patrick

josh (oldfriend99) @oldfriend99.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 05, 2024 at 19:28 UTC

If i was Dracula i wouldn't be able to look at myself in the mirror

3 replies 1 reposts 64 likes

patrick @partnardy.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 05, 2024 at 17:23 UTC

so you're telling me the new uk prime minister is some guy who starms all the time?

1 replies 0 reposts 4 likes

patrick @partnardy.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 05, 2024 at 16:59 UTC

just invented project 2026. shits so much better

1 replies 2 reposts 21 likes

patrick @partnardy.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 05, 2024 at 16:24 UTC

it’s a Barney rubble in the lorry for those Tory tossers

0 replies 0 reposts 3 likes

patrick @partnardy.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 05, 2024 at 15:46 UTC

absolutely incredible guy in the latest swan boy

0 replies 0 reposts 6 likes

patrick @partnardy.bsky.social [ View ] Sep 13, 2023 at 01:51 UTC

Capitalization is the difference between helping your uncle suck off a horse and Helping Your Uncle Suck Off A Horse

1 replies 12 reposts 46 likes

patrick @partnardy.bsky.social [ View ] Aug 16, 2023 at 03:25 UTC

Found the ideal gun for taking care of all the witnesses

1 replies 9 reposts 72 likes

patrick @partnardy.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 20, 2023 at 17:45 UTC

Whenever you walk by your router you should point at it and say "thats where my homies from online live"

6 replies 140 reposts 531 likes

patrick @partnardy.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 05, 2024 at 14:09 UTC

lol i would enjoy nothing more than to read a hilarious story of rich freaks secretly complaining that the president is completely mentally gone but holy shit olivia nuzzi is such a bad writer i had to bail halfway through

0 replies 0 reposts 6 likes

patrick @partnardy.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 05, 2024 at 04:04 UTC

handing your friend a $20 bill with a note on it that says “you aren’t allowed to spend this if you don’t know the actor who played Quarles on Justified.”

1 replies 2 reposts 4 likes

patrick @partnardy.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 05, 2024 at 03:56 UTC

hint: the cold hard stuff. greenbacks. simoleons

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

patrick @partnardy.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 05, 2024 at 03:49 UTC

real money receivers know

1 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

patrick @partnardy.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 05, 2024 at 03:37 UTC

dude what did you just call me

1 replies 1 reposts 10 likes

patrick @partnardy.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 05, 2024 at 02:39 UTC

they had to shut down the project after all their shape memory alloy and weed went missing

0 replies 0 reposts 4 likes

patrick @partnardy.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 05, 2024 at 02:34 UTC

I had a buddy who did some stuff with the canadian space agency and sometimes he’d bring around pieces of a shape memory alloy and we’d get stoned and bend the wire and then heat it with our lighters and it would magically straighten itself back out. Anyway we could totally have self-folding laundry

1 replies 2 reposts 18 likes

patrick @partnardy.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 05, 2024 at 00:28 UTC

🎵 Well I’ve never had to knock on wood butt I know someone who has 🎶

1 replies 0 reposts 3 likes

patrick @partnardy.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 19:17 UTC

enver hoxha: da main boss of "keeping it real"

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

patrick @partnardy.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 19:08 UTC

Why don’t they just build the fireworks out of dogs. Two bird stones

0 replies 0 reposts 6 likes

patrick @partnardy.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 18:45 UTC

All I have to trade is my lucky $10,000 bill and another slightly less lucky $10,000 bill.

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

patrick @partnardy.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 18:41 UTC

starting a leftist alternative to Wordle so as to avoid giving clicks to the New YorKKK Times, making the first answer “Hoxha” and folding the website hours later after a series of denunciations by the team running Maoist Connections

1 replies 5 reposts 28 likes

patrick @partnardy.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 18:37 UTC

You’re really getting on here to say a guy who has a magic beanstalk is a dumbass. lol Okay 🙄

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

patrick @partnardy.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 16:43 UTC

got an email from a customer that’s light gray text on white background. new levels of psycho shit

0 replies 0 reposts 6 likes

patrick @partnardy.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 16:24 UTC

Steam is SHOOTING out of his ears and the condensation is ruining the ornately patterned denim muumuu he’s wearing

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

patrick @partnardy.bsky.social [ View ] Jun 26, 2023 at 18:58 UTC

Cool forces. Are they countervailing?

0 replies 1 reposts 3 likes

patrick @partnardy.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 14:23 UTC

photo surfaces of RFK Jr. in Dagobah swamp biting into roasted yoda

0 replies 2 reposts 12 likes

patrick @partnardy.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 02:54 UTC

Skirmish of Marksmen: Champion Battle

0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

patrick @partnardy.bsky.social [ View ] Jul 04, 2024 at 00:38 UTC

Top 3 of 2024 1. Balatro 2. Slay The Spire 3. Nicotine Pouches

0 replies 0 reposts 3 likes