B J. Witkin's avatar

B J. Witkin

@itsjustbeej.bsky.social

332 followers 336 following 6755 posts

The guy with the one letter name.

Reposted by B J. Witkin

Q. Pheevr's avatar Q. Pheevr @qpheevr.bsky.social
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Bookmarking this skeet for the next time I need an example of why commas matter

2 replies 17 reposts 102 likes

Reposted by B J. Witkin

the corgi from cowboy bebop's avatar the corgi from cowboy bebop @realqrampage.bsky.social
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I’ve got bad news guys… my boyfriend confessed that he’s been ghostwriting SCOTUS opinions using chatgpt and that he “really fucked up recently”

6 replies 6 reposts 84 likes

B J. Witkin's avatar B J. Witkin @itsjustbeej.bsky.social
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It was 1970. Hell the ad even mentions her chain smoking 😬

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

B J. Witkin's avatar B J. Witkin @itsjustbeej.bsky.social
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I will. That flock is smaller than the one this time of year. She comes around a curve in the path and they literally come waddling as fast as their legs will take them as soon as they see her. I'll try to get video of that too. They eat out of her hand if she lets them. 😍

2 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Reposted by B J. Witkin

Theciscokidder's avatar Theciscokidder @theciscokidder.bsky.social
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Quote post with one of your own fav tweets from the hell site. Here's one of mine 😁

5 replies 23 reposts 99 likes

B J. Witkin's avatar B J. Witkin @itsjustbeej.bsky.social
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My wife walks through a garden on her way to work and passes a duck pond with exotic ducks. Here's video of her feeding them (food approved by the groundskeeper) youtu.be/O0vTJIHY2zw?...

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

B J. Witkin's avatar B J. Witkin @itsjustbeej.bsky.social
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I was just thinking, Man I hate that you have to know this trick. 😔

1 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

B J. Witkin's avatar B J. Witkin @itsjustbeej.bsky.social
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The funny thing about "We can't govern" is that Fox, Q, and a bunch more have their people convinced that Dems can't govern BUT we're also pulling off global conspiracies Which is quite the trick really

0 replies 0 reposts 4 likes

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Ale's avatar Ale @alepresser.com
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If you see this, post a witch in a big hat!

That is my cue! Have a Boopsie, the Wicked Witch Queen of the Deepsea Kingdom, from sidequested.com !!!

2 replies 8 reposts 43 likes

Reposted by B J. Witkin

Micro SF/F by O. Westin's avatar Micro SF/F by O. Westin @microsff.com
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A squire rushed in to the great hall.

"Someone," he shouted, "has taken the sword from the stone!"

The assembled knights halted their dinner.

"At last, a king?"

"Who?"

"I don't know," the squire said. "The sword is gone!"

Elsewhere:
"This," Indy muttered, "belongs in a museum.
#MicroFiction

13 replies 113 reposts 423 likes

B J. Witkin's avatar B J. Witkin @itsjustbeej.bsky.social
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There's a viral marketing web site for the new movie Longlegs and it's done like an old school blog circa year 2000. Oh boy the nostalgia.

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

B J. Witkin's avatar B J. Witkin @itsjustbeej.bsky.social
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As someone with my sensitive teeth, the thing that gets me is when they're both playing with mouths open and you hear their teeth clack together 😬 <endless shudder>

0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

B J. Witkin's avatar B J. Witkin @itsjustbeej.bsky.social
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Also, please stop shooting everything in extreme dark. I think most of us don't have dedicated home theater rooms without windows. Can't see a damn thing in a lot of these films. Latest Jack Ryan series was a flagrant violator.

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Reposted by B J. Witkin

Reposted by B J. Witkin

Reposted by B J. Witkin

B J. Witkin's avatar B J. Witkin @itsjustbeej.bsky.social
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I had knee surgery a few weeks ago and have had to sleep on the couch since. Yeah, as my recovery has progressed I've constantly had to adjust HOW I sleep on the couch. "It hurts less this way. Now it hurts less this way."

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

B J. Witkin's avatar B J. Witkin @itsjustbeej.bsky.social
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We were rewatching Ted Lasso season 2 last night. Keeley is always working to get the team and players publicity and she's constantly talking about them "blowing up on Twitter." If that show was made today I doubt they'd use that same reference. And it's only been a few years!

0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

B J. Witkin's avatar B J. Witkin @itsjustbeej.bsky.social
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As I observed elsewhere, doing so poorly in Biden's economy that you can not only afford a Porsche, you can afford to destroy its resale value

0 replies 1 reposts 3 likes

Reposted by B J. Witkin

Reposted by B J. Witkin

Micah's avatar Micah @rincewind.run
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Discworld QOTD, from Soul Music

8 replies 70 reposts 276 likes

B J. Witkin's avatar B J. Witkin @itsjustbeej.bsky.social
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OK maybe a plastic one to start out 😂

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

B J. Witkin's avatar B J. Witkin @itsjustbeej.bsky.social
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Supposedly Halloween season starts on July 5th so break out the pumpkin

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

B J. Witkin's avatar B J. Witkin @itsjustbeej.bsky.social
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I knew it sounded weird when I wrote it Sorry Jeems 😬

0 replies 0 reposts 4 likes

Reposted by B J. Witkin

Pyramead Head's avatar Pyramead Head @pyrameadhead.wifeguy.online
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Gave proof through the night That our flag was still there 🫡

27 replies 389 reposts 1519 likes

B J. Witkin's avatar B J. Witkin @itsjustbeej.bsky.social
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OMG HE'S MY MOM This is true: she would grab a carton of ice cream and perch in the corner of the kitchen with a spoon. She'd spoon herself a scoop and eat it, then (same spoon) give one to the first sled dog sitting in front of her. Then a scoop for her (same spoon) repeat for all 6-8 dogs

1 replies 0 reposts 6 likes

B J. Witkin's avatar B J. Witkin @itsjustbeej.bsky.social
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Hit the jackpot indeed. To quote my mom, "I hope I get reincarnated as a dog owned by me."

But I'd gladly take being a dog owned by @jamesfrye.bsky.social

1 replies 0 reposts 8 likes

B J. Witkin's avatar B J. Witkin @itsjustbeej.bsky.social
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Doing SO poorly in Joe Biden's economy that they can not only afford a Porsche, they can afford to destroy its resale value.

0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

B J. Witkin's avatar B J. Witkin @itsjustbeej.bsky.social
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Our friends are suing their church bc one of the youth pastors was hitting on their teenage daughter (lots of evidence). The friends are being represented by an attorney that pretty much only does this kind of case. How prevalent is it when you can build your entire career around the issue?

5 replies 9 reposts 57 likes

B J. Witkin's avatar B J. Witkin @itsjustbeej.bsky.social
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We rescued a former hunting dog who we're pretty sure had never been in a house prior to being adopted. Once she hit the couch, she was pretty sure she was gonna like this. But the first time she got human food??? Sealed the deal.

0 replies 0 reposts 5 likes

B J. Witkin's avatar B J. Witkin @itsjustbeej.bsky.social
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This is a true work of genius. Either that or the author has been secretly observing our annual Christmas trip to the beach with my in-laws.

0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes