I have to explain my jokes's avatar

I have to explain my jokes

@mikeauld.bsky.social

78 followers 91 following 816 posts

Likes: bad puns, old tv, comedy, music. Freeze Derek Nimmo and animate the vegetables. Dislikes: bad karma. Is it a dolphin in a bathtub?

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Chris Orton's avatar Chris Orton @chriso1.bsky.social
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Oh Dear Oh Dear Oh Dear On Her Majesty’s Secret Service.

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I have to explain my jokes's avatar I have to explain my jokes @mikeauld.bsky.social
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Went to Austentatious at Regents Park Open Air Theatre in 2022. The performance started a little late, the live band began playing football music, as news of the Lionesses Euro victory swept through a distracted audience. It was fabulous. However much everyone hates Corden, this was the right call.

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I have to explain my jokes's avatar I have to explain my jokes @mikeauld.bsky.social
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U Can’t See Me…anymore

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I have to explain my jokes's avatar I have to explain my jokes @mikeauld.bsky.social
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He must be gutted at losing so badly.

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I have to explain my jokes's avatar I have to explain my jokes @mikeauld.bsky.social
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The Secret Harden

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I have to explain my jokes's avatar I have to explain my jokes @mikeauld.bsky.social
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Nipkins Mr Bent Doctor Why Emo’s World Storybonk International Go With Norkes

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I have to explain my jokes's avatar I have to explain my jokes @mikeauld.bsky.social
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Magyar way to the exit.

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I have to explain my jokes's avatar I have to explain my jokes @mikeauld.bsky.social
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Blur Peter Scooby Poo The Amazing World of Bumball Going Lice

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I have to explain my jokes's avatar I have to explain my jokes @mikeauld.bsky.social
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There is lots and lots of things for the new government to put right and probably higher priority. That said, they also must fully release the details of that Russia report - which was swept away and redacted in the height of covid back in July 2020.

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I have to explain my jokes's avatar I have to explain my jokes @mikeauld.bsky.social
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Felt sorry for ITV. No one watching of course, but they did the right thing. Rather than build up to the Holland Turkey game, they showed highlights from yesterday then some brief team news, then by that time it was the pens. Which they covered Soccer Saturday style. Actually really good to watch!

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Equium 🦊|🐰 Yardley's avatar Equium 🦊|🐰 Yardley @blueno.se
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Since Starmer became PM, British F1 drivers have qualified 1-2-3 at the British GP for the first time ever, and England have actually won a penalty shoot-out. Labour fixing things already.

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I have to explain my jokes's avatar I have to explain my jokes @mikeauld.bsky.social
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Noel Fielding for me.

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I have to explain my jokes's avatar I have to explain my jokes @mikeauld.bsky.social
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If Spain win the Euros, the big toy this Christmas will be the “Tackle Me Olmo”

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I have to explain my jokes's avatar I have to explain my jokes @mikeauld.bsky.social
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Anyone for Eddie Currents?

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I have to explain my jokes's avatar I have to explain my jokes @mikeauld.bsky.social
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Energy is now measured in Milibands.

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I have to explain my jokes's avatar I have to explain my jokes @mikeauld.bsky.social
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Germany have gone from bad to Wurtz. More jokes later.

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Pete 🟥🟦's avatar Pete 🟥🟦 @sarf-london.bsky.social
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After being unceremoniously dumped by disgruntled voters, Penny Mordaunt lands a job that matches her skills in the real world.

