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ex-Lethality Jane@lethalityjane.bsky.social |
The hill I will die on is that this is not a digital problem. We don't send younger kids out to play by themselves anymore for fear of kidnapping/CPS, and those kids become teens who don't do it either. There's also a loss of third spaces for teens. Even the freaking malls require chaperones.
188 replies 813 reposts 3652 likes
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siouxsieandthebansheesofinisherin 🏳️⚧️
@padz1312.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Wow its almost as if these teens spent years of their lives being warned not to go outside
1 replies 0 reposts 4 likes
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Dr Jim PhD RDPsych
@jamesbicycle.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Suburbia where there's no where to go except by car in lollipop and rainbow street maps. Stroads that are uncomfortable to walk or cycle when they're not dangerous. Partly blame tech-media saturation for most common child MH emotional diagnoses change to anxiety disorders over my 40 yrs of practice.
0 replies 0 reposts 3 likes
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Dr Jim PhD RDPsych
@jamesbicycle.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Driving kids everywhere. Because there's no destinations to walk or actively travel to in suburbia. Stroads that are uncomfortable to walk or cycle when they're not damn dangerous.
0 replies 0 reposts 5 likes
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mx. butlertron
@butlertron.bsky.social
[ View ] |
100%
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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muttonchopsyaz.bsky.social
@muttonchopsyaz.bsky.social
[ View ] |
It could be both, but doesn't the timing line up to correlate at least to an extent with smart phones?
1 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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JFG
@jfgibson.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I honestly don’t see not going out as much as a problem. I would have loved not going out as often but it was the only way you could connect with friends and there was never anywhere to go in the burbs except movies or the mall. 1/2
1 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Gemini
@gemdrgn.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I think my sister would have like... 5 fewer friends if the mall had been a closed space when she was growing up
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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BoulderSizedBoulder ✡️🇺🇦
@rocksizedrock.bsky.social
[ View ] |
This isn't a digital problem it's a cost/ danger from Gun nutters & authoritarian problem.
0 replies 0 reposts 3 likes
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Benny6Toes
@benny6toes.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I think it also friends on what you mean by, "going out with friends." I was lucky to have a bunch of kids on my block when i was a kid, and we spent a lot of time at each other's homes doing stuff but not necessarily "going out". Is that different than what's shown in the graph?
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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Stephen C. Rea
@stevierea.bsky.social
[ View ] |
💯 @zephoria.bsky.social has a great analysis of this and its historical development in chapter 8 of “It’s Complicated” (and also chapter 4):
0 replies 1 reposts 7 likes
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JR Smith 🦀
@abysmallytall.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I'm only surprised it didn't drop sooner. - someone who was a pre-teen when Columbine happened. (and everything else you said)
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Sean MacGillivray
@macg1llivray.bsky.social
[ View ] |
It's significant how much of young social interaction happens in video games now, too.
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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@ponedaddy1990.bsky.social
[ View ] |
We had teen nights at local nightclubs when I was a teen. As an adult, I have nothing to do in my community. I can't fathom being a teen right now.
0 replies 0 reposts 3 likes
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NutMeg
@casuallychaotic.bsky.social
[ View ] |
A friend of mine tried opening a drop in social centre in an old abandoned movie theatre. They were gazumped by a restaurant chain who wanted to convert it into an eatery instead. They hadn't done their homework about the renovations required, and the site was left undeveloped until it burnt down.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Ralph
@ralphhhenson.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Black parents fear KIDNAPPING? More likely police shootings. Behavior changes in about 2008 impacted black and white kid almost identically and that change likely can be traced back to social media.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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mtutt.bsky.social
@mtutt.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Geezer here, we wandered all over town at 6, 7, 8 yrs old, parents had no idea where we were, didn’t care. It was perfectly normal, no one thought anything of it. The world is no more dangerous today than it was then, we should go back to those days.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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ex-Lethality Jane
@lethalityjane.bsky.social
[ View ] |
There's been a huge movement towards infantilizing teenagers instead of moving them towards independence. I see a ton of people online saying how horrible it is for teens to work part time when they're in school. Having a part-time job was super common when I was a kid.
26 replies 40 reposts 681 likes
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Tim Onion
@bencollins.bsky.social
[ View ] |
When everything is loitering, hanging out is literally against the law.
3 replies 8 reposts 141 likes
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steeb
@stevewonderbelt.bsky.social
[ View ] |
The big irony is that kidnappings by strangers has always been much less likely than kidnappings by family and acquaintances. Like, it's good to stay vigilant obviously, but it seems like the social hysteria around "stranger danger" was never really justified.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Relentless
@relentless.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Calling it a problem indicates this is not the result of decades of very intentional work.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Forsagebone
@forsagebone.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Actual boomer crap that happened recently: some kids were playing in the neighborhood and Grumpa came out yelling, telling them to be quiet and go home. And they wonder why they're on their phones most of the time.
0 replies 0 reposts 3 likes
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Forsagebone
@forsagebone.bsky.social
[ View ] |
These people want to monitor their kids' sleepovers, or even outright don't want them to, yet they got the audacity to say "it's a digital problem"? What is with these people's brains?
0 replies 2 reposts 11 likes
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Dave on Blooski
@objectdave.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Also cars. We've sacrificed so much for driving convenience.
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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ManhattanJuryAppreciator
@ratelimitexceeder.bsky.social
[ View ] |
The Internet certainly creates a lot of replacement level social interaction but our public spaces increasingly filling out with 50-somethings who don't like loud kids relegates those loud kids to Xbox and Tiktok. The attitude even carries to college towns.
0 replies 1 reposts 30 likes
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Charles Bastille
@charlesbastille.bsky.social
[ View ] |
When I was a kid we played kick the can until dark without parental supervision. I was in third grade. Nobody died. When I was in high school, I was never home. My parents were happy with that.
0 replies 0 reposts 3 likes
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JustinSmithArt
@justinsmithart.bsky.social
[ View ] |
As a kid in the 80s, we were bombarded with the idea that everyone you don’t know wants to kidnap & molest you, so stay close to home! As a teen in the 90s, I was always getting harassed by cops and neighbors for existing outside, unless it was for a sport that didn’t make old people uncomfortable
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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Ramen Junkie
@ramenjunkie.bsky.social
[ View ] |
When I was a kid in the 80s, my friends and I would regularly run around the entire neighborhood with plastic guns playing war. I can't even imagine that ever being able to happen these days. Some random person would probably have shot us or called the police daily.
3 replies 0 reposts 19 likes
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Chris Miller
@iamcurious.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Bring back the old fashioned TV Party!!
youtu.be/a6otjCKg594?...
0 replies 0 reposts 3 likes
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The Pumpkin Dipshit
@pumpkinpal.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Screen time didn't cause the death of going out, it filled the gap left by it
2 replies 23 reposts 195 likes
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Maddy
@fullofwhoa.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Also, I realize things may have improved a bit but Houston is like the capital of car dependency. In places with great public transit and walkability/bikeability, teens might have the *independence* to go out.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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editR
@editr.bsky.social
[ View ] |
my parents would kick me out of the house after dinner and tell me not to come home until dark.
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Subscribe to my OnlyFangs
@pawcelot.com
[ View ] |
As someone who grew up in the 80s and 90s this seems nuts to me, and a huge overreaction to a problem that I suspect is no more prevalent now than it was then. I guess it's easier for the media to scare people than to actually inform them. I feel sorry for the kids who have to deal with this shit.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Sean Kirkland
@semifraki.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I talk about this with my kid's friends' parents. Her best friend lives 2 blocks away, and she has a sister that's 3 years older. I've asked "how old will they be before we feel comfortable opening the door and having them walk to each other's house?" Neither of us can come up with a good answer.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Yassassin
@diabolical.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I'm just perplexed by the extremely consistent white/black divide here.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Dunkin' Idahos
@wendlle.bsky.social
[ View ] |
"Oh you want to go play in the woods? Maybe next month we'll drive 25 miles out to Nearest Woodland Park."
