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Marjorie James Keenan
@unenthusiast.com
[ View ] |
I do not know what is wrong with you but it is very familiar with what is wrong with me (mimics mime-in-mirror routine)
1 replies 6 reposts 12 likes
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Raquel Squelch@raquelsquelch.bsky.social |
360 followers 284 following 258 posts
a sort of rhyme & a sucking sound
bsky.app/profile/did:plc:7bv2ca3yawj662o7qxd5xyt7/feed/aaagsq7wlqhoe
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Marjorie James Keenan
@unenthusiast.com
[ View ] |
I do not know what is wrong with you but it is very familiar with what is wrong with me (mimics mime-in-mirror routine)
1 replies 6 reposts 12 likes
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Marjorie James Keenan
@unenthusiast.com
[ View ] |
John Mayer maynot too soon to say really
0 replies 4 reposts 7 likes
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Christina, mother of spiders
@aikiwomannc.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Craft beer so hip it was strained through the used socks of Mumford and Sons.
0 replies 9 reposts 19 likes
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Wicked Ho
@nicebutnot.bsky.social
[ View ] |
a daycare for adults where instead of cookies and juice you get Xanax and vodka
13 replies 55 reposts 161 likes
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d.ly
@dly.bsky.social
[ View ] |
[me, tryna fit in on bsky] these nuts!
12 replies 51 reposts 157 likes
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Wicked Ho
@nicebutnot.bsky.social
[ View ] |
James Madison was 25 years old when he signed the constitution When I was 25 I was doing cocaine off a car key in the ladies room with my girlies
21 replies 34 reposts 179 likes
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chris.
@azedand2knots.bsky.social
[ View ] |
You can have high tea with the princes and queens or you can have low tea with the rats and the gnats, these are your only two choices.
2 replies 22 reposts 44 likes
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RM
@dorsalstream.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Here’s a poem well worth a moment: “Loom,” by Bradley Trumpfheller
poets.org/poem/loom
2 replies 2 reposts 6 likes
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Goddamnit Dave
@daveastated.bsky.social
[ View ] |
You can always tell if the person in a portrait is a politician by the way their lies follow you around the room.
0 replies 2 reposts 3 likes
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d.ly
@dly.bsky.social
[ View ] |
raise your hand if you’ve accidentally joined a polycule while checking out at Trader Joe’s
9 replies 30 reposts 92 likes
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🅿️rofessor Kiosk 💊
@professorkiosk.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Going to see an 80s tribute band called The Spicolis tonight. Is this what being old feels like?
11 replies 15 reposts 47 likes
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Jason, ex Inferis
@benedictsred.bsky.social
[ View ] |
The way I act when I have a crush is very not on brand
1 replies 23 reposts 57 likes
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Coach Rusty
@coachrusty.bsky.social
[ View ] |
“Keto friendly” bitch ain’t nobody friendly on keto
1 replies 27 reposts 80 likes
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𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚃𝚛𝚞𝚝𝚑
@unfitz.bsky.social
[ View ] |
“Hey, my eyes are up h- Fuck it, they’re all over the place. Just stop staring at my tits or I’ll bite your head off.” - spiders, probably
0 replies 15 reposts 20 likes
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TuSoon Shakur
@tusoonshakur.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Mario [breaking up with Peach] itsa not you
0 replies 18 reposts 69 likes
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SpatialKimtamine
@kimmalien.bsky.social
[ View ] |
You can block me but you will never feel safe again
6 replies 31 reposts 58 likes
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Brosephine Wires
@joparkerbear.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Not only could I happily live at an arctic research station, that is my new life goal
5 replies 18 reposts 42 likes
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Splendid Hobo
@splendidhobo.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Have we considered this whole thing might be a psychotic drug trial?
1 replies 16 reposts 39 likes
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donni saphire
@donni.bsky.social
[ View ] |
If sleep deprivation and bad choices got me into this mess, sleep deprivation and bad choices are the only way out
3 replies 57 reposts 218 likes
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Frances Meh
@francesmeh.reviews
[ View ] |
exhuming the body of my phrenologist call that skullduggery
0 replies 6 reposts 23 likes
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d.ly
@dly.bsky.social
[ View ] |
once i said "crat" instead of "cat" that's why i'm like this
9 replies 25 reposts 83 likes
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Frances Meh
@francesmeh.reviews
[ View ] |
uh here i go here i go here i go again girls what’s my weakness (bladder)
0 replies 3 reposts 12 likes
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Sweetie π
@sixfeetofcandy.bsky.social
[ View ] |
My posts are not meant to be read they’re meant to be felt
5 replies 25 reposts 54 likes
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Frances Meh
@francesmeh.reviews
[ View ] |
fellas is it gay to think both cowboys should have been heath ledger
7 replies 19 reposts 78 likes
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d.ly
@dly.bsky.social
[ View ] |
hey i’m heading down to the oriental grocery store if anyone needs me to pick up anything oriental for them
12 replies 14 reposts 65 likes
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Theciscokidder
@theciscokidder.bsky.social
[ View ] |
It's been a very wet spring/summer for us after years of drought. I guess somebody finally found mother nature's clit.
