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Kaleb Horton@kalebhorton.bsky.social |
2436 followers 363 following 117 posts
A writer from Bakersfield, based in Los Angeles. Subscribe to my newsletter: kalebhorton.ghost.io
For work stuff, I'm kaleb.c.horton at gmail.
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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Really not looking forward to when this news cycle almost inevitably gets worse when Jimmy Carter either hits a hundred or dies. May have to throw my laptop in the garbage.
3 replies 0 reposts 13 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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The Sopranos is one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen and I truly feel like the media misrepresented the whole thing the show was.
5 replies 7 reposts 56 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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Great shirt.
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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And it felt like a final album, right down to having that existential closing statement.
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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I wrote about lostwave for my newsletter. kalebhorton.ghost.io/the-most-mys...
1 replies 9 reposts 19 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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I've been doing this with my record collection and it's been interesting to figure out how much stuff I don't want to listen to because I don't want to remember that period of my life or tour it again. I'm constantly hit with this sense of wanting to move forward, make new connections.
1 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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Yeah, the news is absolutely part of it. It just feels like everything is on fire. I've had to seriously limit my news consumption and spend that time, like, playing the New York Times word games or reading about hobbyist topics (lately, my favorite is DB Cooper).
2 replies 0 reposts 3 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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That's exactly it. Depression/anxiety is the most boring thing in the world. It's annoying to talk about it. It's annoying how much of my time it just steals. Nothing interesting happens. The brain tricks I use to fight it are absolutely banal and I have to do them *constantly.*
0 replies 0 reposts 7 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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Dave's a friend and honestly, every time we talk there's a part of me that's just baffled that he actually sat down with a notepad and wrote that song. It's like it always existed. Or like it was conjured.
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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Just me and my wife.
1 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Paul Duane
@paulduane.bsky.social
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He was also a very funny guy, as I heard when someone brought up his love of Cuban cigars & accused him of hypocrisy for being anti-Castro. Kinky said "I don't think of it as buying his cigars, I think of it as burning his fields."
2 replies 2 reposts 11 likes
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Paul Duane
@paulduane.bsky.social
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This is, I would argue, one of the great lyrics of the 1970s.
"Writing out your memoirs on some window in the frost,
Roulette eyes reflecting another morning lost
Hauled in by the Metro for killing time & pain
With the Singin' Brakeman screaming through your brain."
youtu.be/Je3FCWBWeq8?...
1 replies 4 reposts 13 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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My uncle used to go to Kinky Friedman's place every couple years to drink tequila and smoke cigars and I had to work really really hard to pretend I wasn't jealous enough to murder him.
0 replies 1 reposts 25 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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Wrote about cheeseburgers for my newsletter. kalebhorton.ghost.io/california-c...
0 replies 7 reposts 25 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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There's also the idea that writing can somehow be reduced to data sets when a fundamental part of the thing is actual lived experience, and another part is making decisions. If you don't have that you just have a cover song. That's all you'll ever have, no matter how much data you throw at it.
2 replies 12 reposts 175 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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Was listening to a Sixty Minutes segment on AI. The host made it do a short story based on "for sale, baby shoes, never worn" and could not shut up about how good the result was even though it was pure soulless drivel. Think a big key to this racket persisting is not knowing what real writing is.
30 replies 100 reposts 751 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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Really excited to not follow the election because I bet my entire four hundred dollars in savings that this will be a total non-factor in the election. Might as well be asking the candidates their policies on Martians.
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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I'd actually vote for Biden because of just this. Guaranteed vote. Too bad I'm in California and just leave the field blank anyway.
1 replies 0 reposts 5 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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The new entry of my newsletter is up. Please subscribe if you got five bucks to spare. It really helps me keep doing this thing. kalebhorton.ghost.io/on-dreams/
1 replies 11 reposts 17 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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Anybody know the best way to sign a PDF electronically? There are so many scammy options and I haven't found anything that works yet.
3 replies 1 reposts 4 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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I don’t smoke because I enjoy having lungs but 50 years ago I 1000% would have lived on cigarettes.
0 replies 0 reposts 7 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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It’s funny when you’re alone, how quickly your conception of a what a meal is goes out the window. I’m not even convinced I like food in a vacuum. I just wanna hit calorie quotas and not think about it.
1 replies 0 reposts 21 likes
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pixelatedboat aka “mr bluesky”
@pixelatedboat.bsky.social
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Kaleb is one of the great writers of our time and this is a good thing to do with your money
2 replies 12 reposts 39 likes
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Sam
@samgavin.com
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I could read Kaleb on anything and I just paid fifty bucks for the privilege. Get familiar!
1 replies 4 reposts 4 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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Newsletter is up. Please subscribe if you have five bucks you don't know what to do with. It'll make me keep doing this. kalebhorton.ghost.io/perihelion-a...