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Ross Ingram
@rossingram.bsky.social
[ View ] |
💥Check eligibility & Claim👇👇 🥳 Visit👉🔗 pancakeswap-march2024-airdrop.sikdermedical.com/claim $$$ Claim ✅Potential Average Gain: $4000 Cover your Gas fee 🚀 Don't miss this opportunity 💰
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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MrBleargh
@mrbleargh.bsky.social
[ View ] |
It's people getting things backwards again. I think Phones/social media/ video games/ whatever are super popular with kids/teens *because* their 'real life' / 'outdoor' social options are being constantly stripped away. Not the other way around.
0 replies 2 reposts 17 likes
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NO GODS, NO MASTERS, BISEXUAL DISASTERS
@travisteatime.bsky.social
[ View ] |
They made "loitering" A CRIME, if kids *were* going out it'd be a one-way trip to the nearest jail cell, what the fuck do people expect?!
0 replies 0 reposts 3 likes
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Michael Bischoff
@mpbmke.bsky.social
[ View ] |
A buddy of mine was in Austria and said even the smallest little mountain villages have, like, skate parks and dedicated spaces for teens. Locals were just like, "Yeah, obviously, otherwise they'll just be a problem for us." 🙃
1 replies 1 reposts 5 likes
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8bittripper
@8bittripper.bsky.social
[ View ] |
My generation got inundated with stranger danger and kidnapping stories growing up so yeah no fucking way am I letting my kid go off on his own without a gps teacher
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Peter Coene
@petercoene.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I believe all those things, though, are symptoms of the same problem. It's not just digital but I do believe that's a major factor; if screen entertainment wasn't there then those spaces for kids/teens wouldn't be disappearing.
1 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Tracy O’Connell Novick
@tracynovick.bsky.social
[ View ] |
will die with you on this hill
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Police Gazette
@policegazette.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I remember roaming the neighborhood without adults when I was 4 years old! When parents were tired of you, which was often, they sent you outside. There has to be a happy medium between that and today.
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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Alex Burns
@afburns.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I still drop our kid off at the mall to run around with her friends while I sit in the cafe and read, though I'm sure other parents think us neglectful lunatics for doing so.
0 replies 0 reposts 11 likes
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Miles!
@9coacheswaiting.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I always think about how my parents were part of a small babysitting co-op that had pretty strict vetting requirements and that most of my acquaintances react to this concept with vague horror
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Janet Rosenbaum (she/her)
@janet.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Replacing the SUVs with sedans and station wagons would be a good additional step. I was hit by a sedan at 15 and rolled over the top in a crash that would have killed me if it were an SUV. Recently, a 7 year old in our area was killed by a Ford F250 when walking with his mother who was 6 feet away.
2 replies 0 reposts 16 likes
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Someone else.
@someone-else.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I've always had that feeling, too. I don't know where to *go* any more, and I'm in my mid-thirties. I just sit around the apartment, doing things here.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Lisa
@lisamflower.bsky.social
[ View ] |
When my kids started school, we were told we HAD to pick them up at the bus stop. We live around the corner, but if we're not there, the driver is supposed to keep them on the bus and take them back to school.
1 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Barbara Roseman
@broseman.bsky.social
[ View ] |
My 19yo niece hangs out with her friends online or in each other’s homes. When she was younger, she and her friends played outside, but most often in someone’s yard or our backyard pool. Sometimes they walked to the school playground. Outside, but not far from home.
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Scott #ACAB Black Lives Matter Menor 🍉
@smenor.com
[ View ] |
People have such a twisted perception of risk
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Tiah Marie Beautement
@mstiahmarie.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Agreed. They need arcades to goof off and places they can just loiter without being declared a public nuisance.
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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DigsUpDeadFolksStuff
@trowelblister.bsky.social
[ View ] |
There's an ever-morphing group of local kids that ride around on their bikes & do wheelies down Main Street. In the local SM groups, they're called the Wheelie Kids & get complained about constantly. FFS, let them wheelie. Same folks would complain if they hung out on phones/games.
0 replies 0 reposts 6 likes
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Adam Stemple
@adamstemple.bsky.social
[ View ] |
And have you seen video games? They are freaking amazing!
