🦖 Twinklecup ☄️ Slithersby 🦜

Memento Morty 🌙 @mortythenurse.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 16, 2024 at 23:30 UTC

hopefully you're a better dad than this guy happy father's day

6 replies 38 reposts 216 likes

🦖 Twinklecup ☄️ Slithersby 🦜 @twinklecrepe.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 16, 2024 at 17:55 UTC

Are there any other slurs for straight people other than "breeder"? I don't want people to mistake my heterophobia for misogyny

0 replies 1 reposts 0 likes

🦖 Twinklecup ☄️ Slithersby 🦜 @twinklecrepe.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 15, 2024 at 17:21 UTC

I wonder if it's legal to catch European starlings and keep them as pets, since they're an invasive species

0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

🦖 Twinklecup ☄️ Slithersby 🦜 @twinklecrepe.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 14, 2024 at 05:44 UTC

Lol I'm curious whether that's someone anyone gives an actual shit about or if he just thought it would sound appealing to his idiotic base because BUY AMERICAN, YEEHAW or whatever

2 replies 0 reposts 11 likes

🦖 Twinklecup ☄️ Slithersby 🦜 @twinklecrepe.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 14, 2024 at 05:31 UTC

This might sound mean-spirited, but when something is ugly in a hilarious way like that, I kind of hope people never figure out it's unflattering. I want people to take stupid fashion risks and look ridiculous, it makes life so much more fun than if everyone has good taste all the time lol

1 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

🦖 Twinklecup ☄️ Slithersby 🦜 @twinklecrepe.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 14, 2024 at 05:19 UTC

It looks like part of a flower costume from a kindergarten play

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

🦖 Twinklecup ☄️ Slithersby 🦜 @twinklecrepe.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 14, 2024 at 05:00 UTC

Maybe my doctors were wrong about me, because I have absolutely asked people questions to humiliate them before

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

🦖 Twinklecup ☄️ Slithersby 🦜 @twinklecrepe.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 13, 2024 at 12:45 UTC

I wish the sapphic pride flag were literally any other combination of colors

0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

🦖 Twinklecup ☄️ Slithersby 🦜 @twinklecrepe.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 11, 2024 at 12:53 UTC

Okay, I'm done fuming about arguably the worst people on the fucking planet now lol

0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

🦖 Twinklecup ☄️ Slithersby 🦜 @twinklecrepe.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 11, 2024 at 12:50 UTC

I guess it doesn't really matter how objectively pathetic these people are because they are all lying to themselves non-stop anyway. There's no way to make them feel shame because they have built-in defenses to protect them from cognitive dissonance in case they ever have a single self-aware thought

1 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

🦖 Twinklecup ☄️ Slithersby 🦜 @twinklecrepe.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 11, 2024 at 12:46 UTC

Nothing inspires violent urges like an abusive man shedding crocodile tears

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

🦖 Twinklecup ☄️ Slithersby 🦜 @twinklecrepe.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 11, 2024 at 12:45 UTC

Or like, this girl's bf quasi-kidnapped her & destroyed a bunch of her stuff to punish her. Apparently he can't keep a job for shit. His response to being dumped: "HOW WILL I PAY MY BILLS? I HAVE NOWHERE TO GO 🥺" IDK maybe u should've thought of that before abusing your gf who's supporting you lmfao

1 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

🦖 Twinklecup ☄️ Slithersby 🦜 @twinklecrepe.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 11, 2024 at 12:24 UTC

Like, I'm not gonna name any names, but I gotta say, if you're pushing 50 and still throw honest-to-god tantrums AND you have a dick the size of a tampon? It's like you're BEGGING to be compared to a literal infant. But you know, go ahead. Be abusive. I bet it'll never catch up with you!

1 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

🦖 Twinklecup ☄️ Slithersby 🦜 @twinklecrepe.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 11, 2024 at 11:41 UTC

It's so wild how abusers are always deeply, intensely pathetic. I will eat my hat if there is a single person on earth who abuses their romantic partner and doesn't have some truly fucking MORTIFYING skeletons in their closet. Or like, on their front lawn, 20' tall, dressed up in a seasonal costume

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

🦖 Twinklecup ☄️ Slithersby 🦜 @twinklecrepe.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 08, 2024 at 22:19 UTC

I fucking love Klaus Nomi

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

🦖 Twinklecup ☄️ Slithersby 🦜 @twinklecrepe.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 08, 2024 at 21:38 UTC

Update: apparently mulberry trees can grow to be up to 70 feet tall, so that probably explains why this thing has grown about 8 feet in the past year

0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

🦖 Twinklecup ☄️ Slithersby 🦜 @twinklecrepe.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 08, 2024 at 21:24 UTC

A huge mulberry bush the size of a baby tree has mysteriously appeared in my backyard. I'm pretty sure a bird did it

1 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

🦖 Twinklecup ☄️ Slithersby 🦜 @twinklecrepe.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 08, 2024 at 19:53 UTC

The IKEA shark is cute and all, but I like the octopus better

0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

🦖 Twinklecup ☄️ Slithersby 🦜 @twinklecrepe.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 08, 2024 at 17:38 UTC

I fucking hate nightmares

0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

🦖 Twinklecup ☄️ Slithersby 🦜 @twinklecrepe.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 03, 2024 at 08:23 UTC

what if they change the abbreviation for "charisma" to RIZ in the next edition of D&D

0 replies 2 reposts 12 likes

🦖 Twinklecup ☄️ Slithersby 🦜 @twinklecrepe.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 03, 2024 at 08:23 UTC

what if they change the abbreviation for "charisma" to RIZ in the next edition of D&D

0 replies 2 reposts 12 likes

🦖 Twinklecup ☄️ Slithersby 🦜 @twinklecrepe.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 02, 2024 at 05:41 UTC

Depends how scary sounding your voice is

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

🦖 Twinklecup ☄️ Slithersby 🦜 @twinklecrepe.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 02, 2024 at 05:38 UTC

I recently saw an AI illustration that hid the crazy looking hands by drawing everyone in the picture with their hands in their pockets. It looked like the product of someone dosing a middle school art class with peyote

0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

🦖 Twinklecup ☄️ Slithersby 🦜 @twinklecrepe.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 02, 2024 at 05:23 UTC

Lace weight yarn is a BITCH to work with 💀

0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

🦖 Twinklecup ☄️ Slithersby 🦜 @twinklecrepe.bsky.social [ View ] May 29, 2024 at 06:39 UTC

admittedly, exhausted is better than drowning in despair or simmering with barely-suppressed rage every waking moment. I'm at the "fuck it, who cares about anything" stage of trauma I guess

0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

🦖 Twinklecup ☄️ Slithersby 🦜 @twinklecrepe.bsky.social [ View ] May 29, 2024 at 06:36 UTC

honestly I don't want anyone to be in love with me right now. I just want people to like me a normal amount and mostly leave me alone. I'm fucking exhausted and I still can't trust anybody like that. I don't know when that's going to change

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

🦖 Twinklecup ☄️ Slithersby 🦜 @twinklecrepe.bsky.social [ View ] May 29, 2024 at 06:28 UTC

I sincerely don't understand what it is about me that keeps inspiring my friends to fall obsessively in love with me

1 replies 0 reposts 3 likes

🦖 Twinklecup ☄️ Slithersby 🦜 @twinklecrepe.bsky.social [ View ] May 25, 2024 at 20:30 UTC

I just found a 4-leaf clover and a 6-leaf clover (the latter of which I think is actually two clovers growing out of one stem) 🍀

0 replies 0 reposts 3 likes

🦖 Twinklecup ☄️ Slithersby 🦜 @twinklecrepe.bsky.social [ View ] May 25, 2024 at 18:17 UTC

My mental health is unbelievably better now than it was a few months ago. I still don't feel like interacting with people too much, but I'm feeling a lot more at peace and having much less trouble dealing with stressful events

0 replies 0 reposts 5 likes

🦖 Twinklecup ☄️ Slithersby 🦜 @twinklecrepe.bsky.social [ View ] May 23, 2024 at 10:59 UTC

I was too depressed last summer to go see Sisters of Mercy, but miraculously, it looks like there's gonna be another US tour this year. I feel like I HAVE to go now that I'm being given a second chance

0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

🦖 Twinklecup ☄️ Slithersby 🦜 @twinklecrepe.bsky.social [ View ] May 18, 2024 at 12:06 UTC

The Original Pancake House is sort of close, but I feel like a international house of pancakes that truly lived up to its name would have dosas and okonomiyaki and the like

0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

🦖 Twinklecup ☄️ Slithersby 🦜 @twinklecrepe.bsky.social [ View ] May 18, 2024 at 11:50 UTC

Hey everybody, check out this cool cephalopod phys.org/news/2024-05...

0 replies 0 reposts 3 likes

🦖 Twinklecup ☄️ Slithersby 🦜 @twinklecrepe.bsky.social [ View ] May 16, 2024 at 23:07 UTC

Old school as in "I found a bag of Halloween candy from 1995 in my basement, and this is what the chocolate tasted like," I presume

0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes