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Thurlinda found out...@tickystacky.bsky.social |
150 followers 140 following 125 posts
Stuff starts out not making sense, so I sensitize it. 🏳️⚧️
This is opium in a disco room.
bsky.app/profile/did:plc:7bv2ca3yawj662o7qxd5xyt7/feed/aaamnliwe64w4
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Shade 5
@shade5.bsky.social
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When presented with both a self checkout and a cashier lane simaltaneously, I never know which to use. Does the cashier want me to choose their lane to validate the job or are they thinking “bro just use the self checkout and leave me alone”. I struggle with this.
12 replies 30 reposts 86 likes
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Damnit Janet
@damnitjanet.bsky.social
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You might see squalor, I call it low maintenance
2 replies 23 reposts 46 likes
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Damnit Janet
@damnitjanet.bsky.social
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A new guy at my work is a constant tuneless hummer. The arsehole beside him is getting more and more irritated. I'm just over here watching with my earphones in, considering starting to whistle
2 replies 16 reposts 37 likes
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Secretly Jay
@secretjay.bsky.social
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Being gored by Bambi's estranged father was a very real fear for 5 year old me.
0 replies 6 reposts 14 likes
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yoyo
@deadgirlyoyo.bsky.social
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canadians.. this 4th of july, take a moment to remind your american friends that in 1812, we kicked their asses back across the border.
1 replies 8 reposts 26 likes
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PAM!
@pamtoo.bsky.social
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Baby, be the still frozen inside corndog of my heart, Baby.
0 replies 20 reposts 32 likes
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PAM!
@pamtoo.bsky.social
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Time for a Pam's Fashion Report: Lotta floral sundresses, fishnets and Doc Martens. Lotta crochet. Lotta what I can only call "Goth Rainbow Bright". (furrows brow) There's either too much or too little therapy here.
0 replies 7 reposts 23 likes
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PAM!
@pamtoo.bsky.social
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I think about you a lot, but not incessantly. Sometimes thinking about hot fudge.
2 replies 27 reposts 58 likes
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Sarco
@sarco.bsky.social
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Warning Warning your shit is not together. Your shit is currently spread out further than the per square kilometer population density of canada
1 replies 21 reposts 37 likes
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Sarco
@sarco.bsky.social
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Not now mom I'm trying to buy an '87 chrysler lebaron using air miles and an assortment of canned goods
0 replies 12 reposts 29 likes
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Sarco
@sarco.bsky.social
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Calm like a bomb (sarcastically)
0 replies 8 reposts 17 likes
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Dude
@prosaic.bsky.social
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2 replies 3 reposts 10 likes
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Dude
@prosaic.bsky.social
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0 replies 1 reposts 3 likes
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bacon popsicle 😳
@gupton68.bsky.social
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If you’ve ever sat on the same toilet seat as your boss or mother-in-law you’re ass BFFs and there’s nothing you can do to change that.
3 replies 40 reposts 74 likes
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bacon popsicle 😳
@gupton68.bsky.social
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Time for shit to get real! ~ me after drinking a quart of prune juice
0 replies 23 reposts 38 likes
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bacon popsicle 😳
@gupton68.bsky.social
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me: one mixed emotions please, barkeep barkeep: I don’t know what that is me: you put all my hopes and dreams and happiness and sadness and loneliness and insecurities in the cocktail mixer and give it a good, hard shake barkeep: me: ᵖˡᵉᵃˢᵉ ʰᵒˡᵈ ᵐᵉ
1 replies 41 reposts 91 likes
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Wicked Ho
@nicebutnot.bsky.social
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today i had a zoom therapy appointment where i cried and ate noodles with my bare hands on camera and she didn’t even blink
26 replies 65 reposts 471 likes
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Wicked Ho
@nicebutnot.bsky.social
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it’s possible that i have crossed the line from cute-bitchy to bitchy-bitchy
20 replies 56 reposts 171 likes
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Wicked Ho
@nicebutnot.bsky.social
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everyone is fighting some kind of battle sucker punch them while they’re focused on the other battle
16 replies 126 reposts 469 likes
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Juiceticles
@juiceticles.bsky.social
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Looking forward to cognitive decline like it's my turn on the Slip 'N Slide.
0 replies 11 reposts 21 likes
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La Captain Oblivious
@whatthefoxy.bsky.social
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If I slide in y’all’s DMs, just know I’m most likely sitting on the toilet.
18 replies 40 reposts 102 likes
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Pot Shop Boy
@potshopboy.bsky.social
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🎵 I think I'm a drone now I'm always way up high Above the ground
2 replies 15 reposts 28 likes
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Wolfe Van Mural
@guytheguy.bsky.social
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headed to a memorial service how can I make it all about me?
5 replies 13 reposts 32 likes
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Haiku Platypus
@haikuplatypus.bsky.social
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I talk to strangers in real life too. We are so much hidden beauty.
1 replies 27 reposts 50 likes
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Haiku Platypus
@haikuplatypus.bsky.social
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Be grateful I am just a few dumb words to you. I am too much work.
3 replies 21 reposts 41 likes
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Eric Replatformed
@21stcenturyeric.bsky.social
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It is a fine line between "My Outlook is synching" and "my outlook is sinking".
0 replies 5 reposts 16 likes
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Eric Replatformed
@21stcenturyeric.bsky.social
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On a good day I feel like the last guy down at the end of the bench on the worst team in the minor leagues.
0 replies 6 reposts 11 likes
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Eric Replatformed
@21stcenturyeric.bsky.social
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Ever since I heard about the downfall of the largest empire in pre-Columbian America, I have been incan-solable.
0 replies 8 reposts 25 likes
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Twin Dad
@twinsurvivalist.bsky.social
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Hay girl, hay! …I say as I point out piles of dried grass.
2 replies 9 reposts 22 likes
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Twin Dad
@twinsurvivalist.bsky.social
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Just know if you mention Istanbul at any time, no matter what comes next I will be humming “was Constantinople now it’s Istanbul not Constantinople…” in my head.
2 replies 7 reposts 18 likes
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Twin Dad
@twinsurvivalist.bsky.social
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Before the internet we all had that one friend who knew a guy who had a cousin that derailed a train by putting coins on the tracks.
1 replies 15 reposts 32 likes
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Thurlinda found out...
@tickystacky.bsky.social
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She has my new favorite eyebrow! 😍
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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Corduroy Cheddar
@corduroycheddar.bsky.social
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He was brought back alive as he lived. As a zombie feeling dead inside.
0 replies 5 reposts 9 likes
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Corduroy Cheddar
@corduroycheddar.bsky.social
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If I were president of the United States, I would be as surprised as you are
1 replies 8 reposts 25 likes
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Corduroy Cheddar
@corduroycheddar.bsky.social
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Without downloading new pics, what is it like dating you?
0 replies 1 reposts 7 likes
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bacon popsicle 😳
@gupton68.bsky.social
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me at 4 yrs old: *wants to be Batman, picks up a stick and pretends it’s a batarang* me at 54: *wants to be Batman, buys a Prius and cargo pants and pretends it’s the Batmobile and a utility belt*
1 replies 24 reposts 59 likes
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Thurlinda found out...
@tickystacky.bsky.social
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I only had enough money to have one eyebrow waxed so I had my left brow done because it's my favorite.
1 replies 17 reposts 27 likes
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Salty MacTavish
@saltymactavish.bsky.social
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That one handsaw has tasted blood before and it will again
3 replies 19 reposts 47 likes
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🦊 foxy99, a spry 99yr old fox
@foxy99.bsky.social
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This July the 4th I’ll be celebrating the possibility of being thrown off a roof come November.
0 replies 5 reposts 11 likes
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Lizzy 💫
@stonedeva.bsky.social
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Perplexing if literal: getting your ass handed to you
7 replies 56 reposts 113 likes
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Frovo
@frovo.bsky.social
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Wife: why is there a cow in our garage Me: that's our new lawn mooer Wife: Me: Wife: Me: he's going to cud the grass
3 replies 34 reposts 209 likes
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Jake_Vig
@jakevig.bsky.social
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"Crime and Punishment" now just "Crime"
11 replies 83 reposts 364 likes
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Pot Shop Boy
@potshopboy.bsky.social
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How many enchiladas have to be squeezed to make one can of enchilada sauce? What a waste of perfectly good enchiladas.
2 replies 30 reposts 83 likes
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Chaotic Moon
@chaoticmoon.bsky.social
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My so-called life is the equivalent of doing the lunge back and forth next to a snapping jump rope, waiting for the rhythm to be right before stepping in.
0 replies 7 reposts 16 likes
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Hourly Otters
@otters.hourly.media
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1 replies 1 reposts 8 likes
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𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚃𝚛𝚞𝚝𝚑
@unfitz.bsky.social
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I run with a rock in case I ever have to defeat someone running with scissors.
13 replies 64 reposts 197 likes
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Jason, ex Inferis
@benedictsred.bsky.social
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July 4th is the only day of the year when losing a finger to a chainsaw is “the boring way”
3 replies 25 reposts 90 likes
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Uncle Duke
@uncleduke1969.bsky.social
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“Pepperidge Farm remembers.”
4 replies 21 reposts 75 likes
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Splendid Hobo
@splendidhobo.bsky.social
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I'd have more followers but they're so hard to dust
1 replies 19 reposts 36 likes