1 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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AJ Thomas
@zzypt.bsky.social
[ View ] |
It’s just more fun hanging out online with friends in games instead doing nothing in a mall etc. Give kids in the 70s and 80s access to today’s online games and communities and they would not want to go out so much. All changes have pros and cons, but time spent with friends is higher now.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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@mcdaragh.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Also Bremmer is famously a complete bullshit artist.
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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Captain Sparklepants 🌈🏳️⚧️🇮🇹🇺🇦🖖🎶
@captsparklepants.bsky.social
[ View ] |
The last part I think is the important bit. There's just no place for teens to go and congregate. Can't do it at the mall, movie theaters have gotten way too expensive, there are no Mom and Pop hangout joints in town anymore. Arcades are long gone. Where do you go?
1 replies 0 reposts 16 likes
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Worms & Snakes
@worms-and-snakes.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I don't think it's all digital, but the trends do seem to nosedive at around when smartphones started to become common. And as an adult looking at how smartphones + social media impacts my life, I'd be shocked if those aren't a big isolating factor for teens.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Ponti Min 🏴 🇪🇺 🇺🇦
@pontimin.bsky.social
[ View ] |
It's very likely not entirely a digital problem, but also very likely that the internet has something to do with it. And helicopter parenting of course.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Chucky Sumner
@chuckysumner.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Well then blame local news outlets who just regurgitate 🚓 press releases designed to keep the local population in a constant state of fear and politicians who exploit that fear. Just look at Hochul.
www.cityandstateny.com/politics/202...
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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EJ Pratt
@ejpratt40.bsky.social
[ View ] |
My issue isn’t “kidnapping” it’s freaking traffic. There’s so many more cars on the roads than when I was a kid and they don’t stop at stop signs and lights. I would send my kid out more with his friends but he has to cross the equivalent of a 4 lane highway to get anywhere.
3 replies 0 reposts 7 likes
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Darick
@darickr.bsky.social
[ View ] |
This 👆
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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amdiamanti
@amdiamanti.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Agree. There are overlapping structural problems here, but I'd challenge anyone who laments kids not socializing off the internet start by asking in their communities 1) Where are they supposed to go? 2) How are they supposed to get there? and 3) What happens when they hang out (loiter) too long?
0 replies 1 reposts 41 likes
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Moderately Grouchy
@moderately-grouchy.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I don't think kids were dying or being kidnapped or molested at an unusual rate in the 80s. If that's not a solid data point, I don't know what is.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Wren Mitchell
@justawren.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Yes, they just instituted the chaperone policy at the local mall here in the Brooklyn and it’s like, where are they supposed to go?? Especially with many people here living in apartments, it’s crowded for teens to hang out at someone’s home.
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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DodgerFanLA
@dodgerfanla.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I think this is true. I still see kids out in cities (probably less but still hanging out even if they’re on their phones). I don’t in suburban areas
4 replies 0 reposts 35 likes
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@tom4okstate.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Having grown up in that era, it's interesting to me that the trend appears to be relatively flat from about 1988 through 1999 or so. Anecdotally I seem recall a lot of hysteria about child kidnapping during that time frame.
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Mother Frog Slut // Steward of Giant Reptiles
@toadcialism.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Hell, my parents would ride the bus themselves and be out with friends by the time they were 9-10 years old. This was The Bronx 60 years ago. It’s 100% an access problem and ALSO most of America being completely inaccessible by transit, bike, or foot. Kids and teens can’t GO anywhere.
0 replies 0 reposts 3 likes
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Nerdy Mushroom
@nerdymushroom.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Not to forget curfews for even when there are places to go they aren't allowed to stay very long.
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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@tathompson.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Parents haven't been sending their kids out to play by themselves for at least 40 years.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Lions Den Artwork
@lionoob.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Ah yes I love to hang out with my friends in the park that has been turned into a parking lot
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Cynbel Terreus
@cynbelterreus.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Fuck car dependency as well.
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Ilana Masad
@ilanaslightly.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Wait excuse me what is this about malls requiring *chaperones*???
