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Tim Onion@bencollins.bsky.social |
"The Bernie Bros and K-Hive appear to be forming an alliance," I say at the 4th of July cookout. An anvil falls out of the sky directly onto my person, killing me instantly. God appears through the clouds. "I did that," he says. Family and friends applaud politely.
38 replies 272 reposts 2172 likes
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Rich Wanket
@richwanket.bsky.social
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I remember clearly the Bernie bros calling Kamala a cop.
3 replies 0 reposts 3 likes
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Cate 🐬
@catebridget.bsky.social
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golf clap and go back to grilling
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Time Spinner
@spinny.bsky.social
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oh for all this time I thougt KHive was a kpop thing 🙃
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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kilgore trout
@kilgoretrout.bsky.social
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tbh this sounds like a better fourth than the ones with the noodle sandwiches
3 replies 0 reposts 82 likes
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John Minnihan
@jbminn.bsky.social
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will one anvil be enough though
0 replies 0 reposts 4 likes
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ddouglas 💎 🇺🇦 🦋
@dd9000.bsky.social
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There is NO similarity, none, zero, zip, nada between the Bernie Bros and K-Hive
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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cdpositive
@cdpositive.bsky.social
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👏👏👏
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Traveller In Black
@traveller-in-black.bsky.social
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"Bernie Bro" is kind of an insult, anyway. People who supported Bernie weren't bros, and didn't cost HRC the election.
10 replies 0 reposts 12 likes
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Jonathan Pierce
@jonathanpierce.bsky.social
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I hope this happens so we don’t have to see the “sandwich” again.
0 replies 0 reposts 8 likes
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Sneed's Feed and Seed (formerly Chuck's)
@ruleo.bsky.social
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0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Cosmic Doomrock
@deathbymeteor.bsky.social
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Ahh, the DM of your life playing the "Rocks fall, everyone dies" card, but with anvils
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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Ian Miles Schlong
@tedcruznipples.com
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May your memory be a blessing
0 replies 0 reposts 6 likes
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Jeff Bachtel
@jeffbach.bsky.social
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0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Philip Bump
@pbump.com
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dude always wants credit
0 replies 0 reposts 13 likes
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Rev. Magdalen
@revmagdalen.bsky.social
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😂You're actually pretty damn funny, Tim Onion. I mean, to extremely online people.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Dandy G
@dangyd.bsky.social
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Pope to bestow Sainthood on Guy Who Forced the Second Coming of Christ by being Too Fucking Annoying
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Paul Frazee 💥
@pfrazee.com
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It's important that God enacts some easy-to-understand miracles in addition to the bigger and more abstract ones, so that believers know He's fighting for them
1 replies 2 reposts 38 likes
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Adrian Bonenberger
@bonenberger.bsky.social
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Bernie Ride or Dies offering spirit bomb energy to the K Hive mostly to spite the Clinton dead-enders who continue to scapegoat Sanders for their own candidate’s unique lack of charisma and inexcusable loss to Trump
2 replies 0 reposts 11 likes
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civ - 🇵🇸 🕎 ☮️ - end the genocide now
@uncivil.bsky.social
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you overturn your uncle's barbeque grill, turning the 4th of July into the 4th of Shir
0 replies 0 reposts 11 likes
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RawFrustrations.bsky.social
@rawfrustrations.bsky.social
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🌴🥥🕊️
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Hare 🍉
@haredurer.bsky.social
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The judgments of the Lord are true and righteous altogether
0 replies 0 reposts 6 likes
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We're Skroob
@pseudonymble.bsky.social
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There is no God, there is only Acme.
1 replies 0 reposts 4 likes
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SirRipsAlot
@sirripsalot.bsky.social
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I was ready for it but the khive didn't seem as interested.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Jonathan
@jginsburg.bsky.social
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.... I HAVE STARED INTO THE FACE OF MADNESS AND IT MADE SENSE
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Joe Sweeney
@jsweeney73.bsky.social
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Zoosha, K-Smog, Batboy etc.
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Rebecca Robare
@robareowl.bsky.social
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This reads like an outtake from The Library on Mount Char
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Father Jim's Flapjacks
@fathersfjs.bsky.social
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Flipping flapjacks while I survey the cookout for who they want to be the new monarch
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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AJ McKenna
@ajmckenna.bsky.social
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God is great
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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stuckatthisbit
@stuckatthisbit.bsky.social
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WITH GREAT VENGEANCE AND FUUUUUUURIOUS ANGER
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Matt Salomone
@matthematics.com
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1 replies 0 reposts 38 likes
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Demblu
@phranklindb.bsky.social
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Doubt it. DSA BBros 🌹 are despised by K-Hive. And K-Hive was equally despised by Bros. They were mortal enemies from beginning thru today.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Dmitri
@momus.bsky.social
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god is only mad because he can't handle the truth
0 replies 0 reposts 8 likes
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David Stonehill
@dstonehill.bsky.social
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RFK Jr. shows up at the BBQ. People start to gag and turn away. “Was it something I said?” says Bobby. “This crowd is Ruff.”
0 replies 0 reposts 5 likes
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alex 🌴🥥
@uneedabiscuit.bsky.social
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if you were wearing the signature helmet of the cocobro brigade (kamalist-broist reformed) you might have survived this brush with the divine ijs
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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empty seats can't melt supreme court justices
@emptyjetseatbribes.bsky.social
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5/10 MR. onion
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Melissa Gira Grant
@melissagiragrant.com
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smacks of gender
1 replies 1 reposts 22 likes
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Windypundit
@windypundit.com
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God is just!
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Prada 🇵🇸🍉♥️
@pradaprada.bsky.social
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Copmala Fate
Biden Harris already lost a ton of support from Black voters since 2020.
For same reasons he’s lost other voters, age, housing prices, Gaza. Etc etc.
No introspection, just weird racist claims that Black voters are a monolith.
prada.substack.com/p/you-get-sc...
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes