Orpheus Condescending

@maryscottoconnor.com

DO NOT DRINK THE TUDOR MILK

Sep 12, 2023 at 21:02 UTC

129 replies 1311 reposts 6017 likes

Owen @oweniverson.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 21:36 UTC

Only if it's been opened though

0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

Trendane - Voice Actor/Audiobook Narrator @trendane.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 21:44 UTC

I would only consume it if doing so would teach me Latin.

1 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

miguel ❤️ dogs 🐩 @hellomiguel.com
[ View ] Sep 13, 2023 at 00:17 UTC

sorry i'm already chugging it

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Befria Hongkong @befriahongkong.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 21:16 UTC

#hellfoods

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

@jennifervestal.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 22:54 UTC

I remember getting an panicked call from my son nine years ago: "Oh my God do you realize that the baby will arrive before the milk I bought today expires?!!!" I have never seen a realer reality check. 😂💕

0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

Rosanna Landis Weaver @landisweaver.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 13, 2023 at 14:26 UTC

It's like something out of a Ruth Galloway mystery.

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Mom Friend 64 @pengarr.postes.club
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 21:06 UTC

YOU'RE NOT MY REAL MOM

1 replies 0 reposts 16 likes

Frabjous Studios 🤩 Working on BANKWAVE @devs.frabjousstudios.com
[ View ] Sep 13, 2023 at 04:07 UTC

Tudor Milk: Just Say No.

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Meowlnir @meowlnir.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 21:58 UTC

I’m laughing way too hard at this omfg

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Machu Pikacchu @judet.bsky.social
[ View ] Dec 27, 2023 at 13:31 UTC

Hey, that’s good for like 94 years still if you use the Islamic calendar for the year. But for YHWH’s sake, do NOT use the Jewish calendar. Oy gevalt.

0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

Richard the Sod @dreamcastbarber.com
[ View ] Nov 28, 2023 at 11:40 UTC

This is why you should always take the time to read the USE BY date. I would have just skimmed it.

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Maura -resister @maurar.bsky.social
[ View ] Mar 23, 2024 at 16:22 UTC

Lol

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Paul D. Storrie @storrieville.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 21:07 UTC

🤣

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Prem @lincolm.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 22:26 UTC

Was thinking of buying one

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Rocky N. Bullwinkle @lproulx.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 21:27 UTC

Found in Hilary Mantel's fridge, no doubt. (too arcane/oblique, I know, but got nothing else)

2 replies 0 reposts 5 likes

elf™ @elfy.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 22:21 UTC

*guzzles milk, wants roasted turkey drumstick*

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Migs @ominoushallways.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 13, 2023 at 12:20 UTC

That is just a sell by date. Milk usually lasts 600 years.

0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

ScaryTwink™ 🔜gpn,EF @spottyserval.furry.energy
[ View ] Sep 13, 2023 at 07:53 UTC

Lmao

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Orpheus Condescending @maryscottoconnor.com
[ View ] May 31, 2024 at 09:57 UTC

Okay, this is ridiculous. 5,999 likes? I can't stand it. SOMEONE else has to click like on this motherfucker or I'm going to go insane staring at this.

3 replies 0 reposts 15 likes

Critical Russ Theory @russellgaleti.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 23:08 UTC

Francisco Pizarro-ass milk

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Exclamador @charlieviper.bsky.social
[ View ] Nov 28, 2023 at 13:38 UTC

WOW 😲😲😲

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Frank Reiser🌊🌈🌻💙💛⚜️ @frankreiser.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 13, 2023 at 00:03 UTC

Could it be 24 hour time tag, meaning 3:38PM?🤔

0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

Marie Guillotine @marieguillotine.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 22:21 UTC

That is no milk of human kindness, no.