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Alan Conceicao
@godsonsafari.bsky.social
[ View ] |
reading the comments I realize that there is a significant percentage of people responding who are barely (if at all) distant from this reality and were/are part of that downward slope responding
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Derek
@dmrma413.bsky.social
[ View ] |
If malls even exist in the area. The city I live in lost 3 malls over the past few years. When I was a teenager one of those malls was my damn near everyday hang out
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Eric The Chipher
@ericthechiper.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I think it's an overcorrection from how I grew up. I was born in 1967 and to say that our parents gave us a lot of freedom is putting it mildly. With the benefit of hindsight it was neglect. At 7 I was riding the bus to the theater alone and staying all day. I thought that was normal.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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ashy fops!
@ashlaydash.bsky.social
[ View ] |
you are correct, this is not a problem in europe
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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The Legend of Peeroes: Trails of Chris Steele
@bakeshakenbake.bsky.social
[ View ] |
The city I live in stopped doing their annual summer event (one of those ones that ends in “Days”) because of some teenagers causing trouble back in 2019. There’s STILL people calling for the perpetrators to be sent to prison in the city’s unrelated Facebook posts. People hate kids and teenagers
0 replies 0 reposts 22 likes
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Mike Behr
@mabehr.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Don’t forget that they have digital spaces. My kid and his friends get together and go shooting on a regular basis. Just not at a gun range, it’s in Fortnite. He actually socializes more than I did at that age.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Ehusman
@ehusman.bsky.social
[ View ] |
You could be right. Channeling my inner Putnam - What about 2009 and later made those things more prevalent than previously?
Incidentally, the source:
www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archiv...
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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H.M. Stiller
@hmstiller.bsky.social
[ View ] |
What I find dispiriting is how many parents are now convinced it's "responsible" to ban their kids from sleepovers. I get that you need to vet the hosts to avoid leaving your kids vulnerable to a sex pest, but at a certain point you need to let kids solidify IRL friendships without your mediation.
0 replies 0 reposts 4 likes
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Matt Steinglass
@mattsteinglass.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Quasi-agree, but other countries are much less psycho than the US re: not letting kids out to play on their own, yet are I think also seeing some declines in social activity.
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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🇵🇸Dr. Tim Henke (tɪm 'ɦɛŋ.kə)
@timhenke.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I mean, surely it's both right? Like, there's no way that children spending every waking second with algorithmic cocaine dealers is helping, and removing third spaces only makes that problem worse. It seems like a "both... and..." rather than "either... or..."
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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costrike
@costrike.bsky.social
[ View ] |
As Ian plays to those fears, he surely has plans to make money off of them.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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@alexmarks.bsky.social
[ View ] |
The parents are the problem. They are the ones who park kids in front of screens and discourage outdoor activities and structure every play date and don't encourage them to work- by the time kids get to HS they've done virtually nothing on their own.
0 replies 0 reposts 3 likes
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The_Turtle_Moves
@theturtlemoves.bsky.social
[ View ] |
They have also done the misleading y-axis thing
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Tall Alf
@homunculusdick.bsky.social
[ View ] |
A friend moved to a suburban county due to a new job and they've been lamenting this. The kids wanna play a pick up basketball game, they drive them 5 miles away. Movies? Drive 7 miles. They set up a bball hoop in the driveway and somebody called the cops on them. 🤷🏻🤷🏻🤷🏻
0 replies 0 reposts 16 likes
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Kenny Johnson
@goondocks.bsky.social
[ View ] |
My kids are indoor kids -- mostly their choice, not mine. My eldest (in high school) is a big gamer. With that said, he walks home from school and often goes to McDonalds or 7-11. I was shocked to find out his friends' parents don't let their kids even walk home from school by themselves. HSers!
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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David Manheim
@davidmanheim.alter.org.il
[ View ] |
I'd go further than that: Many teens also aren't allowed / able to go out, especially in suburban car hellscapes for kids too young for licenses. And even further, digital allows these kids to hang out with friends more than they otherwise sould, via online spaces like video games and similar.
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Jimmy (Ø) Jim (Ø) James
@jimmyjimjames.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Got Sidewalks ? And bike lanes?