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I have to explain my jokes's avatar I have to explain my jokes @mikeauld.bsky.social
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ITV trailed their football coverage at 3.30pm, with Mark Pougatch previewing Spain Germany. Over a music bed of “goddamright it’s a beautiful day”. Contrast this with the previous “Never Ending Tory” theme they usually play. Yes, it’s a changing of the guard :)

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I have to explain my jokes's avatar I have to explain my jokes @mikeauld.bsky.social
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Pretty sure Jon Kay just referenced indirectly this picture:)

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I have to explain my jokes's avatar I have to explain my jokes @mikeauld.bsky.social
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Everytime I see that Election graphic…

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Stephen Gallagher's avatar Stephen Gallagher @brooligan.bsky.social
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Sorry, good people of Clacton

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I have to explain my jokes's avatar I have to explain my jokes @mikeauld.bsky.social
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PETER YOU’VE LOST THE SWINDON DECLARATION

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Mark Chadbourn's avatar Mark Chadbourn @chadbourn.bsky.social
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Four Reform seats is four too many. But to be second in so many is particularly worrying. No one should be complacent. #UKGE2024 3/3

15 replies 22 reposts 168 likes

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Neil Miles's avatar Neil Miles @neilsmiles.bsky.social
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HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA (1/∞)

1 replies 3 reposts 26 likes

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Jonny Morris's avatar Jonny Morris @jonnymorris.bsky.social
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I don't want to see former Tory MPs on Strictly, in the Jungle, playing Traitors, hosting panel shows, or making travelogues or documentaries. I never want to see their smug, shiny faces again. I want them all to fuck permanently off.

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waltydunlop's avatar waltydunlop @waltydunlop.bsky.social
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The count tipping past 326 at the EXACT moment Rees-Mogg lost. That's perfect.

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I have to explain my jokes's avatar I have to explain my jokes @mikeauld.bsky.social
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Moggone!!!!

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Casmilus's avatar Casmilus @casmilus.bsky.social
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Johnny Mercer. That's something to write about in the Plymouth Herald.

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I have to explain my jokes's avatar I have to explain my jokes @mikeauld.bsky.social
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IDS the top pick in Chingford…eugh

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Neil Miles's avatar Neil Miles @neilsmiles.bsky.social
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That's about 5 MPs the Conservatives have lost there

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I have to explain my jokes's avatar I have to explain my jokes @mikeauld.bsky.social
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Super majority there in Shapps constituency.

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I have to explain my jokes's avatar I have to explain my jokes @mikeauld.bsky.social
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Shapps vote split into all his previous pseudonyms.

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I have to explain my jokes's avatar I have to explain my jokes @mikeauld.bsky.social
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State of the Parties:

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I have to explain my jokes's avatar I have to explain my jokes @mikeauld.bsky.social
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Current State of the Parties:

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I have to explain my jokes's avatar I have to explain my jokes @mikeauld.bsky.social
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Staying up for…

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I have to explain my jokes's avatar I have to explain my jokes @mikeauld.bsky.social
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Those were incredible classy speeches from Swindon. Qdos to Heidi and especially Robert too.

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I have to explain my jokes's avatar I have to explain my jokes @mikeauld.bsky.social
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BBC just missed Swindon declaration. It’s just like 1979 again ;)

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I have to explain my jokes's avatar I have to explain my jokes @mikeauld.bsky.social
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Penny Mordaunt going postal if she loses her seat is a bit scary. She’s got a knife.

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Mark Gibbings-Jones's avatar Mark Gibbings-Jones @brokentv.bsky.social
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Tee-hee. Greg Cock.

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I have to explain my jokes's avatar I have to explain my jokes @mikeauld.bsky.social
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This guy loved hexagons too.

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waltydunlop's avatar waltydunlop @waltydunlop.bsky.social
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Jeremy Vine's really bloody going for it.

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I have to explain my jokes's avatar I have to explain my jokes @mikeauld.bsky.social
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Can I use the TOTP skeetalong tropes now :) <hornyjail.gif>

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Mark Gibbings-Jones's avatar Mark Gibbings-Jones @brokentv.bsky.social
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Ah, imagine if we lived in a world where the BBC had the money for BBC2: 9.30pm Look Around You: Election Special.

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I have to explain my jokes's avatar I have to explain my jokes @mikeauld.bsky.social
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“We weren’t fascistic enough” “People were telling me to…” (fill in the blanks)

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