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Cowboy Friday @thotstream.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 23:35 UTC

You Made A Banger

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Damnit Janet @damnitjanet.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 21:44 UTC

Doesn't even make sense in American

0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

William Shakespeare @shakespeare.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 21:18 UTC

And take my milk for gall, you murd’ring ministers

3 replies 2 reposts 105 likes

Shatter Ⓥ 𓅃 @shatter.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 23:40 UTC

Looks like something Charlie would find in the sewer and try to sell. #alwayssunny

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Pausanias apologist @etienned.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 21:20 UTC

The things that milk has seen would make you curdle

1 replies 0 reposts 13 likes

Pia Utö-Dysto @pia-utodysto.bsky.social
[ View ] Dec 27, 2023 at 10:57 UTC

I prefer Tuborg milk.

0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

David Grinyer @malonegranger.bsky.social
[ View ] Mar 23, 2024 at 16:21 UTC

🤣🤣🤣🤣

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Trepanning For Gold @rubydoomsday.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 25, 2023 at 12:27 UTC

out, out, damned clot!

0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

timmyneutron @timmyneutron.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 13, 2023 at 00:57 UTC

Don’t think of it as expired milk, think of it as free cheese 🧀

1 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

Sarah K @purpliser.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 21:34 UTC

"Now, Doctor Timeopolis, are you SURE that you don't want to visit Shakespeare yourself? Are you CERTAIN that a jug of milk will get the message across? I mean, we have one shot with the Time Hole so...."

0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

eyrieowl @eyrieowl.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 13, 2023 at 02:36 UTC

Milk of the aurochs, never goes bad

0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

Dom G 💖🥰💘 @domg.bsky.social
[ View ] May 02, 2024 at 23:18 UTC

Clearly aliens gave them the technology for plastic

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Emerence @damemyniah.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 22:47 UTC

But you must, FOR SCIENCE

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Justin White @jwhite.bsky.social
[ View ] May 30, 2024 at 03:56 UTC

Because they didn't have pasteurisation back then?

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Melodica Dude™ @melodicadude.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 22:12 UTC

i will drink it so my bones may gain the power of ages past and no one can stop me

0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

Large Buttes @buttes.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 13, 2023 at 00:00 UTC

you cant tell me what to do your not my real dad

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

KIMBLY💕✨ @k1m.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 23:34 UTC

Oh my

0 replies 0 reposts 4 likes

Brian Alston @milesofsmiles25.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 22:10 UTC

Careful, do NOT drink the Plague-Flavored milk--i believe that there might still be some around. I suspect it's spoiled...

0 replies 0 reposts 3 likes

RaphMikeyTurtle @raphmikey.bsky.social
[ View ] May 31, 2024 at 09:23 UTC

😂 no way

0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

Kath Ebooks @kathebooks.com
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 23:34 UTC

Lmao

0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

Aspartame Valerian @aspartame.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 13, 2023 at 01:02 UTC

How can I possibly decide whether or not to drink it without knowing if it was produced by sainted cows of the Church of England or papist cows?

0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

BBQdotgov @bbqdotgov.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 21:13 UTC

Tudor Milk feels like a creepy cosplay euphemism

1 replies 0 reposts 6 likes

✡️Sarcastic Barbie לֵאָה (tradwife arc)👩🏽‍🦽 @sarcasticbarbie.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 13, 2023 at 03:49 UTC

When you’re really committed to period pieces and method acting Jared Leto has been physically restrained from downing it in order to method act his way into queen Catherine

1 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

GG @gentleg.bsky.social
[ View ] Feb 19, 2024 at 21:15 UTC

It’s been 5 months since you post it… you can drink it now.

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Bertie @flirtram.bsky.social
[ View ] Oct 14, 2023 at 14:48 UTC

They say to ignore sell by dates these days. I mean 500 odd years shouldn’t make that much difference…….

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Domus Vocis | (N)SFW Furry Author @domusvocis.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 13, 2023 at 02:07 UTC

I cannot even imagine the smell of 500 year old milk. 🤢

2 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Gerald @xedregulus.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 23:46 UTC

But it tastes like excommunication!

0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

AV Hiero @avhiero.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 21:49 UTC

It's fine, food doesn't actually go bad. Expiration dates are just a conspiracy by Big Food to get you to buy more food.

0 replies 0 reposts 5 likes

Zoomer Antimillenarian @surcomplicated.bsky.social
[ View ] Dec 27, 2023 at 06:01 UTC

@dankaszeta.bsky.social is this a chemical weapon or something worse? Inquiring minds want to know.

1 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

Harry__is__here @harryishere.bsky.social
[ View ] May 30, 2024 at 06:27 UTC

Is that why he came up with the quote: To die, to sleep – to sleep, perchance to dream?

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Manny Coulon @mannyc.bsky.social
[ View ] Dec 27, 2023 at 09:21 UTC

@tudorfoodrecipe.bsky.social 👀🙈😅

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Pierre @baldyman990.bsky.social
[ View ] Mar 23, 2024 at 17:22 UTC

archaeologists worldwide in confusion...

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Nightingale!🇵🇸🇺🇦🇾🇪 @nightingale57.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 22:27 UTC

*proceeds to chug the entire thing*

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Winter Queen Cinnamon 🏳️‍⚧️ @queencinnamon.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 13, 2023 at 07:37 UTC

Surely you'd have to tu-don milk that old.

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Mikey Minus One (on Netflix) plus Medicare 📽️ @mikeymcfilms.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 22:26 UTC

That’s a keeper

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Big Fat Bartolo's Colon @bigfatbartolocolon.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 22:21 UTC

@danaschwartz.bsky.social we need an ep of Noble Blood about this milk

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Mr Snodes @mrsnodes.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 21:38 UTC

Gonna be ruff

1 replies 0 reposts 7 likes

Tom (kid codger) O'Neill @doctecazoid.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 13, 2023 at 02:23 UTC

Bet the school system would still serve it to the second graders.

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Martin Nutbeem @martinnutbeem.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 21:05 UTC

Yessssss. Drink ittttttttt.

0 replies 0 reposts 6 likes

Norb Aikin @norbaikin.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 13, 2023 at 01:12 UTC

Personally, I've always preferred four door milk. I'll see myself out.

3 replies 0 reposts 13 likes

Lucy 🍉 @lucyjustacointoss.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 13, 2023 at 15:38 UTC

😅

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Bullwinker @bullwinker.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 13, 2023 at 02:50 UTC

I did. But it was a long time ago.

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Lizzie Borden @goostie.bsky.social
[ View ] Feb 19, 2024 at 21:20 UTC

At this point would it not just be a very, very strangely aged and old cheese?

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

@iantencate.bsky.social
[ View ] Jan 21, 2024 at 19:17 UTC

I'm as impressed that the alternative reading is that they know the precise minute it will turn sour - 3:38 in the afternoon!

0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

CarlyJA22 @carlyja22.bsky.social
[ View ] Oct 14, 2023 at 14:22 UTC

Yikes!!

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Ben Caffe 🇩🇪🇳🇱🇺🇲🇺🇦🇮🇱 💙💛🄽🄰🄵🄾 💙⚽ @bj.caffe.network
[ View ] Sep 15, 2023 at 11:51 UTC

So much for quality control.

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Holden vs The Internet @holdendisperra.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 13, 2023 at 01:41 UTC

Maryscott with the banger post

1 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

@Tarbosaur @tarbosaur.bsky.social
[ View ] Nov 28, 2023 at 15:01 UTC

No wonder Henry VIII had a gamey leg.

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Patrixmyth @patri.xyz
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 21:02 UTC

That's just the sell by date, you have to smell it to see if it's bad! (or haunted)

0 replies 0 reposts 27 likes

Zero @squarezer0.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 16, 2023 at 00:16 UTC

And drink water, befouled by plague as it is in these trying times? No thank you!

0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

Gareth Oakland 🇫🇷🏏🏉 @goakl.bsky.social
[ View ] Nov 28, 2023 at 12:21 UTC

I think you’ll need to dissolve that in something monastic like chartreuse.

1 replies 0 reposts 5 likes

Poor Rigney’s Almanac @observations.bsky.social
[ View ] Oct 14, 2023 at 05:54 UTC

I thought it tasted funny.