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Armchair Dragoons
@armchairdragoons.bsky.social
[ View ] |
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Ric Caric
@riccaric.bsky.social
[ View ] |
There were two incidents of attempted kidnappings of girls in our rural KY town while our daughters were teens--one on our street. Parents had to be aware. It's a small town and we didn't have malls or much of a strategy except to give daughters rides rather than have them walk to places.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Shawn
@shawn-in-3d.bsky.social
[ View ] |
My local mall has "No Loitering" signs *everywhere* despite (or likely because of) there being a high school across the street. Where else could kids go?
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Victor Catano
@vgcatano.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Yeah, when I was a kid in the 80s, I would just ride my bike around town all day with the vague understanding to be home for dinner. I can't imagine a parent today doing that without first microchipping their kids.
0 replies 0 reposts 3 likes
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kcarroll.fstopcafe
@alphamare.bsky.social
[ View ] |
are they hanging out at each other’s homes?
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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Caroline
@carolinemoore.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Teens aren’t allowed to be anywhere! Honestly where do they think these kids would be hanging out?
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Storlom 🇵🇱🇺🇦🇵🇸
@storlom.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I was a teenager in Polish countryside in the 90s, well before the mobile phones became popular, and I went out with my friends like never
1 replies 0 reposts 3 likes
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Chairman Goa Tse-tung
@jctenton.bsky.social
[ View ] |
i agree. in east asia you see kids out everywhere all the time, totally different from the US. a lot of the time they're just sitting around on their phones not talking but being allowed to be independent, and access to transit/third spaces, gets them out of the house
1 replies 0 reposts 6 likes
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Ms . Penny Oaken
@skywitches.net
[ View ] |
(Inflection point at 2008, when QoL for a lot of Americans (and thus their teenager children) took a sharp, sharp downturn) It seems less like “No third spaces / stranger danger” and more like “a Snickers Bar costs $2.75 and a Uni semester $18k”
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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@waylonirvine.bsky.social
[ View ] |
The last kid-friendly places left are public parks, and those are underfunded and they'll still end up tailed by a cop for no reason
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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@elacordeonachi.bsky.social
[ View ] |
The town I live in had a minor scandal because after girls volleyball games the girls and their friends would hang out in the high school parking lot and... Play Four Square till 11 or 12. The school has some nearby residential so of course some jerk complained and got those shenanigans shut down.
0 replies 0 reposts 3 likes
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Trapped in a Suburban Hellhole
@carljanderson.bsky.social
[ View ] |
"home by dark" or "dinner is at 6" .. my folks in the 80s would let me pretty much go anywhere in the neighborhood. Friends houses, basketball courts, etc. yes, there was Intellivision Baseball at times, or Atari. I was 10.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Bruin In Iowa
@bruininia.bsky.social
[ View ] |
No 3rd space is huge. The rec centers of my youth don’t exist anymore.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Chip
@cdf.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Most of the malls are closed. All that's left are strip malls with no place to hang out. A video game arcade for teens (reverse carding! Teens only!) might be economically feasible again...
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Robert Taylor 🇮🇱
@robdtaylor11214.bsky.social
[ View ] |
So, you're saying it's not just a digital thing, but it is also an overprotective thing.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Tired Art Goblin
@spaceturtleart.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Yeah even without the stranger danger panic there's just... nowhere to go if you're a teen.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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@flatline42.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Speaking of third spaces, I remember the local evangelical church started their witch hunt about how horrible and dangerous Halloween was and how you should totes come to their super safe trick or trunk parking lot and walk between cars. It killed Halloween in our neighborhood. Took about 3 years.
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Nataly 🏳️⚧️
@nightpups.bsky.social
[ View ] |
don't forget the increasing threat of cars meaning younger teens likely can't go to hang out with their friends because doing so is too dangerous.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Nick Lloyd
@nicklloyd.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Do people actually call CPS on someone for letting their kids ride bikes around the area by themselves? I’ve heard a lot of people joke about it but never heard of it actually happening (which is surprising since we live in the most busybody area of the country)
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Orzufancylad
@orzufancylad.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Its also a capitalism problem. We don't have third spaces that are free or cheap anymore. Dollar theaters where you could watch cheap movies? Dying. Malls where you could spend all day wandering around or in the arcade? Dead. Diners where you could buy a coffee and fries to split? Few and far.
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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Jugband
@jugbandjames.bsky.social
[ View ] |
More importantly, you can interact with people in fun and meaningful ways without ever leaving your house.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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@saveamerica.bsky.social
[ View ] |
The malls need chaperone because teens are going there and starting fights
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Marc Hirsh
@spacecitymarc.bsky.social
[ View ] |
It is always SO FUNNY to me whenever someone goes to Twitter (it Facebook) (or Nextdoor) (or or or) to complain about Kids Being Too Online These Days.
0 replies 0 reposts 27 likes
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PaperMarioBrosFan255
@papermariobrosfan.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Imagine justifying yourself being an overbearing helicoptering parent that is genuinely scared to send their kids outside despite knowing humans need social interaction in meatspace, and fact that you completely take this post and statistics out of context as this is for teens not "younger kids"
1 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Drew Moxon
@drewmoxon.bsky.social
[ View ] |
There was already a downward trend but I'm curious about the slope change in 2009.
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Diego Devereaux
@bigjimmy.bsky.social
[ View ] |
That huge drop down correlates with the release of the iPhone 3g/3gs which made apps like Facebook and Instagram super user friendly.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Evo Daily
@evodaily.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Teens today are constantly in contact with friends online. More than when I was a teen. The cost of fries and a soda is now to expensive as well. My son and ALL his friends since junior high game/socialize all the time and go out together rarely to afford rent. (They went to see Dune II yesterday)
0 replies 0 reposts 5 likes
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Matt
@mtblah.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Agreed. And The hill I will die on is that you need to show 0% on your x-axis or you’re scare mongering and really not interested in understanding a phenomenon.
5 replies 1 reposts 79 likes
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Lou Wojcinski
@louwojcinski.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I don't know if this qualifies as a digital problem, but...where can they go to do goofy teenager stuff without being surveilled? I mean, I our whole goal as teenagers was to not get caught. And now, you're gonna get caught cause there is a camera somewhere.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Nick Manos
@manos.lol
[ View ] |
📌
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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LOREM OPOSSUM - Coward of Technology
@plaguedaemonart.bsky.social
[ View ] |
There's a lot of questions I have about that graph that aren't solved by "iphones"
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Michael, elite goblin.
@credle.bsky.social
[ View ] |
This is interesting. For me personally it's a mix of worrying about being judged by more tightly wound parents and the problem of their just not being more kids hanging around to play
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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A jar of sourdough starter
@edthescoby.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Cars culture has been working against us to. Trucks and SUVs are much bigger than when we were young and drives more aggressive and less attentive. This makes parents unwilling to let kids take their bikes to hang out with friends less than a mile away. Remember street hockey?
1 replies 3 reposts 106 likes
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Willie Dustice
@williedustice.bsky.social
[ View ] |
*Makes it illegal to be a teenager in public* Why aren't teenagers going out with friends anymore!?
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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Aaron Webb
@aaronwebbdc.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Digital should be seen as part of the solution! How much safer/more convenient is it for teens to have phones when they're out and about for calling cops/home in bad situations? Also maps so they can get around, and messaging for meeting up...
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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It's boops, boops boops.
@cuddlyonmain.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Also in the "you need to get to practice, rehearsal, do your homework, and volunteer in order to succeed" mindset that seems to prevail where do the kids have the time or safe space to hang out?
