John Carpenter’s The Alex Nevil's avatar

John Carpenter’s The Alex Nevil

@thealexnevil.bsky.social

2133 followers 1622 following 3142 posts

Person of interest in the hunt for a ruthless jaywalking ring.

If interested, here are some of my scribbles and bits: bsky.app/profile/did:plc:mx4w4wha2sfxrovy2aoybyod/feed/aaadjjnkylwbe

John Carpenter’s The Alex Nevil's avatar John Carpenter’s The Alex Nevil @thealexnevil.bsky.social
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Schrödinger’s Cat: Guess what, asshole!

8 replies 90 reposts 344 likes

John Carpenter’s The Alex Nevil's avatar John Carpenter’s The Alex Nevil @thealexnevil.bsky.social
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"Walk away. You do not want any part of him when he's like this. Just apologize and walk away."

21 replies 383 reposts 1816 likes

John Carpenter’s The Alex Nevil's avatar John Carpenter’s The Alex Nevil @thealexnevil.bsky.social
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InkyFAM! You rock and you know that!

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

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Barred and Boujee aka Madiba Dennie's avatar Barred and Boujee aka Madiba Dennie @audrelawdamercy.bsky.social
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Alito: Presidents have to make all sorts of decisions! If he makes a mistake he’s subject to criminal laws just like anybody else? You don’t think he’s in an especially precious position? Motherfucker, you think Trump did a coup on accident? That he didn't know he couldn't do that?

17 replies 59 reposts 398 likes

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Reposted by John Carpenter’s The Alex Nevil

One Dog’s Opinion 🐾's avatar One Dog’s Opinion 🐾 @onedogsopinion.bsky.social
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a lost and found but for strawberry fields forever

0 replies 5 reposts 9 likes

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Reposted by John Carpenter’s The Alex Nevil

Link is coconut-pilled. 🥥 🌴 's avatar Link is coconut-pilled. 🥥 🌴 @knilirabaj.bsky.social
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Clarence Thomas is an “intellectual powerhouse” of the conservative legal movement, or so I’ve been told.

17 replies 82 reposts 497 likes

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Brooke Binkowski's avatar Brooke Binkowski @brooklynmarie.bsky.social
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Hey, that's just what free speech looks like... hang on, I'm getting handed a note here...

3 replies 13 reposts 71 likes

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Erin Fogg's avatar Erin Fogg @criminalerin.bsky.social
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Idk how anyone can deny climate change is real when cop riot season is starting two whole months earlier than usual

23 replies 1280 reposts 4701 likes

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Reposted by John Carpenter’s The Alex Nevil

minkitypinkity ❤️'s avatar minkitypinkity ❤️ @minkitypinkity.bsky.social
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i just want to be rich enough that i never have to wear pants again

2 replies 22 reposts 55 likes

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𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚃𝚛𝚞𝚝𝚑's avatar 𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚃𝚛𝚞𝚝𝚑 @unfitz.bsky.social
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Her: What should I wear? I’ve never been to an orgy. Me: I believe you.

0 replies 28 reposts 57 likes

John Carpenter’s The Alex Nevil's avatar John Carpenter’s The Alex Nevil @thealexnevil.bsky.social
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[Chef's kiss] That's from a chef, not me.

1 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

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Uncle Duke's avatar Uncle Duke @uncleduke1969.bsky.social
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“You know, I could just grab a fish.” “That's not the point, Gerald.”

7 replies 64 reposts 253 likes

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Jimmer Cork-Bottle's avatar Jimmer Cork-Bottle @jimmerthatisall.bsky.social
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"Why are you still wearing that face mask?“ "You mean my blankie?”

0 replies 19 reposts 37 likes

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Dropped Mike's avatar Dropped Mike @rebrafsim.bsky.social
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me: why do you look so ashamed of me? her: I can’t believe you’re wearing goggles me: we’re in the front row, what if I get splashed? her: it’s a baptism

0 replies 12 reposts 32 likes

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Dropped Mike's avatar Dropped Mike @rebrafsim.bsky.social
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me: I wear the pants in this family! her: are those unicorn garanimals?

0 replies 15 reposts 40 likes

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𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚃𝚛𝚞𝚝𝚑's avatar 𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚃𝚛𝚞𝚝𝚑 @unfitz.bsky.social
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[first date] Her: Are you wearing a wire? Me: *realizing I forgot to take the hanger out of my shirt before putting it on*

2 replies 71 reposts 182 likes

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Jimmer Cork-Bottle's avatar Jimmer Cork-Bottle @jimmerthatisall.bsky.social
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This day in history. 1968. The Beatles refused to perform for the queen because while her majesty was a pretty nice girl she didn't have a lot to say and also she changed from day to day.

1 replies 23 reposts 40 likes

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bacon popsicle 🐻‍❄️🪩's avatar bacon popsicle 🐻‍❄️🪩 @gupton68.bsky.social
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“You are a strong, beautiful woman” was apparently not quite what my wife expected to hear me say, particularly as I was wearing her favourite lingerie and talking to a full-length mirror at the time. I have to say, the IKEA security guards seemed kinda surprised too.

2 replies 41 reposts 95 likes

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Danny 's avatar Danny @mardigroan.bsky.social
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I'm "clicks on every Springsteen concert clip that the algorithm puts on my timeline" years old.

1 replies 3 reposts 7 likes

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Danny 's avatar Danny @mardigroan.bsky.social
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A self-absorbed TV meteorologist who preens like a peacock? Why not call that person a weather vain?

0 replies 7 reposts 16 likes

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Danny 's avatar Danny @mardigroan.bsky.social
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I managed to put a fresh set of sheets on the bed despite the cat neglecting to "help" this time.

0 replies 7 reposts 15 likes

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Danny 's avatar Danny @mardigroan.bsky.social
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That seems like a lie like "non-stick pan" or "customer service."

0 replies 8 reposts 13 likes

John Carpenter’s The Alex Nevil's avatar John Carpenter’s The Alex Nevil @thealexnevil.bsky.social
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Isn't that one of the signs of the apocalypse?

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

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Danny 's avatar Danny @mardigroan.bsky.social
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What if people stopped microwaving in 30 second increments and instead began using odd, random, and even prime number heating or reheating time segments? What then?

11 replies 7 reposts 22 likes

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Paul's avatar Paul @grommit56.bsky.social
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Being at work and getting the Doordash notifications for the Chinese food your wife just ordered is like next level bullshit.

1 replies 10 reposts 25 likes

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Paul's avatar Paul @grommit56.bsky.social
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Watching a friend crash & burn and being powerless to help is a special kind of suck.

2 replies 11 reposts 36 likes

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Paul's avatar Paul @grommit56.bsky.social
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Watching a YouTube video about restaurant/fast food places that no longer exist. I know it's just nostalgia and those places weren't all that great. But man what I wouldn't give to wail on a couple Big Chefs right now.

0 replies 5 reposts 10 likes

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Paul's avatar Paul @grommit56.bsky.social
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He is just a whiny bitch. A whiny bitch like no one has ever seen before. The best whiny bitch, let me tell you.

0 replies 5 reposts 15 likes

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Bogey 's avatar Bogey @oneyebogey.bsky.social
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I never expected that stupid people would become so empowered, I guess I’m not as smart as I think I am.

2 replies 28 reposts 58 likes

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Ennui Doofen's avatar Ennui Doofen @ennuidoofen.bsky.social
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For every annoying comment, a puppy begins a life long smoking habit. Think about what you're doing

13 replies 60 reposts 259 likes

John Carpenter’s The Alex Nevil's avatar John Carpenter’s The Alex Nevil @thealexnevil.bsky.social
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They are the destroyers of fun.

0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

John Carpenter’s The Alex Nevil's avatar John Carpenter’s The Alex Nevil @thealexnevil.bsky.social
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Some see the world as it is and ask, “Why?” Others see the world as it is and ask, “No, seriously—WHY?”

1 replies 41 reposts 92 likes

John Carpenter’s The Alex Nevil's avatar John Carpenter’s The Alex Nevil @thealexnevil.bsky.social
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Dog: Why do you tell people I can talk? Me: Because it makes me smile and I figure it might make them smile too. Dog: Me: Dog: You can tell them I’m pretty fair dancer too.

0 replies 38 reposts 77 likes

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Surprised Face Guy's avatar Surprised Face Guy @surprisedface.bsky.social
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Are you there god? It’s me, hi, I’m the problem it’s me.

1 replies 9 reposts 23 likes

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Lil Crow's avatar Lil Crow @lilcrow12.bsky.social
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Somebody got a fur trim tooooday! 😂

0 replies 5 reposts 11 likes

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Ygrene ✔️'s avatar Ygrene ✔️ @ygrene.bsky.social
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billboard: hey look at me me: can’t I’m driving billboard: come on look me: eyes on the road billboard: pls it’s important me: fine what is it billboard: drive safely lol

8 replies 232 reposts 1342 likes

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Chestbursty's avatar Chestbursty @chestrovert.bsky.social
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I believe in you and your dumbass dreams

3 replies 60 reposts 131 likes

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Lil Crow's avatar Lil Crow @lilcrow12.bsky.social
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You just robbed a bank. Who is the getaway driver?

1 replies 2 reposts 12 likes