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Kip Williams sort of @kipwilliams.bsky.social
[ View ] Nov 28, 2023 at 12:40 UTC

Ho ho! They meant 1938.

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Salty MacTavish @saltymactavish.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 21:11 UTC

Loleth

0 replies 0 reposts 16 likes

Bruce Harry @bruceharry.bsky.social
[ View ] Feb 01, 2024 at 11:22 UTC

Liquid Cheese?!?

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Ann Lavendar @lavendar.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 21:22 UTC

Brilliant

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Gary @garychapple.bsky.social
[ View ] Dec 27, 2023 at 07:21 UTC

The gradual transition to the Gregorian calendar wreaked havoc with Best Before dates.

0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

Nicolas Goy @kuon.ch
[ View ] Sep 13, 2023 at 09:36 UTC

What kind of container is that? Looks huge. And also kinda transparent.

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Jarrell lives in the woods @jarrellwoods.bsky.social
[ View ] Oct 14, 2023 at 11:03 UTC

Actually, it might be safe after this long.

1 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

Drac @dracnoiseperson.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 13, 2023 at 14:34 UTC

😬

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Tero Kuittinen @teroterotero.bsky.social
[ View ] Dec 26, 2023 at 21:26 UTC

It’s gonna make you hustle like Anne Seymour

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

djdwight @djdwight.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 21:46 UTC

will now you know why i am who i am

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

TheDoktur @thedoktur.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 13, 2023 at 00:31 UTC

Perhaps that jug was supposed to be delivered to SCOTUS Alito?

0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

Bryan Blessed @bryb.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 21:22 UTC

One of my absolute favourite factoids is that Al Capone invented food expiry dates.

2 replies 1 reposts 29 likes

Alan Bleiweiss @alanbleiweiss.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 13, 2023 at 00:07 UTC

Good advice! To be fair, this confirms how long plastic lasts and why it's a serious problem for the environment!

0 replies 0 reposts 6 likes

Linux Rocks! @linuxstillrocks.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 22:47 UTC

lol

0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

@moriartystjames.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 21:51 UTC

And what should I drink while lathing arsenic and lead upon the face of my monarch?

1 replies 0 reposts 6 likes

Pyrholidon Enthusiast ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) @pyrholidon.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 21:37 UTC

forbidden dairy

0 replies 0 reposts 3 likes

ARadSkullMug @spitandtears.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 21:09 UTC

One wonders how this artifact ended up in Michigan (?)

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

@garybutler.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 13, 2023 at 06:40 UTC

If it's good enough for Henry VIII, then it's good enough for you.

0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

Zeit Wolverine @zeitwolverine.mustelid.party
[ View ] May 02, 2024 at 12:44 UTC

That milk is ancient!

0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

JayMo @waymojaymo.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 21:36 UTC

Worst family heirloom, ever.

0 replies 0 reposts 12 likes

Edward Anderson📽️ @readwryt.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 13, 2023 at 23:59 UTC

Well, I learned something about algorithms just now. I searched for "What happened in the 1530s?", and the first thing Google offered was a Wikipedia entry called "The 1530s", and when I clicked on it it took me directly to 1538, so this picture is causing some activity I guess...

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

CrackedLemonade @crackedlemonade.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 12, 2023 at 23:58 UTC

Damn the like number is higher than the year on ye olde bottle

1 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

Weedleplop @weedleplop.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 13, 2023 at 12:56 UTC

Or it could be an incredibly precise time code - this milk is fine now but by the time the shop shuts it will have expired.

0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

Ford, The Punslinger @inferknow.co
[ View ] Nov 29, 2023 at 03:33 UTC

TASTE MY POWER (CHUNKS)

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

@roseorchid.bsky.social
[ View ] Sep 13, 2023 at 00:36 UTC

Thoust ancestors doest stealeth my milk and left me with thy worthy reputation ast Bilious Bale. When truly thy grumpiness wast a lack of moisture on mine cornflakes. ~ John Bale

0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes