batkaren's avatar

batkaren

@batkaren.bsky.social

2648 followers 229 following 1107 posts

my mom fucked a bat

just my bullshit: bsky.app/profile/did:plc:6ljac3gxzqxy56fhx7qu3jqd/feed/aaali652rhjzc

batkaren's avatar batkaren @batkaren.bsky.social
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unsubscribe

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

batkaren's avatar batkaren @batkaren.bsky.social
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Go on, show me where in the bible it says Thou Shall Not Eat Butt.

1 replies 3 reposts 15 likes

batkaren's avatar batkaren @batkaren.bsky.social
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Can’t I just text the Ghostbusters?

2 replies 8 reposts 27 likes

batkaren's avatar batkaren @batkaren.bsky.social
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Stop doing things for shits and giggles. You’re just making the Shits and Giggles Fairy stronger. Hungrier…

0 replies 22 reposts 58 likes

Reposted by batkaren

lanyardigan's avatar lanyardigan @lanyardigan.bsky.social
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And now the eternal question: a plain bagel with cream cheese or a blueberry muffin the size of my head

7 replies 12 reposts 64 likes

Reposted by batkaren

Reposted by batkaren

Woodrow Peel 🆗🆒's avatar Woodrow Peel 🆗🆒 @woodyluvscoffee.bsky.social
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My crow brought back the shiny pinky ring of a mobster and now we’re on the run.

2 replies 11 reposts 48 likes

Reposted by batkaren

Ennui Doofen's avatar Ennui Doofen @ennuidoofen.bsky.social
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Docs ask how many concussions you had/when they happened and it's like c'mon all I know is that I got hit a lot in my memory spot

14 replies 71 reposts 183 likes

batkaren's avatar batkaren @batkaren.bsky.social
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Emily still had so much to figure out about the character at that developmental stage

0 replies 0 reposts 4 likes

batkaren's avatar batkaren @batkaren.bsky.social
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She had a great writer’s ear for what worked and didn’t

1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes

batkaren's avatar batkaren @batkaren.bsky.social
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‘Dark and brooding, Heathcliff stared across the misty moors and muttered, “I hate Mondays, but damn I love lasagna.”’ Emily crumpled up the paper. No. Something just wasn’t working.

5 replies 20 reposts 82 likes

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Johnny Normality (Feral Mode)'s avatar Johnny Normality (Feral Mode) @probgobl.in
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You don't have to wait until Halloween to dress up as a mummy. You can just do that now and wrap yourself in bandages and wander around and vomit swarms of scarabs on people. You don't need October for that. You can turn their blood to black ichor with fell magicks in July. You're an adult, it's ok.

2 replies 74 reposts 264 likes

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chris.'s avatar chris. @azedand2knots.bsky.social
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New setting just dropped: nobody can reply except for your mom.

4 replies 45 reposts 92 likes

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Cap’n Watsisname's avatar Cap’n Watsisname @capnwatsisname.bsky.social
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Sometimes I can feel it taking up space, that little cluster in my brain still trying to decide whether to run for 7th Grade Homeroom Representative

1 replies 26 reposts 56 likes

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Normal Pru's avatar Normal Pru @prufrockluvsong.bsky.social
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Hoping to get rich or famous today so consequences will no longer apply to me

3 replies 35 reposts 91 likes

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Princess of Whales's avatar Princess of Whales @princessofwhales2.bsky.social
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I’ve been thinking lately and that’s been a terrible decision

2 replies 65 reposts 140 likes

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Hi, it’s Abby. Yep.'s avatar Hi, it’s Abby. Yep. @abbycohenwl.bsky.social
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Your honor, you’re a tool of the man

1 replies 18 reposts 61 likes

batkaren's avatar batkaren @batkaren.bsky.social
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Stop doing things for shits and giggles. You’re just making the Shits and Giggles Fairy stronger. Hungrier…

0 replies 22 reposts 58 likes

Reposted by batkaren

Space Moddity's avatar Space Moddity @doktormod.bsky.social
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*digging through an old box of junk* Dangit! I never did get this haunted VHS tape digitized

0 replies 2 reposts 13 likes

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Xena: Warrior Princess's avatar Xena: Warrior Princess @prof-hinkley.bsky.social
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I've watched enough of the Tour de France that I think I could do it

2 replies 6 reposts 31 likes

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Mary Gillis's avatar Mary Gillis @marygillis.bsky.social
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Interesting how "respect for the dead" only ever means "don't mention the horrible things powerful people did in their obituaries" and never means "don't dig up dead celebrities and puppeteer their corpses for fun and profit".

4 replies 21 reposts 58 likes

batkaren's avatar batkaren @batkaren.bsky.social
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One awkward aspect of The Handmaid’s Tale becoming reality now is how the names will all be like Ofchad and Ofdylan. Maybe an Oftucker or Ofblane. Ofspencer.

4 replies 5 reposts 37 likes

batkaren's avatar batkaren @batkaren.bsky.social
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Happy Final Independence Day

0 replies 8 reposts 45 likes

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Royotathon🚘's avatar Royotathon🚘 @royotathon.bsky.social
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you expect ME to pay bills? me. a former baby. you sound insane right now.

9 replies 124 reposts 516 likes

batkaren's avatar batkaren @batkaren.bsky.social
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Better get my shopping in for the big day!

1 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

batkaren's avatar batkaren @batkaren.bsky.social
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[shaking fist] WHY WON’T THEY SHARE

1 replies 0 reposts 5 likes

batkaren's avatar batkaren @batkaren.bsky.social
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I gave it about 10 seconds of silence, just hanging in the air between us, before I said “and how would I retrieve the key from the mailbox?” The woman was just like “oh. Right.”

0 replies 1 reposts 20 likes

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mave's avatar mave @mave.bsky.social
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me: time to check in online and see what merriment is afoot online: here’s a horrifying tale you can do nothing about

0 replies 42 reposts 148 likes

batkaren's avatar batkaren @batkaren.bsky.social
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Just remembering the time I moved into a new apartment and the management company forgot to leave me a mailbox key, then when I called about it, they offered to mail it to me 😒

3 replies 12 reposts 65 likes

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🅿️rofessor Kiosk 💊's avatar 🅿️rofessor Kiosk 💊 @professorkiosk.bsky.social
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Mike's Hard Problem of Consciousness

4 replies 40 reposts 101 likes

batkaren's avatar batkaren @batkaren.bsky.social
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The kids would disagree with you

0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes

batkaren's avatar batkaren @batkaren.bsky.social
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It’s his enormous ass cavity, The New Yorker.

2 replies 2 reposts 28 likes

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Frovo's avatar Frovo @frovo.bsky.social
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Teacher: remember class, there are no stupid questions Me: *raises hand* Teacher: no stupid questions i said Me: *lowers hand*

2 replies 50 reposts 195 likes

batkaren's avatar batkaren @batkaren.bsky.social
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The last thing you want to do is hold Daleks accountable for their exterminations. It will only make them angrier and more exterminatey.

1 replies 5 reposts 24 likes

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Christina, mother of spiders's avatar Christina, mother of spiders @aikiwomannc.bsky.social
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Thinking about becoming a monk just for those sweet long hoodies.

3 replies 22 reposts 48 likes

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The Volatile Mermaid 's avatar The Volatile Mermaid @ohnoshetwitnt.bsky.social
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Celebrating our independence from a monarchy while on the brink of a dictatorship feels unsettling. Like when you get a birthday reminder on Facebook for one of your friends who’s dead.

5 replies 115 reposts 495 likes

batkaren's avatar batkaren @batkaren.bsky.social
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It’s definitely no longer sustainable

0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes

batkaren's avatar batkaren @batkaren.bsky.social
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A soothing computer voice states: “Simulation iteration approaching imminent collapse.”

1 replies 8 reposts 28 likes

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Uncle Jeff 🏳️‍🌈's avatar Uncle Jeff 🏳️‍🌈 @picklerudd.bsky.social
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I say let the cockroaches have it. They can't do worse

1 replies 10 reposts 31 likes