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korpisworld
@kwkorpi.bsky.social
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BMG in the streets Columbia House in the sheets
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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korpisworld@kwkorpi.bsky.social |
454 followers 665 following 720 posts
Out of my mind. Out of this world. korpisworld.com
verbal arrays: bsky.app/profile/did:plc:xb34vwyxrjhgm6sbdgn5d3qq/feed/aaahpen2tkbw4
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korpisworld
@kwkorpi.bsky.social
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BMG in the streets Columbia House in the sheets
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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Sweetie π
@sixfeetofcandy.bsky.social
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life’s too short to be around people who don’t get your arrested development references
28 replies 41 reposts 204 likes
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korpisworld
@kwkorpi.bsky.social
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[folds flour tortilla with meat in it in half to make a taco] [folds sides in to make a burrito] . . . [folds again to make a ladder to the moon to get that cheese]
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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korpisworld
@kwkorpi.bsky.social
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[at Urologist in full waiting room] Nurse: Mr. K! Bladder up! Me: Please don’t. Nurse: Urine luck! I have your cup! Me: Not in front of all thes- Nurse: -Pee-ple? Me: You’re- Nurse: -Number 1. I know. Off wee wee go!
0 replies 3 reposts 9 likes
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Sweetie π
@sixfeetofcandy.bsky.social
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the void muted me and I was blocked by the abyss now what
10 replies 54 reposts 132 likes
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korpisworld
@kwkorpi.bsky.social
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[Chick-Fil-A drive-thru] Me: Can I get a Chicken Minis combo with a sweet tea? Speaker: Of course! Me: OK, great! Speaker: Me: OK, then, put me down for a Chicken Minis combo!! Speaker: With a sweet tea? Me: Why, yes, thank you! I’ll drive around.
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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korpisworld
@kwkorpi.bsky.social
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[at Chic-Fil-A] Me: Hi Drive-thru speaker: Hi, we have a “k” in our name. Me: Huh, what? Oh, OK thanks. Let me drive around and come back through. [at Chick-Fil-A] Me: Hi, it’s me again.
0 replies 1 reposts 4 likes
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korpisworld
@kwkorpi.bsky.social
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Today is a great day to frolic in a field (within reason).
0 replies 2 reposts 7 likes
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korpisworld
@kwkorpi.bsky.social
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It was a great 4th of July party last night, but today it’s no fun cleaning up the deck of my aircraft carrier afterwards.
0 replies 3 reposts 4 likes
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@kattsdogma.bsky.social
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not a ringing endorsement, tbqh
10 replies 42 reposts 134 likes
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Pretty Good Mike
@prettygoodmike.bsky.social
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playing and splashing in the slop puddle behind arby’s to cool off from the heat
1 replies 13 reposts 20 likes
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𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚃𝚛𝚞𝚝𝚑
@unfitz.bsky.social
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Saw an AI fireworks show and a guy lost all 7 fingers on one hand.
22 replies 438 reposts 1605 likes
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T
@mamafirefly.bsky.social
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Fuck you auto coriander
3 replies 33 reposts 114 likes
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Deeks 🫶
@deeks549.bsky.social
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I don't mean to brag, but I don't need alcohol to send a message that I'll regret
6 replies 73 reposts 214 likes
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Sweetie π
@sixfeetofcandy.bsky.social
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*knocking on the neighbor’s door* may I borrow a cup of uranium?
13 replies 33 reposts 70 likes
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Sweetie π
@sixfeetofcandy.bsky.social
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I cleaned the wax out of my ears for you please respond
8 replies 30 reposts 57 likes
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Sweetie π
@sixfeetofcandy.bsky.social
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RIP Thomas Jefferson you would have loved rotel cheese dip
3 replies 30 reposts 88 likes
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Sweetie π
@sixfeetofcandy.bsky.social
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To celebrate the 4th I filled my fanny pack with macaroni salad
7 replies 34 reposts 86 likes
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CHOAM Nomsky 💭
@thielman.bsky.social
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By Sam Pink.
16 replies 322 reposts 1868 likes
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korpisworld
@kwkorpi.bsky.social
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My dog got out the fenced yard last night because of the firework booms. Couldn’t find her. She reappeared hours later with a damned Redcoat in her mouth! Good girl, Liberty!
0 replies 2 reposts 8 likes
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futurejeffrey🙋🏻♂️
@lacroixboi.lol
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fucking Monday ass Friday
3 replies 47 reposts 168 likes
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debbshock
@debbshock.bsky.social
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the best emoji i have ever seen
2 replies 5 reposts 24 likes
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korpisworld
@kwkorpi.bsky.social
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The real fireworks last night were when drunk Uncle Jimmy tried to cauterize my Roman Candle wound.
0 replies 2 reposts 6 likes
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Marc
@runoldman.bsky.social
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People that are meant to be together will always find a way to fuck it up.
5 replies 40 reposts 71 likes
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Wolfe Van Mural
@guytheguy.bsky.social
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Ok that was fun back to dependence
0 replies 23 reposts 81 likes
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korpisworld
@kwkorpi.bsky.social
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Whoa! I just got back from my dogs taking 𝘮𝘦 for a walk, and, in poor taste, they did not pick up my poop.
0 replies 3 reposts 6 likes
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korpisworld
@kwkorpi.bsky.social
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Today is July 4th, the day we celebrate our freedom, which makes tomorrow, July 5th, Consequences Day.
0 replies 5 reposts 10 likes
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korpisworld
@kwkorpi.bsky.social
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If I worked as hard as my air conditioner, I’d be a porno star.
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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korpisworld
@kwkorpi.bsky.social
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Why waste your days in a chais-lounge on a remote beach when you can do it on a La-Z-Boy recliner I your air-conditioned living room with Sanford and Son in the background instead of incessant waves?
0 replies 4 reposts 7 likes
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korpisworld
@kwkorpi.bsky.social
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I wanna get my dogs drunk and show ‘em a good time for once.
0 replies 2 reposts 4 likes
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korpisworld
@kwkorpi.bsky.social
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People are stupid. In an increasing attempt to capture others’ attentions, they are resorting to increasingly “absurd” ideas. Bacon-wrapped Oreos? Bitch, I did that in third grade! Got me an A in the class.
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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korpisworld
@kwkorpi.bsky.social
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I am good at food
0 replies 8 reposts 15 likes
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korpisworld
@kwkorpi.bsky.social
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JUMP! and you’ll have a 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭 advantage!
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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korpisworld
@kwkorpi.bsky.social
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It’s fittingly American that I can’t fit into my USA t-shirt from last year anymore.
2 replies 10 reposts 30 likes
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Marc
@runoldman.bsky.social
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You know one thing that's good about getting old? No peer pressure! I just don't give a rat's ass what anyone else is doing.
13 replies 64 reposts 178 likes
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Marc
@runoldman.bsky.social
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Some men hate getting the silent treatment. Personally, I like the peace and quiet.
4 replies 46 reposts 79 likes
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Sweetie π
@sixfeetofcandy.bsky.social
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No jury on Earth would convict me after I play them the tape of him constantly clearing his throat
2 replies 23 reposts 66 likes
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d.ly
@dly.bsky.social
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starting an OnlyPlans where you can watch me cancel all the plans i've made
9 replies 51 reposts 153 likes
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Sweetie π
@sixfeetofcandy.bsky.social
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Excuse me good sir, might I doth rest my ankles upon thine shoulders
4 replies 43 reposts 114 likes
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La Captain Oblivious
@whatthefoxy.bsky.social
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Left boob: exercises daily, drinks sparkling water, straight A student, overachiever. Right boob: introvert, lazy, crochets for fun.
12 replies 41 reposts 109 likes
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Sweetie π
@sixfeetofcandy.bsky.social
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Once I become sentient it’s all over for you bitches
4 replies 34 reposts 81 likes
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La Captain Oblivious
@whatthefoxy.bsky.social
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“I can’t believe I’m an adult” I keep telling myself as I struggle opening my lunchable.
11 replies 74 reposts 249 likes
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korpisworld
@kwkorpi.bsky.social
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I just went for a walk in my silk shorts and got a moth caught in my groin.
0 replies 11 reposts 26 likes
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Sweetie π
@sixfeetofcandy.bsky.social
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It’s a lot of pressure knowing the fate of humanity rests on people liking your posts
6 replies 70 reposts 215 likes
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Sweetie π
@sixfeetofcandy.bsky.social
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Accidentally butt dialed the President of Latvia again
6 replies 29 reposts 61 likes
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Xavier
@xinicit.bsky.social
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I don’t know why I snore. I don’t know why I would ever need to breathe that hard when I’m not eating ribs.
2 replies 29 reposts 58 likes