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yoyo
@deadgirlyoyo.bsky.social
[ View ] |
all day i dream about blt's
2 replies 7 reposts 17 likes
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lalalyds@lalalyds.bsky.social |
1298 followers 873 following 1529 posts
I really enjoy potato salad
⬇️Lemme feed you⬇️
bsky.app/profile/did:plc:wrs5ycqkoik4ol4s3fhkdoug/feed/aaablylvlubqk
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yoyo
@deadgirlyoyo.bsky.social
[ View ] |
all day i dream about blt's
2 replies 7 reposts 17 likes
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Rachel
@slightlycaustic.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I don’t really look old enough to have the disposition of a cranky old guy. But here I am.
5 replies 8 reposts 41 likes
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Uncle Kermit
@unclekermit.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Mike's hard luck story.
0 replies 5 reposts 9 likes
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Tusk Jenkins
@tuskjenkins.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Fortunes on kazoo paper, humming on cookies. "What. It's bring your parallel universe to leisure day."
1 replies 34 reposts 49 likes
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Tusk Jenkins
@tuskjenkins.bsky.social
[ View ] |
It was on this very horror a hundred years ago that I picked up some lost highway townsfolk said was just me being reincarnated from a feel good sprinkler runoff of the summer
1 replies 32 reposts 42 likes
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Jason, ex Inferis
@benedictsred.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Hiring a bunch of mob guys to follow me around and say, “OH!” every time I make a cute little joke.
12 replies 27 reposts 76 likes
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Jason, ex Inferis
@benedictsred.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Not everyone can be a silly goose. Someone has to be the grim gander
2 replies 38 reposts 97 likes
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𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚃𝚛𝚞𝚝𝚑
@unfitz.bsky.social
[ View ] |
[first date] Me: So what do you do? Her: I sell photos of my feet online. Me: Feet? No thanks. I’m a metric guy.
2 replies 32 reposts 77 likes
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PAM!
@pamtoo.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Would someone please come over and rub my tummy full of pasta. Only weirdos.
1 replies 10 reposts 27 likes
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PAM!
@pamtoo.bsky.social
[ View ] |
There isn't anything wrong with me that rolling over in bed and flinging my arm over a man's bare torso can't fix.
1 replies 7 reposts 24 likes
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Astr0z0mbreez
@astr0z0mbreez.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Walkin past a Planet Fitness yelling through the window, “My Dad has bigger muscles than all of you w out even trying!”
0 replies 9 reposts 19 likes
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Xavier
@xinicit.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Those feels when you have acid reflux and should not be lying on your back but your dog is resting their head on your lap so you have to think about whether you really *need* an esophagus.
0 replies 22 reposts 46 likes
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Xavier
@xinicit.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Most “cooling towels” are basically useless in a humid environment except for the fact that they make really good sweat bands.
1 replies 10 reposts 21 likes
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chris.
@azedand2knots.bsky.social
[ View ] |
HOW ABOUT THAT SUMMER DEPRESSION, FOLKS? WHEW.
8 replies 38 reposts 130 likes
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chris.
@azedand2knots.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I'm sorry but no, I will not be manifesting anything more substantial than a tape worm.
5 replies 21 reposts 48 likes
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chris.
@azedand2knots.bsky.social
[ View ] |
When they describe a book as Women's Fiction, I can only presume they mean written in blood.
0 replies 29 reposts 74 likes
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Wicked Ho
@nicebutnot.bsky.social
[ View ] |
it’s okay sweetheart drink your milk and take your muscle relaxers you can write your long winded reply later
8 replies 47 reposts 115 likes
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Theciscokidder
@theciscokidder.bsky.social
[ View ] |
*Gain Flings voice* Wanna see my basement?
0 replies 10 reposts 14 likes
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Theciscokidder
@theciscokidder.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Nothing more sus than an "attractive" "young" "female" sliding into your dm's with "hi"
6 replies 14 reposts 40 likes
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La Captain Oblivious
@whatthefoxy.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Hello. I’m heading over to be weird with you.
16 replies 41 reposts 112 likes
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T
@mamafirefly.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Just know if you’re mean to me I’ll pull out a harmonica and sing ‘Hook’ by Blues Traveler
1 replies 11 reposts 29 likes
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Marshall Scott
@marshallscott.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Breaking into my enemies home and stealing all their cheese
0 replies 5 reposts 22 likes
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futurejeffrey🙋🏻♂️
@lacroixboi.lol
[ View ] |
I gently tossed my dinner bread to try to get cast in a movie… I rolled my roll for a role
0 replies 10 reposts 25 likes
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futurejeffrey🙋🏻♂️
@lacroixboi.lol
[ View ] |
Is there a Transformer stork that drops off baby Transformers ?
4 replies 12 reposts 30 likes
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Fulkery, A Thing Within Stuff
@fulkery.bsky.social
[ View ] |
[licks finger and raises it, eyes narrowed] I have no idea where my pants are.
2 replies 8 reposts 15 likes
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Saeg Flowers
@onebeanburrito.bsky.social
[ View ] |
knife in my teeth climbing up the troposphere to the heart of the stormcloud
0 replies 18 reposts 35 likes
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d.ly
@dly.bsky.social
[ View ] |
i muted you, please respond
21 replies 34 reposts 130 likes
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Minister of Loneliness
@steamymac.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Settle down, lady, I was checking out your dog, not you.
0 replies 36 reposts 77 likes
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Manofletterz
@manofletterz.bsky.social
[ View ] |
There's a right way to cook (use a fuckton of garlic) and a wrong way
0 replies 5 reposts 12 likes
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Manofletterz
@manofletterz.bsky.social
[ View ] |
We hardly know each other and I don't ever want that to change
0 replies 12 reposts 27 likes
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BBKitty
@bbkbhv.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Yes, its me! I’m back I hate to ask, but I’d love to find my people again. Any chance you guys help me out?
22 replies 68 reposts 121 likes
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Damien
@dfacobbre.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Pizza soldiers, taking baths in garlic dip.
0 replies 2 reposts 3 likes
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Damien
@dfacobbre.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Let’s point the finger at each other.
0 replies 2 reposts 2 likes
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Wicked Ho
@nicebutnot.bsky.social
[ View ] |
i’ve been caffeine free for seven hours murder seems likely
22 replies 59 reposts 397 likes
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𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚃𝚛𝚞𝚝𝚑
@unfitz.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Sorry your boyfriend thinks the clitoris is the chamber in which a caterpillar transforms into a butterfly.
12 replies 56 reposts 165 likes
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d.ly
@dly.bsky.social
[ View ] |
tomorrow i’m gonna wake up and ruin someone’s life
14 replies 36 reposts 127 likes
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Ƙappa
@dopeshow.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Long pressing your stupid mouth for more options
0 replies 9 reposts 16 likes
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Uncle Duke
@uncleduke1969.bsky.social
[ View ] |
"Alright, places ladies, places. Annemarie, Suzanne, you two are in the first number. Suzanne, how about you try not to fall on your face this time? Lorraine, go see Todd in makeup, you look like a clown. And Nancy, for chrissakes, put on some underwear."
5 replies 34 reposts 116 likes
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Raquel Squelch
@raquelsquelch.bsky.social
[ View ] |
find something you'd loathe on today's news menu how about anxiety with a side of dread and is that all or are you interested in specials we've got (see market price) crushing despair it pairs well with nights scared awake did you save room let's box it up you can take it to go
3 replies 26 reposts 39 likes
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Frances Meh
@francesmeh.reviews
[ View ] |
i had a good post but now i’ve forgotten it: a love story
2 replies 16 reposts 39 likes
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Jamestopher
@tarnation.bsky.social
[ View ] |
You don’t love me, you love the thought of me wearing my high top Crocs, otherwise nude.
3 replies 17 reposts 35 likes
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Ennui Doofen
@ennuidoofen.bsky.social
[ View ] |
guy who puts change in the Coinstar machine one coin at a time yelling, "You can take that to the bank!"
4 replies 73 reposts 210 likes
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Damnit Janet
@damnitjanet.bsky.social
[ View ] |
One day i'm gonna have too many naps and my ear's just gonna flatten round my head
2 replies 18 reposts 46 likes
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Frances Meh
@francesmeh.reviews
[ View ] |
just killing it* rn *lying on my back and doing fuck all
3 replies 18 reposts 66 likes
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yoyo
@deadgirlyoyo.bsky.social
[ View ] |
do you hate me or are you in hate with me?
6 replies 11 reposts 40 likes
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Jared Gonia
@jaredgonia.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Lo-fi beats to loaf to
1 replies 5 reposts 23 likes
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Jared Gonia
@jaredgonia.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Little Bo Peep and her electric sheep, riding in an electric Jeep
1 replies 2 reposts 10 likes
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Pot Shop Boy
@potshopboy.bsky.social
[ View ] |
*dropping through your ceiling and crashing through your desk* are you mad at me?
1 replies 34 reposts 80 likes
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Molly
@bettyriot.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I can still drop it like it’s hot but I’m going to need a second to get back up
4 replies 34 reposts 120 likes
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Jason, ex Inferis
@benedictsred.bsky.social
[ View ] |
All dishes are disposable if you’re depressed enough.
9 replies 71 reposts 273 likes