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Amanda Katz@katzish.bsky.social |
Hayes Brown: Haha, what if people still believed in omens and prophecies like in the ancient world An actual member of Congress:
86 replies 331 reposts 1444 likes
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Rob-in-New Mexico
@rob-in-newmexico.bsky.social
[ View ] |
No one, I tell you NO ONE, saw that eclipse coming!
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Amanda Katz
@katzish.bsky.social
[ View ] |
It's really hard to write satire when people, including elected officials, are so busy INHABITING THE PART
0 replies 1 reposts 109 likes
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solvognen
@solvognen.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Yeah, but 'Empty Vessel' Greene, though.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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𝑆𝓷𝝰𝐜𝘬𝜶𝑰𝗝а𝒄𝓀𝒶ℓ🔞🏳️🌈🇵🇸 (Coms Open)
@snackaljackal.bsky.social
[ View ] |
The fuck are we supposed to repent?
1 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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Phil Garnock-Jones 🇺🇦🎸
@theobrominated.bsky.social
[ View ] |
The irony is, if it wasn’t for science, she wouldn’t know there’s an eclipse coming.
0 replies 0 reposts 5 likes
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NutMeg
@casuallychaotic.bsky.social
[ View ] |
If Biden has been in office for the last three years, but as soon as Trump is named as the Republican nominee natural disasters start happening, what does this say about God's opinion on the political landscape?
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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The Store
@mudsludge.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Especially funny because eclipses are super predictable. "Ok so god will be mad at us on all these dates. I can tell because these are when eclipses happen"
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Caren with a C
@caren.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Repent for J6. Repent for harassing trans people. Repent for stripping human rights from women.
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Anders W.
@heat751.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Well to be fair, today is as good a day as any for her to repent.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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🇵🇸hungry🏳️🌈hungry🏳️⚧️harpy🇺🇦
@the17thqueen.bsky.social
[ View ] |
You first, MTG 😒
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Warren Terra
@warrenterra.bsky.social
[ View ] |
The idea that God is sending the eclipse as an omen in response to events is a real head scratcher when you consider the planning involved.
1 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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punwithwordz
@lexophile.bsky.social
[ View ] |
She belongs in an institution all right. Just not the US Congress.
0 replies 0 reposts 5 likes
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Lance Ellisor
@ellisor.bsky.social
[ View ] |
well, “the wrath of God” is “ira dei” in Latin, so maybe it is all the fault of woke
1 replies 2 reposts 11 likes
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Kategod 🐉🧿🦑𓅛🪬
@kategodart.bsky.social
[ View ] |
i got this image in my head of her stroking out during the climax of the eclipse
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Biohazard
@biohazardous.bsky.social
[ View ] |
It's funny how those omens are always the most self-interested take available. It's never an omen that the omen people are doing something wrong themselves, it's always an excuse to be crappy to the people they always want to be crappy to.
0 replies 0 reposts 11 likes
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LucieCatnip
@luciecatnip.bsky.social
[ View ] |
And here I was wondering what Pat Robertson would have to say about the earthquake. There you go.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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¯\_(ツ)_/¯
@pranish.bsky.social
[ View ] |
When do the cicadas come?
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Michael Broussard Arts
@michaelbroussard.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Her intelligence seems to diminish by the day. The hour. The minute. The second. Oop, there it goes again.
1 replies 0 reposts 4 likes
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Al Fartpee
@alfartpee.bsky.social
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That woman is so goddamn stupid she doesn’t even cast a shadow
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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サージャントヒッピー
@sgthippie.bsky.social
[ View ] |
What if these signs and omens mean that we need to turn away from sin and evil and stop electing Republicans.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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mjfgates
@mjfgates.bsky.social
[ View ] |
She's just freaking out because you can't get an AirBnB anywhere along the path of totality.
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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Frankie Huang 黄碧赤
@ourobororoboruo.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Omgggg
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Matthew Triponey
@matthewtriponey.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I was just telling one of my coworkers that a funny thing to do during the eclipse would be to hide in like a Walmart with a trumpet and wait until the exact second it starts to get dark.
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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@mtc1.bsky.social
[ View ] |
or even in the supernatural
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Shutdown Corner
@afrobatic.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I can't wait for her "bubble bubble, toil and trouble..." tweets. Epic!
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Mike McNasty
@cemeterywind.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Caveman Mike trembles.
1 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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Leigh Ann (adjunct tortured poet 🤍)
@latognetti.bsky.social
[ View ] |
These same people think it’s the end of the world every time there’s a lunar eclipse which happens ALL THE TIME
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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ShadeFawks 🏳️🌈🍰
@shadefawks.bsky.social
[ View ] |
A friendly reminder,MTG did not win her local election. Her opponent dropped due to threats to their family received online and in the mail. So she won by being unopposed.
