Midtown_Doom_Loop's avatar

Midtown_Doom_Loop

@midtowndoom.bsky.social

290 followers 668 following 1161 posts

Upper Midwest Atonal Whistling Champion 1995-1997. Runner-up 1999. Winner of the prestigious Lexapro medal in Sarajevo. Go hard on the puck. Baseball cards as mid-life crisis.

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mental chillness's avatar mental chillness @dadjokes.icu
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0 replies 12 reposts 68 likes

Midtown_Doom_Loop's avatar Midtown_Doom_Loop @midtowndoom.bsky.social
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Now Ticketmaster lost my personal info in a data breach. If you can’t trust Ticketmaster who can you trust

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

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Ashley, 69th of Her Name's avatar Ashley, 69th of Her Name @ashleysays.bsky.social
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It’s ok Boeing. I’m also falling apart and no one likes me

1 replies 12 reposts 26 likes

Midtown_Doom_Loop's avatar Midtown_Doom_Loop @midtowndoom.bsky.social
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They did. Even though the hibachi side of the family mocked them thoroughly

1 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

Midtown_Doom_Loop's avatar Midtown_Doom_Loop @midtowndoom.bsky.social
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I bought sushi tonight for the sushi half of the family

1 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

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Midtown_Doom_Loop's avatar Midtown_Doom_Loop @midtowndoom.bsky.social
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Funny how Clarence keeps turning up all over the damn place

0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

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SpatialKimtamine's avatar SpatialKimtamine @kimmalien.bsky.social
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My legal advice is to go to prison

6 replies 25 reposts 81 likes

Midtown_Doom_Loop's avatar Midtown_Doom_Loop @midtowndoom.bsky.social
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You have to get Wohl and Burkman to bumble around and call random press conferences

0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

Midtown_Doom_Loop's avatar Midtown_Doom_Loop @midtowndoom.bsky.social
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Instead of tourniquet pronounce it turn-a-kay. It sounds more special.

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Midtown_Doom_Loop's avatar Midtown_Doom_Loop @midtowndoom.bsky.social
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What a mess. I hope they can get this sorted quickly.

0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

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bridget epitropakis's avatar bridget epitropakis @bepitropakis.bsky.social
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of course argentina was gonna beat canada in a game with no sticks

0 replies 1 reposts 24 likes

Midtown_Doom_Loop's avatar Midtown_Doom_Loop @midtowndoom.bsky.social
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Have you ever said something to your wife along the lines of “have you considered being less insane?” I wouldn’t recommend it.

0 replies 1 reposts 3 likes

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Midtown_Doom_Loop's avatar Midtown_Doom_Loop @midtowndoom.bsky.social
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So which one is the other white meat?

0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

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Deeks 🫶's avatar Deeks 🫶 @deeks549.bsky.social
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Quit airing other peoples business. Life is fuckin hard. Go help them or shut the fuck up

8 replies 38 reposts 79 likes

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Deeks 🫶's avatar Deeks 🫶 @deeks549.bsky.social
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I have 5 of the 6 symptoms of death

4 replies 33 reposts 89 likes

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Moby Dick's avatar Moby Dick @mobydickatsea.bsky.social
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Like machines, they dumbly moved about the deck

1 replies 7 reposts 33 likes

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Pine Affinity's avatar Pine Affinity @breed.bsky.social
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Einstein Brothers’ everything cigarettes

1 replies 11 reposts 36 likes

Midtown_Doom_Loop's avatar Midtown_Doom_Loop @midtowndoom.bsky.social
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PhD in Marketing, Professor at the Sam Walton College of Business. Seems legit.

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Midtown_Doom_Loop's avatar Midtown_Doom_Loop @midtowndoom.bsky.social
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I ate 12 carbs of almond flour crackers for breakfast ask me about death

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Midtown_Doom_Loop's avatar Midtown_Doom_Loop @midtowndoom.bsky.social
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Let me know when the hurricane gets to Chicago

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Midtown_Doom_Loop's avatar Midtown_Doom_Loop @midtowndoom.bsky.social
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SoDak has produced a lot of colorful political characters

0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

Midtown_Doom_Loop's avatar Midtown_Doom_Loop @midtowndoom.bsky.social
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I’ve saved enough USA points to receive either free parking for a year anywhere in the country, or a rest area in Nebraska named after me.

0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

Midtown_Doom_Loop's avatar Midtown_Doom_Loop @midtowndoom.bsky.social
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I would have to join a gang just to make ends meet if I moved to LA

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Midtown_Doom_Loop's avatar Midtown_Doom_Loop @midtowndoom.bsky.social
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I have two types of days: Payday!!! White-knuckling it to payday.

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

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Matty Cat 🐈‍⬛'s avatar Matty Cat 🐈‍⬛ @catcreature.bsky.social
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Send not to know for whom the bell tolls. Just play it cool, man.

1 replies 4 reposts 18 likes

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Princess of Whales's avatar Princess of Whales @princessofwhales2.bsky.social
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Them: know thyself Me googling: how can I un-know myself

2 replies 40 reposts 88 likes

Midtown_Doom_Loop's avatar Midtown_Doom_Loop @midtowndoom.bsky.social
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My Mom still hangs the macaroni and pipe cleaner ornaments I made in pre-school

1 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

Midtown_Doom_Loop's avatar Midtown_Doom_Loop @midtowndoom.bsky.social
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Now I’m imagining a firefight and the damn vending machine won’t accept my wrinkled up dollar bills.

1 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

Midtown_Doom_Loop's avatar Midtown_Doom_Loop @midtowndoom.bsky.social
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Just another normal week here in ‘Merica

1 replies 0 reposts 6 likes

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Minister of Loneliness's avatar Minister of Loneliness @steamymac.bsky.social
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Are you there god? It’s me, a fucking idiot.

2 replies 39 reposts 97 likes

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Coach Rusty's avatar Coach Rusty @coachrusty.bsky.social
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Some of y’all are straight up coveting thy neighbor’s wife tbh

11 replies 25 reposts 80 likes

Midtown_Doom_Loop's avatar Midtown_Doom_Loop @midtowndoom.bsky.social
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Much better than this celery I’ve got

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Midtown_Doom_Loop's avatar Midtown_Doom_Loop @midtowndoom.bsky.social
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Developing a line of negative calorie foods

1 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

Midtown_Doom_Loop's avatar Midtown_Doom_Loop @midtowndoom.bsky.social
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But it don’t make no difference dr.

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Midtown_Doom_Loop's avatar Midtown_Doom_Loop @midtowndoom.bsky.social
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Neighbors wife called him up from deployment and told him she wants a divorce. Anyway, new girlfriend just arrived.

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Midtown_Doom_Loop's avatar Midtown_Doom_Loop @midtowndoom.bsky.social
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I’m going to be a cranky old fuck sneaking out of the home to smoke cigarette butts I find on the sidewalk.

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

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Jeff VanderMeer's avatar Jeff VanderMeer @jeffvandermeer.bsky.social
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Live funereal piano music in the Portland airport. Dirges. Kid is either oblivious to context or keenly attuned to passenger emotions.

10 replies 26 reposts 281 likes

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One Dog’s Opinion 🐾's avatar One Dog’s Opinion 🐾 @onedogsopinion.bsky.social
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when I say “the other day” it might be 1998 who even knows

5 replies 35 reposts 120 likes