5 replies 12 reposts 30 likes
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mean things I say to myself
@meantomyself.bsky.social
[ View ] |
This is how committed I am to being celibate
12 replies 18 reposts 101 likes
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𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚃𝚛𝚞𝚝𝚑
@unfitz.bsky.social
[ View ] |
All’s fair in love and war. TRANSLATION: Nothing’s fair in love and war.
1 replies 24 reposts 50 likes
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Frances Meh
@francesmeh.reviews
[ View ] |
recommending my dentist to a friend and asking for my referral bonus to be paid in teeth
4 replies 25 reposts 80 likes
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filth_waste
@filth-waste.bsky.social
[ View ] |
coworkers only get surly with you when they want to kiss
2 replies 11 reposts 30 likes
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lanyardigan
@lanyardigan.bsky.social
[ View ] |
(New Order and also Orgy voice) Weird Monday
0 replies 5 reposts 22 likes
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BrujoLoco☠️🖤🏺
@patnspankme.bsky.social
[ View ] |
if you want a visual, imagine the mashed potato pile from Close Encounters
1 replies 41 reposts 65 likes
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filth_waste
@filth-waste.bsky.social
[ View ] |
if you attempt to cover "blue (da ba dee)" for any reason i will find you and end your life
4 replies 5 reposts 30 likes
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Rachel
@slightlycaustic.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Boss: Do you like your job? (Threatening) Me: Not particularly. (Nonchalantly)
1 replies 5 reposts 22 likes
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Coach Rusty
@coachrusty.bsky.social
[ View ] |
My band in high school was called Extra Seconds On The Microwave and we were about as annoying as the name implies
7 replies 15 reposts 76 likes
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Jason, ex Inferis
@benedictsred.bsky.social
[ View ] |
That was just a regular accident to a freak like me
0 replies 33 reposts 73 likes
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Tusk Jenkins
@tuskjenkins.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Fortunes on kazoo paper, humming on cookies. "What. It's bring your parallel universe to leisure day."
1 replies 23 reposts 34 likes
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Johnny Normality (Feral Mode)
@probgobl.in
[ View ] |
You don't have to wait until Halloween to dress up as a mummy. You can just do that now and wrap yourself in bandages and wander around and vomit swarms of scarabs on people. You don't need October for that. You can turn their blood to black ichor with fell magicks in July. You're an adult, it's ok.
2 replies 74 reposts 264 likes
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Fulkery, A Thing Within Stuff
@fulkery.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I'm sure plenty of people have shouted "IS THE CORN OKAY?" I don't intend to be one of them.
0 replies 2 reposts 8 likes
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Rachel
@slightlycaustic.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I believe checking yo self before you wreck yourself has fallen out of fashion.
2 replies 13 reposts 37 likes
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BrujoLoco☠️🖤🏺
@patnspankme.bsky.social
[ View ] |
a couple hours at a good pinball machine would fix me
8 replies 55 reposts 113 likes
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Wilbur72
@wilbur72.bsky.social
[ View ] |
A big wave just hawk tuah’d me right out of the ocean
1 replies 12 reposts 28 likes
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Jim Zub
@jimzub.bsky.social
[ View ] |
This photo is pure 2024.
33 replies 1108 reposts 3968 likes
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CHOAM Nomsky 💭
@thielman.bsky.social
[ View ] |
By Sam Pink.
13 replies 260 reposts 1531 likes
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Stalled Traffic
@stalledtraffic.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Me: This spaghetti is *chef’s kiss* Chef: Can’t we ever get past first base?
2 replies 14 reposts 36 likes
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Stalled Traffic
@stalledtraffic.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Can’t go. Preparing for the 100-meter Running with Scissors Olympic trials.
1 replies 4 reposts 8 likes
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turbo jerry
@turbojerry.bsky.social
[ View ] |
*forcing myself to walk down the driveway to get the trash bins* me: i can’t live like this
6 replies 10 reposts 63 likes
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Wolfe Van Mural
@guytheguy.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Ok that was fun back to dependence
0 replies 22 reposts 78 likes
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Wolfe Van Mural
@guytheguy.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Take a bite of your McDonald’s sausage breakfast burrito every time you pass another McDonald’s
0 replies 6 reposts 11 likes