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Sarah K
@purpliser.bsky.social
[ View ] |
What if this is why Republicans have been sacrificing so many children? Gotta be a fucked up god a-comin!
1 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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Mere
@thatmerecat.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Apollo, the gift of prophecy, etc
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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Mushroom Rogers
@rationalmethod.bsky.social
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Yes. The eclipse. The one that has been predicted to happen for hundreds of years. That god is one wily son of a bitch! Makes me wonder if they aren’t responsible for all of this happening.
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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Dr. Katharine Dickson
@metaomicsnerd.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I would say exile Marge to Japan but I don’t want to inflict her on them.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Brian Smith
@ambientrelish.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Dear America, Please don't repent until 2:15pm CDT on Monday. I want to see the total eclipse.
1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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CakeOrDeath
@deathorcake.bsky.social
[ View ] |
'I pray our country listens' ...and does what, Marjorie? Buys more guns? Elects a lying serial rapist and bankrupt as its president? Surely if we're relying on omens and auguries we should be sacrificing a few chickens or virgins to appease our vengeful god Virgins if wealthy, chickens if not
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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@dkleeds.bsky.social
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Haven’t you got a mega cicada plague on the way too. Big trouble if you ask me.
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Reed Noel
@aerius.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Jesus christ.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Wagatwe Wanjuki
@wagatwe.com
[ View ] |
white evangelicals always deliver
0 replies 0 reposts 12 likes
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Mitch Solomon
@mitchsolomon.bsky.social
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No argument. Marge should definitely repent
0 replies 0 reposts 7 likes
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Pwnallthethings
@pwnallthethings.bsky.social
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What if god is specifically asking her to repent
6 replies 0 reposts 100 likes
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Doug McCrae
@dougmccrae.bsky.social
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Distressing lack of specificity about the “many more things to come.” C’mon, Marjorie, if you know what God’s going to do then help out America’s emergency services and give us some details.
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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@boldmanchris.bsky.social
[ View ] |
The redolent paganism in the tweet from “Christian” Marge 3 Toes is something to behold
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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James Downie
@jamescdownie.bsky.social
[ View ] |
To pull back the curtain a little, Hayes was casting about for a new topic for his next piece, and then MTG just...tweeted it out.
0 replies 0 reposts 5 likes
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Cloud's Strife
@jmgreene28.bsky.social
[ View ] |
The kind of nonsense you can set your watch to.
1 replies 0 reposts 4 likes
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Nicholas Slayton
@nslayton.bsky.social
[ View ] |
2 replies 0 reposts 23 likes
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Devin𓅃
@devin-eleven.bsky.social
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MTG is basically working for the anti-christ and she's out there telling us to repent. How about she repents for that gym she desecrated while she was married.
0 replies 0 reposts 4 likes
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Michael Cain
@cainmac.bsky.social
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Don’t forget the locusts.
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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A new more dumber voyage
@omnisomni.bsky.social
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Didn't realize an event, eclipse, with predictable schedules and locations was an omen. In general passing geological timescale not matching up to human perception nonsense, it's not a matter of if it will happen, it's a matter of when.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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The Canadian Content (He/Him)
@psychofish77.bsky.social
[ View ] |
MTG is dangerously stupid.
0 replies 0 reposts 3 likes
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Dawa Zangpo
@dawazangpo.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Hmm, Back to the European Catholic Middle Ages.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Ms . Penny Oaken
@skywitches.net
[ View ] |
And now we go live to Lenny Bruce for a reaction
0 replies 0 reposts 4 likes
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Laughing Cavalier
@laughingcavalier.bsky.social
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To be fair, believe in a politicians these days or believe in God is not much of a difference.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Steve Brady
@stevebrady.bsky.social
[ View ] |
You know who could help you, Madge? This guy.... if you could get Drumpf to let go.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Ankylodad
@ankylodad.bsky.social
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Why can’t god be more specific? Good management is all about clear instruction. You can’t just fire off a draft and then get angry when your direct reports are fucking up 2000 years later.
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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Dr Seán DOOLAN
@sdinpraxis.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Remember when Trump hotels were hit by lightning and he STILL didn't get the hint?
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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@flatline42.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Madge Tadge Gadge is one of the effing rulers of America. If God is pissed at America, it's literally her fault.
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Daniel Brody
@danielwbrody.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Hmm Margie didn’t talk like that about the pandemic
2 replies 0 reposts 39 likes
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Nathaniel Leigh
@nathanielleighva.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I’m sure I’m beating a dead horse here but how does Greene still have a job? She is literally delusional. How has she not been declared mentally unfit?
