Southern Violet

Chris Hayes @chrislhayes.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 19:01 UTC

“Look, folks. There are no “gooner states” and “edging states”, we are the United States!” <wild applause>

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Southern Violet @southernviolet.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 22:00 UTC

Yuuuup same

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Southern Violet @southernviolet.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 21:48 UTC

But they are also sorta public organizations because someone at some point made the case that hey maybe people would like a say over who they vote for so the general vs being chosen by people in the back room so party member = anyone 18+*. *some exceptions apply, see state election site for details

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Southern Violet @southernviolet.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 21:43 UTC

That describes every major area of law tbh and the SCOTUS just made it worse.

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Southern Violet @southernviolet.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 15:55 UTC

Yes, and, frankly that's the opposite of wasteful. It's how I ended up with seven vapes and five lip balms but hey. Extras for when I lose them again.

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Southern Violet @southernviolet.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 15:53 UTC

Yeah I've been doing this since I lived a continent away, it's difficult but not impossible. Hah thank you. Still have some brick walls, but have found a trove of cool shit.

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Southern Violet @southernviolet.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 14:10 UTC

For me cuz my parents and teachers screamed at me when I tried to do that. Took me YEARS to just buy three bottles of Tylenol and seven device cords and two sets of everything I use all the time and put them where I need them.

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Southern Violet @southernviolet.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 13:55 UTC

Oh yeah I have three bottles of pain pills. One in my room, one on my desk, one in the living room. Screw being in pain.

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Southern Violet @southernviolet.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 13:54 UTC

Yes! And when I move trash cans near me so I don't forget to throw stuff away, don't then yell I'm lazy and move it. Then yell at me for being messy. Ugh. Story of my life.

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Southern Violet @southernviolet.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 13:42 UTC

Ah, I missed you were talking about someone specific, clearly need coffee here. Yes, if someone specific told me grooming is meaningful for them, I'd use it. That's just polite. In general, though, yeah.

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Southern Violet @southernviolet.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 13:35 UTC

That's one way. I think it's also valid to say pick a word for adult manipulation. It doesn't really matter. Call one grooming and then other grossing. The point im making and people are reading past is that we need more than one term. Who cares what it is.

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Southern Violet @southernviolet.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 13:33 UTC

I am a victim. I just simply have nuance and got some help - which you don't beliece I so of course you're being an ass.

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Southern Violet @southernviolet.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 13:32 UTC

Well, I'll stick to no idea of my story, having no reading comprehension, and putting vile things I never said and don't believe in my mouth. Which aren't the actions of a healthy person.

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Southern Violet @southernviolet.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 13:31 UTC

WAT

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Southern Violet @southernviolet.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 13:31 UTC

He acknowledged inappropriate consensual relationships. She's describing rape. Two different and icky things. Source and context always matter.

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Southern Violet @southernviolet.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 13:30 UTC

The reasons that happens are complex and boil down to patriarchy and power. Which creates hair triggers like yours. You have no idea of my story and are absolutely putting words on my mouth. The way you are doing so is textbook PTSD. Get some help.

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Southern Violet @southernviolet.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 13:28 UTC

Uh Clearly you haven't read any of what I said if you think "what she's describing is rape" is victim blaming. I'm saying we need to be clear about language b/c doing so is helpful to all victims. You care about feeling morally superior not helping victims or you wouldn't be berating one right now.

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Southern Violet @southernviolet.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 13:25 UTC

yeah thanks intimately familiar with what grooming actually means. But clearly we need another term now for adult to child manipulation. To be clear, I wasn't saying coercive and abusive manipulation doesn't exist in adult relationships. I've seen it. Im saying we need a different word for it.

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Southern Violet @southernviolet.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 13:23 UTC

Grooming was the term for the beginning of a CSA relationship but it's gotten coopted and no longer is useful. So yes, I'd love a different term for either that or adult to adult coercion and manipulation. There is definitely a language gap here.

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Southern Violet @southernviolet.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 13:21 UTC

Yeah I know. I'm saying differentiation between the different kinds of power makes it easier for victims to get help and justice. But clearly you just care about your preconceived ideas and aren't really interested in listening.

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Southern Violet @southernviolet.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 13:08 UTC

No, not grooming if she's 20. That I strongly push back on. That refers to one specific thing: adult males convincing children sex acts are fine. She's an adult. You can say he committed rape without muddying the waters on child sex abuse. And yes employer/employee is coercive.

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Southern Violet @southernviolet.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 12:57 UTC

Thanks, I didn't see that. Yeah that's definitely concerning.

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Southern Violet @southernviolet.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 12:56 UTC

Hm so you made up every word yourself in your sentence did ya? I used it because it's a fun word. Not everything has a Deeper Meaning dude.

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Southern Violet @southernviolet.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 12:56 UTC

The allegations even said that btw. They were specifically alleging that several rough sex encounters wasn't consensual which, if true, is definitely rape. And will be in some other paper by the end of the day if there's anything really going on.

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Southern Violet @southernviolet.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 12:53 UTC

He confirmed consensual relationships. Legally, everyone is an adult. I find the age difference sus/creepy but that's not the same as rape or abuse, and definitely not grooming. it's important to actual victims to keep those distinctions. I think less of him? Sure. Say he's a criminal? Nope.

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Southern Violet @southernviolet.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 12:47 UTC

If the worst person I knew told me that, I'd go see for myself or ask a trusted source to go see before I believed it then, too.

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Southern Violet @southernviolet.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 12:46 UTC

Uh, no. I'm asking a question. No one's arguing your abuse is your abuse. I'm arguing that this age gap isn't always abuse. But I see you're gonna be like that about it so bye.

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