and it's just reciprocated love and affection

1 replies 16 reposts 57 likes

heinz beans's avatar heinz beans @heinzbeans.bsky.social
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this could fix me, and it's just a box of tools

1 replies 0 reposts 13 likes

heinz beans's avatar heinz beans @heinzbeans.bsky.social
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i googled it and was, just whelmed. not over or under. it's about what i expected

2 replies 0 reposts 6 likes

heinz beans's avatar heinz beans @heinzbeans.bsky.social
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i don't know what or who hawk tuah is and i am definitely too afraid to ask

13 replies 2 reposts 44 likes

heinz beans's avatar heinz beans @heinzbeans.bsky.social
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ask not what god can do for you, but how you can attack and dethrone him

1 replies 14 reposts 61 likes

heinz beans's avatar heinz beans @heinzbeans.bsky.social
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is it gay to ride the roller coaster with your bestie

5 replies 3 reposts 38 likes

heinz beans's avatar heinz beans @heinzbeans.bsky.social
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dont get mad at me this is wordplay not swordplay

1 replies 0 reposts 20 likes

heinz beans's avatar heinz beans @heinzbeans.bsky.social
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vehicular manslaughter is so over. i'm killing women with my car now

3 replies 0 reposts 32 likes

Reposted by heinz beans

heinz beans's avatar heinz beans @heinzbeans.bsky.social
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journo coded in that i say a lot of things that aren't necessarily true

1 replies 2 reposts 14 likes

heinz beans's avatar heinz beans @heinzbeans.bsky.social
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i'm not very amused by this line of replies, barry. don't harsh my vibe with my cat

0 replies 0 reposts 10 likes

heinz beans's avatar heinz beans @heinzbeans.bsky.social
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chonk fact! he loves me back, i think

4 replies 0 reposts 50 likes

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Catbus 's avatar Catbus @catbus.bsky.social
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solidarity w the lobsters- I am also a weird alien looking creature being boiled alive by forces beyond my comprehension

2 replies 1 reposts 11 likes

heinz beans's avatar heinz beans @heinzbeans.bsky.social
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being charming on the internet is impossible! source: i'm an asshole

1 replies 0 reposts 22 likes

heinz beans's avatar heinz beans @heinzbeans.bsky.social
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happy birthday lena wife!!!!!!!!!!!

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

heinz beans's avatar heinz beans @heinzbeans.bsky.social
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sugar, how'd you get so high? tell me sugar how'd you get so high. please can i have some of what you're smoking

0 replies 0 reposts 11 likes

Reposted by heinz beans

Big DeVito Energy's avatar Big DeVito Energy @mayawest.online
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I can be trusted with your tips.. (all tips to paid sites today will be rewarded with treats :3 )

4 replies 26 reposts 89 likes