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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YourPalPest
@presidentpesticide.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Still waiting for Tim pool to have his shitty take on the earthquakes and eclipse
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Estarianne
@estarianne.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Indeed, nobody could have predicted the eclipse. Very surprising.
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Max Alper
@lamemeyoung.bsky.social
[ View ] |
This and the red heifer freaks this month
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Barryzee
@barryzee.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I'm hoping that the people of Georgia repent of ever sending MTG to Congress. She is an embarrassment on so many levels.
1 replies 0 reposts 3 likes
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Kygosi
@kygosi.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Checks out, I can think of a few things MGT may want to repent for.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Angelo Zanola
@angelozanola.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Okay, I can kind of understand earthquakes, but how is an eclipse an omen anymore? We know when they are all going to happen and where they will be most visible. You know what a solar eclipse is an omen for? The next eclipse.
2 replies 0 reposts 32 likes
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Ashford
@ashokhotnik.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I wondered how long it would be before Attention Whore Barbie shoved her sanctimonious two cents in. Should have made a pool....
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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National Security Counselors 🕵
@natlseccnslrs.bsky.social
[ View ] |
you know it's not really a sign from God if you've known it was coming for hundreds of years
2 replies 1 reposts 3 likes
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Just Call Me Frank
@justcallmefrank.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Once again, Republicans thinking America is the only place that exists on earth, and therefore god cares only about it. 🙄 The narcissism is oozing and palpable.
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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@reddog2.bsky.social
[ View ] |
She should lead the way.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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RDS (formerly shawphd)
@rds773.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I can’t wait to hear what she thinks about cicadas
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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@vonhonkington.bsky.social
[ View ] |
She's welcome to begin repenting at any time, nobody is stopping her
0 replies 0 reposts 3 likes
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Sekhi, Booper of Snoots 🏳️🌈
@sekhithefops.bsky.social
[ View ] |
At least that dope is on the way out.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Tommy McElrath
@monotomidae.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I mean, she’s not wrong. America elected HER so … we’ve got a lot to repent for. 😜
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Rowdy
@rrrowdy.bsky.social
[ View ] |
The eclipse was known about decades in advance because scientific models of the solar system predicted it. Does she think the eclipse (that hasn't happened yet, but she is still aware that it is) is somehow a sudden act of God? That's rhetorical. Of course she does. What a dumb cunt. 🙄
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Rokey
@rokey.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I walked into an antiques shop in PA today and the owner greets us by making sure we knew about the earthquake and how it meant the End was nigh.
1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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(The sound of children screaming has been removed)
@tousledpigtails.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Plague of locusts on its way in a few short weeks with cicada convergence.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Frank
@fmacskasy.bsky.social
[ View ] |
But why can't "god" be sending a message she/he/it is angry with far-right conspiracy fruitcakes and MAGAs? If I was "god", I'd be pretty p*ssed at that congresswoman...
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Kevo
@psgamer92.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Most politicians when they say that I know they’re just using rhetoric for their base but with MTG it’s 50/50. Either way it’s more alarming about a third of Americans sincerely think like this.
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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@calizaybak.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Why don’t gods just talk to people any more? Or an oracle to at least provide some verbal instruction. I can’t speak earthquake!
0 replies 0 reposts 4 likes
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Lightning Fox
@lightningfox.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I will wave off the earthquake one since we can’t really predict them but the eclipses are so well understood I don’t know how anyone could possibly consider it an omen anymore
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Kathy
@kathing6of7.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Not like a literal plague didn’t happen 4 years ago either.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Anagram Doe
@anagramdoe.bsky.social
[ View ] |
0 replies 0 reposts 4 likes
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@alangisaac.bsky.social
[ View ] |
She does not seem to be listening ...
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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womp.le
@womplestiltskin.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I like how she assumes God’s message is for *other* people
4 replies 1 reposts 79 likes
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Marcas Ó Doibhilin
@marcasofadad.bsky.social
[ View ] |
MTG is right, you guys. And we can show our repentance to the Lord by flinging her into a volcano.
3 replies 0 reposts 8 likes
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jw
@farwent.net
[ View ] |
Oh no, Marjorie, the only way to save us is by jumping into a volcano, oh no
1 replies 1 reposts 20 likes
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Respice
@respice.bsky.social
[ View ] |
The earthquake was 5 miles from Trump's Bedminster golf club, and the eclipse crosses a suspiciously high percentage of red states. Just who does she think is being called to repent?
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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HenryHill1
@henryhill1.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Now she thinks she's pat robertson.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes