La Captain Oblivious's avatar

La Captain Oblivious

@whatthefoxy.bsky.social

2041 followers 1058 following 5917 posts

Part-time reply gal. Silly goose activated. I tell dad jokes, so that automatically makes me your daddy.

Follow me, I can fix you.

I say things ⬇️

bsky.app/profile/did:plc:sdkxyw2r7xlx5kjhsolgagv6/feed/aaanezoghr4iq


Reposted by La Captain Oblivious

Heather’s Book of Shadows's avatar Heather’s Book of Shadows @heatherupperleft.bsky.social
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Got attacked by a mortar. That’s my queue to go the fuck home

3 replies 3 reposts 11 likes

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Heather’s Book of Shadows's avatar Heather’s Book of Shadows @heatherupperleft.bsky.social
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Just squished a gnat on my phone’s screen and accidentally liked one of my own posts in the process and it feels kind of prophetic somehow.

2 replies 1 reposts 16 likes

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Shade 5's avatar Shade 5 @shade5.bsky.social
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I’d like to pack your trunk.

2 replies 9 reposts 19 likes

La Captain Oblivious's avatar La Captain Oblivious @whatthefoxy.bsky.social
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I went off-roading once and had about 10 orgasms.

12 replies 27 reposts 66 likes

La Captain Oblivious's avatar La Captain Oblivious @whatthefoxy.bsky.social
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Strawberry legs, cottage cheese thighs, muffin tops…ladies we are a snack.

6 replies 22 reposts 66 likes

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Saeg Flowers's avatar Saeg Flowers @onebeanburrito.bsky.social
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everyone get together for a picture now on my count show more joy than you've ever known, ready

0 replies 7 reposts 20 likes

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nige's avatar nige @sensualdad.bsky.social
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good morning to everyone (except the non-sensuals)

0 replies 7 reposts 11 likes

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nige's avatar nige @sensualdad.bsky.social
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[first date] HER: are you crying? ME: *crying with happiness because i finally found my soulmate, but also remembering that girls like bad boys* my eyeballs get sweaty when i think about committing crimes

0 replies 6 reposts 15 likes

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BrujoLoco☠️🖤🏺's avatar BrujoLoco☠️🖤🏺 @patnspankme.bsky.social
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how much for that doggy style in the window?

5 replies 29 reposts 60 likes

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BrujoLoco☠️🖤🏺's avatar BrujoLoco☠️🖤🏺 @patnspankme.bsky.social
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the hotdog contest but instead how many one can fit in their butt

2 replies 10 reposts 21 likes

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BrujoLoco☠️🖤🏺's avatar BrujoLoco☠️🖤🏺 @patnspankme.bsky.social
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gawd I hope it’s sunny tomorrow I have a fat roll & one of my chins I need to finish tanning

2 replies 20 reposts 45 likes

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Memento Morty 🌙's avatar Memento Morty 🌙 @mortythenurse.bsky.social
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If you gaze long enough into the abyussy, the abyussy will gaze back

3 replies 10 reposts 47 likes

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MyNameIsJeff🙋🏻‍♂️'s avatar MyNameIsJeff🙋🏻‍♂️ @lacroixboi.lol
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I showed you my stats, please respond

16 replies 27 reposts 77 likes

La Captain Oblivious's avatar La Captain Oblivious @whatthefoxy.bsky.social
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Strawberry legs, cottage cheese thighs, muffin tops…ladies we are a snack.

6 replies 22 reposts 66 likes

La Captain Oblivious's avatar La Captain Oblivious @whatthefoxy.bsky.social
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Just over here being a snack for the mosquitoes minding my own business.

1 replies 14 reposts 37 likes

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Reposted by La Captain Oblivious

Pot Shop Boy's avatar Pot Shop Boy @potshopboy.bsky.social
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"Our independence is worth celebrating, but not worth a 4 day weekend." -America

3 replies 17 reposts 42 likes

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Minister of Loneliness's avatar Minister of Loneliness @steamymac.bsky.social
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These are interesting times and I think we all need a break from them.

7 replies 79 reposts 158 likes

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Minister of Loneliness's avatar Minister of Loneliness @steamymac.bsky.social
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I keep thinking about the world I would be comfortable in, and I can’t even imagine it anymore.

0 replies 28 reposts 48 likes

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Minister of Loneliness's avatar Minister of Loneliness @steamymac.bsky.social
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Yes, I’m an alpha. afraid of lady’s pleasurable hugs a lot

2 replies 19 reposts 35 likes

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Minister of Loneliness's avatar Minister of Loneliness @steamymac.bsky.social
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Ran out of shampoo so I washed my hair with Ranch dressing and now these seagulls are following me around like I’m the most discount Snow White ever.

9 replies 46 reposts 107 likes

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Ash 's avatar Ash @ashhull.bsky.social
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I’m not a suggested follow.

9 replies 20 reposts 49 likes

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Minister of Loneliness's avatar Minister of Loneliness @steamymac.bsky.social
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Hello, Costco? What is your policy on people paying with obsolete Canadian pennies?

3 replies 20 reposts 39 likes

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La Captain Oblivious's avatar La Captain Oblivious @whatthefoxy.bsky.social
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Lmfao I left it in the freezer so it’ll stay fresh

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

La Captain Oblivious's avatar La Captain Oblivious @whatthefoxy.bsky.social
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Where did you get this pic of me? 🤨

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

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SpatialKimtamine's avatar SpatialKimtamine @kimmalien.bsky.social
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Nothing pisses me off more than prepping a freaking salad while I’m starving

14 replies 35 reposts 246 likes

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SpatialKimtamine's avatar SpatialKimtamine @kimmalien.bsky.social
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I don’t mind getting rejected in any way but don’t you even think about rejecting my duels

6 replies 16 reposts 40 likes

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d.ly's avatar d.ly @dly.bsky.social
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[me, tryna fit in on bsky] these nuts!

12 replies 51 reposts 156 likes

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James's avatar James @tarnation.bsky.social
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Really thankful for all my body parts even the ones that could've been designed better like balls

0 replies 8 reposts 15 likes

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heiðrún's avatar heiðrún @harpy.party
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if I was a squirrel I'd be a real cunt about it

0 replies 16 reposts 43 likes

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𝓦𝔦𝔠𝔨𝔢𝔡 𝓖𝔞𝔯𝔡𝔢𝔫's avatar 𝓦𝔦𝔠𝔨𝔢𝔡 𝓖𝔞𝔯𝔡𝔢𝔫 @wickedgarden.bsky.social
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A Costco sheet cake would fix me for sure.

1 replies 6 reposts 16 likes

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MyNameIsJeff🙋🏻‍♂️'s avatar MyNameIsJeff🙋🏻‍♂️ @lacroixboi.lol
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🐰🖤👄

14 replies 25 reposts 171 likes

Reposted by La Captain Oblivious