Patton Oswalt's avatar

Patton Oswalt

@pattonoswalt.bsky.social

79992 followers 252 following 149 posts

Writing and yelling.

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Shiv Ramdas's avatar Shiv Ramdas @nameshiv.bsky.social
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"you're not American why do you care about the 4th of July" mate I'm Indian, any day someone got the Brits to fuck off back to their country is a national holiday for me

65 replies 593 reposts 4615 likes

Patton Oswalt's avatar Patton Oswalt @pattonoswalt.bsky.social
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THE LAND OF LAUGHS changed… a LOT of stuff for me.

5 replies 6 reposts 56 likes

Patton Oswalt's avatar Patton Oswalt @pattonoswalt.bsky.social
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“I battle wit’ Natskis And punchk papparatskis I’m Sean Penn the Actor Man🎶”

11 replies 30 reposts 376 likes

Patton Oswalt's avatar Patton Oswalt @pattonoswalt.bsky.social
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What my grandpa yells when he sits on his balls.

25 replies 73 reposts 1196 likes

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◍'s avatar ◍ @smilingnodding.bsky.social
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seeing a cybertruck in the wild is fun bc only 3000 have been sold so its like oh wow theres our towns Biggest Dipshit. look at him go!

133 replies 847 reposts 4295 likes

Patton Oswalt's avatar Patton Oswalt @pattonoswalt.bsky.social
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PATTON OSWALT AND FRIENDS is back all summer long at The Largo! Amazing guests, BIG surprises! Tickets onsale now. See you soon?

9 replies 9 reposts 132 likes

Patton Oswalt's avatar Patton Oswalt @pattonoswalt.bsky.social
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THREE DAYS!!! The 1% Club premieres on FOX this Monday, June 3rd (and the following day on Amazon Prime!) Don’t miss it!

9 replies 2 reposts 111 likes

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Christy, Butlerian Jihadist's avatar Christy, Butlerian Jihadist @birdsaredinosaurs.bsky.social
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The timeline right now looks like an Ewok party after the Death Star exploded

96 replies 1635 reposts 6878 likes

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Osita Nwanevu's avatar Osita Nwanevu @ositanwanevu.bsky.social
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The only people who've ever held Trump meaningfully accountable over the last nine years have been ordinary Americans and they've spent that entire time being lectured to and berated by elites who've failed to do anything.

45 replies 2063 reposts 7134 likes

Patton Oswalt's avatar Patton Oswalt @pattonoswalt.bsky.social
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See you guys in an hour! One of my fave bookstores on the planet!!!

2 replies 5 reposts 61 likes

Patton Oswalt's avatar Patton Oswalt @pattonoswalt.bsky.social
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My mutant ability is, no matter how empty a Starbucks, the instant I enter the restroom and lock the door I summon a handle-rattling human with a bursting bladder.

30 replies 13 reposts 432 likes

Patton Oswalt's avatar Patton Oswalt @pattonoswalt.bsky.social
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New show poster from the ALWAYS wonderful Ridge Rooms for my Friday, June 14th show at Humphrey’s in San Diego!

5 replies 7 reposts 145 likes

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David Avallone's avatar David Avallone @davallone.bsky.social
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When people tell me they hate LA, I know exactly where they hang out, and who with… and, honestly, I pity them. It’s a great, vast city with a vibrant culture and a tiny minority of douchebags. I have found them pretty easy to avoid. And every big city in the world has those people.

11 replies 16 reposts 160 likes

Patton Oswalt's avatar Patton Oswalt @pattonoswalt.bsky.social
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THE NEW BETTY FORD STAMPS ARE HERE!!!

33 replies 12 reposts 325 likes

Patton Oswalt's avatar Patton Oswalt @pattonoswalt.bsky.social
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The new MINOR THREATS drops today!!! Come say hi tonight at SECRET HEADQUARTERS in Atwater Village and this Saturday at Earth 2 Comics in Sherman Oaks!!!

1 replies 4 reposts 49 likes

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Jordan Blum's avatar Jordan Blum @blumjordan.bsky.social
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Tonight @pattonoswalt.bsky.social and I will be on the Revenge Of livestream talking Minor Threats (out tomorrow) and giving away the chance to win free comics for a year! Not a hoax! Not a dream! Free comics!!!!