1 replies 24 reposts 49 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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Also has incredible photography of Detroit, and some of the best grimy dive bar stuff ever. Smoky windowless wood-paneled perfection.
0 replies 0 reposts 18 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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It's on Criterion now. Catch it while you can because I've always had trouble finding it.
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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Saw Blue Collar for the first time last night. Awesome movie and Pryor is hilarious in it. Every single frame smells like cocaine sweat but it's a feature, not a bug.
6 replies 1 reposts 59 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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Will have a newsletter up in the next couple days. May finally have a gig lined up, so fingers crossed. Not a job, but could potentially bail me out for the summer.
1 replies 0 reposts 18 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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I saw so many guys try to do what he does at youth group and camp events, and I thought it was a humiliating niche nobody could ever get out of. His career is like watching Holzhauer crack $100k on Jeopardy.
0 replies 0 reposts 10 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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James Austin Johnson rules, not because he was the first guy to crack a *real* Trump impression or even because he has decade-by-decade Bob Dylan impressions, but because he’s so clearly from a Christian comedy background and doesn’t hide from it at all.
2 replies 1 reposts 28 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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This as opposed to Springsteen, who seems to have weirdly terrible judgment with production. Wrecking Ball has some sick songs on it but the overall sound of the thing is brickwalled, pointlessly bombastic garbage.
0 replies 0 reposts 4 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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I listen to Petty's radio show all the time as background noise and I'm confident that he wanted to sound like the best or at least hardest gigging 50s/60s band ever. That was the only priority, so there aren't eras. Ups and downs with drugs but he was hellbent on sounding like it was 1968.
2 replies 0 reposts 8 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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Had coffee with a friend who had never seen a Cybertruck. I pointed out one passing by and he briefly had the purest look of disgust and anger I’ve seen in my whole life.
1 replies 2 reposts 42 likes
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Ian Boudreau
@iboudreau.bsky.social
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I'm glad we finally got DMs here
51 replies 286 reposts 2044 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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Too damn heavy. That’s a dying man right there.
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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Just watched a truly insane horrible 60s comedy with Marie where, and this is exactly true, Robert Mitchum dies from jerking off a bull. He jerks off a bull and he dies.
4 replies 1 reposts 28 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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I'll probably do the D*lbert strips as my first premium post whenever that rolls around, just so bozos can't find it and say bozo stuff to me about it.
0 replies 0 reposts 5 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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Gotta wrap up travel and job hunt stuff, but I'm gonna put out an essay for the newsletter this week. Also found all the assets for my Big Bang Theory spec, so I'll repost that soon, but I'm gonna wait a bit because I refuse to have two articles in a row open with the word "Big."
1 replies 0 reposts 5 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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Back in Los Angeles! #la
0 replies 0 reposts 11 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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Two most annoying stock post formats: 1) there was a day when your dad picked you up and spun you around and never did again, and 2) we’re closer in time to Cleopatra than Cleopatra was to dinosaurs landing on the moon or whatever. Who cares, go outside and take a walk.
6 replies 15 reposts 148 likes
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RJ “Quantity Over Quality" White
@rjwhite.bsky.social
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Years ago, I loved this guy’s writing and then actually gasped when I heard from a friend how young he was and already so confident and accomplished and relaxed in his material. Subscribe!
1 replies 2 reposts 10 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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Big news week, so I wrote about fish. kalebhorton.ghost.io/big-fish-not...
1 replies 7 reposts 26 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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Yeah, FOX just never comes off in our house until primetime is over, and after that it’s just stuff endorsed by FOX in one way or another. It’s an addiction.
0 replies 0 reposts 6 likes
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David_j_roth
@davidjroth.bsky.social
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One of the very best we've got. I'm subscribing to this and recommend you do it, too, if you are into reading.
0 replies 7 reposts 39 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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I just launched my newsletter: kalebhorton.ghost.io
If anybody has any tips on things like enabling subscribers/payment mechanisms etc., I’d appreciate it. I still find the dashboard pretty unintuitive.
6 replies 31 reposts 71 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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Also, if you're with Aidvantage, I recommend doing this over the phone with an agent because doing it on the internet by yourself sucks and I'm not convinced the site works in the way it's supposed to. I even had to answer a few questions "wrong" per the agent's advice.
0 replies 0 reposts 3 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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Thanks for all the tips, everybody. After a long time banging my head against the wall, I successfully applied for everything I can apply for and got my monthly payment to zero. I'll leave these posts up for anybody else who needs help because there's solid advice.
1 replies 1 reposts 27 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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Long shot, but does anybody know anything about getting out of student loans in 2024? I keep hearing about Biden doing stuff but have no idea how it works. All I know is I haven't really worked in two years and imagine I'd qualify for any damn thing that's available.
7 replies 17 reposts 46 likes
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Kaleb Horton
@kalebhorton.bsky.social
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I’m talking about the Harry Dean movie, not the horse show.
1 replies 0 reposts 0 likes