2 replies 5 reposts 16 likes

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Patton Oswalt's avatar Patton Oswalt @pattonoswalt.bsky.social
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See you guys Wednesday night at the fabulous SECRET HEADQUARTERS Comic Shop! We’re signing Issue 1 of MINOR THREATS and anything else you bring (no body parts please)

1 replies 7 reposts 60 likes

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blaine capatch's avatar blaine capatch @blainecapatch.bsky.social
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The Cat With Hands I saw this years ago in Annecy at the International Animation Festival, the audience wasn't expecting it and they actually got kind of angry

22 replies 48 reposts 155 likes

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Reposted by Patton Oswalt

Reposted by Patton Oswalt

Clayton Oppenhuizen 's avatar Clayton Oppenhuizen @csoppenhuizen.bsky.social
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I stand by the assertion that we live in the time-line @pattonoswalt.bsky.social joked about in the early 00s. Wherein we've run out of reality and a white horizon awaits us unless screenwriters draft the most insane reality. We then consume entertainment like "man eats cereal."

3 replies 14 reposts 110 likes

Patton Oswalt's avatar Patton Oswalt @pattonoswalt.bsky.social
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Every ghost they’ve ever caught will be unleashed. GHOSTBUSTERS: FROZEN EMPIRE, only in theaters Friday, March 22nd!

13 replies 17 reposts 219 likes

Patton Oswalt's avatar Patton Oswalt @pattonoswalt.bsky.social
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I don’t always hang in a stance. But when I do, I prefer Buffalo.

34 replies 21 reposts 371 likes

Patton Oswalt's avatar Patton Oswalt @pattonoswalt.bsky.social
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Nothing against Strawberry Alarm Clock, Vanilla Fudge or The Chocolate Watchband but to me the height of psychedelic rock was always

18 replies 13 reposts 264 likes

Patton Oswalt's avatar Patton Oswalt @pattonoswalt.bsky.social
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You HAVEN’T pre-ordered your copy of REBEL GIRL, Kathleen Hanna’s upcoming memoir?!?!? Get over to bookshop.org and FIX YOUR LIFE.

8 replies 17 reposts 140 likes

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Patton Oswalt's avatar Patton Oswalt @pattonoswalt.bsky.social
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Volume 2 is gonna be sooooooo good. Take a sneak peek at Issue 1 here!

1 replies 3 reposts 76 likes

Patton Oswalt's avatar Patton Oswalt @pattonoswalt.bsky.social
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Bring in yer car, don’t be a pussy!

22 replies 17 reposts 406 likes

Patton Oswalt's avatar Patton Oswalt @pattonoswalt.bsky.social
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LOW TICKET ALERT! My show next Wednesday, February 21st at the Wheeler Opera House for the Aspen Laugh Festival is almost sold out! Grab a ticket and I’ll see you there! A brand new hour and hot toddies!

1 replies 1 reposts 52 likes

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Reposted by Patton Oswalt

Zach Rabiroff's avatar Zach Rabiroff @zachrabiroff.bsky.social
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Easily the most money someone named Kirby has ever made on the Fantastic Four.

23 replies 321 reposts 1063 likes

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Coach Finstock's avatar Coach Finstock @coachfinstock.bsky.social
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Would you like to try our ayahuasca riblets?

41 replies 290 reposts 1873 likes

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Gail Simone's avatar Gail Simone @gailsimone.bsky.social
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I was told my whole life I could never be a writer. I believed those voices and became a hairdresser. But I still wrote stuff, to amuse myself and others. People liked that stuff. I got my dream job. Don’t give up because others have.

58 replies 300 reposts 2090 likes

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mattie lubchansky's avatar mattie lubchansky @lubchansky.bsky.social
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i obviously do not give a shit about the approval of cis people but listen. a middle aged lady with a very thick queens accent pulling me aside and saying “looking good baby” in a pack a day voice….simply cannot be beaten

36 replies 111 reposts 2236 likes

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Paul Frazee's avatar Paul Frazee @pfrazee.com
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my neck, my back, but mainly it’s my back

11 replies 95 reposts 730 likes

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William Bibbiani's avatar William Bibbiani @williambibbiani.bsky.social
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I am always amazed by people who try to add context to a conversation, but the context is so broad, all it does is absolve them from caring. “We should try to preserve this art!” “Did you know that lots of art doesn’t get preserved?” Jesus, yes, we know. That’s why we want to preserve it.

5 replies 23 reposts 185 likes