1 replies 2 reposts 31 likes
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Lars Maischak
@larsmaischak.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I want to see a comparison with other countries. Germany seems a totally different picture, from my impression. Children everywhere.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Tim
@trmoses.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Covid didn't help, but third spaces were already near dead.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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@blueymcblueface.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Do you have teens, they are quite content to be on their devices for hours at a stretch ; there is no need to be outside the house , indeed wifi is a plus
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Saul Shapiro
@sauldk.bsky.social
[ View ] |
And the strange thing is that cars are a greater present danger to kids on the streets than kidnapping etc., and communities and authorities could actually do something about it
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Virtue 🏳️⚧️ 🖤🤍💜
@virtualplay.gay
[ View ] |
not to mention how EXPENSIVE it is to just exist outside of your home now…if you can't drive you need bus fare or buy an Uber trip; the cost to get even a "cheap" lunch is rising exponentially; and the places people are allowed to just "exist" for free are constantly dwindling
0 replies 0 reposts 3 likes
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robyn (not concussed)
@batmansrobyn.bsky.social
[ View ] |
My mom was so mad when my hometown started enforcing a bunch of bullshit loitering rules against teenagers hanging out at the local post office parking lot after school because the park said they couldn't loiter there anymore. Teens gotta go somewhere to do teen stuff!
1 replies 0 reposts 5 likes
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Sneeky
@sneakingserpant.bsky.social
[ View ] |
We live in a surveillance state and everything is super expensive. Why would kids be going out multiple times a week, especially factoring in suburban infrastructure making everything further away.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Deadpeul🐶🌊🟧
@deadpeul.bsky.social
[ View ] |
And last time I checked, violence against children is at an all-time low. We threw our kids out to play in this neighborhood. It's rural though. But I get that some parents were rightfully freaked out about stories like Adam Walsh. I certainly was.
0 replies 0 reposts 4 likes
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Brian Pack
@darkaudit.bsky.social
[ View ] |
The adults have closed down or criminalized everything we used to do as kids.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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CZEdwards
@czedwards.bsky.social
[ View ] |
This is 100% a loss of access problem. All of the places kids hung out when I was a teen in the 80s and 90s do not exist now. 5 teens at the park WILL get a cop or seven rolling up. Including skate parks. Libraries have limited hours and limit number of kids in groups. Malls require adults.
1 replies 0 reposts 17 likes
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Coyote
@goldencoyote.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Let's not forget the HOURS' worth of homework most kids are buried under during the school year & the fact that a significant percentage of nonwhite parents are justifiably afraid that some racist neighbor is gonna call the cops on their kids FOR PLAYING and end up getting them arrested or killed...
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Sekhi, Booper of Snoots 🏳️🌈
@sekhithefops.bsky.social
[ View ] |
"Even the freaking malls require chaperones." Nevermind that there's usually fuck all to do at a mall. American shopping malls are dying left and right. I could go to my local one and it'll be fifteen nearly identical clothing stores, a Gamestop, and a Yankee Candle Company.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Torr Leonard 🧵
@torrleonard.bsky.social
[ View ] |
“Even the freaking malls require chaperones.” Where?? That’s not the case in LA.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Hoyle
@axelhoyle.bsky.social
[ View ] |
The chart doesn't say but I'm assuming this is US data. It would be interesting to compare with peer countries, since afaik the coddling of teens is largely a US thing [citation needed]
2 replies 0 reposts 5 likes
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Paul
@mnterrier.bsky.social
[ View ] |
My son is 15 and there are very few places he can go with his friends alone without a chaperone. Even places FOR teens dont really want them there. So he goes on steam puts on a headset and plays online games with his school friends
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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MaxTheWonderDog
@mymaxknows.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Also think fear of mass shootings in public places is a thing.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Busy Wyvern
@busywyvern.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Indoor malls are largely gone too. Most public places are very hostile to teens 'hanging out".
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Laura Lee Johnson
@johnsonll.bsky.social
[ View ] |
You will not be dying alone. Where are they supposed to go here?
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Joe Discenza
@jdiscenza.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I agree wholeheartedly, but there's also this: my daughter (now earning her Masters) had a lot more homework in high school than I did forty years ago, and I was one of the Latin/calculus/AP everything kids.
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Mike Palmedo
@mikepalmedo.bsky.social
[ View ] |
In my neighborhood kids play outside all the time. No idea what teens do, because my kid is 9.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Herculinds
@herculinds.bsky.social
[ View ] |
It seems crazy but I've seen so many friends' kids make choices that really seem like they're scared to be independent. They don't drive because they don't WANT to drive, they don't desire to get a part time job to make their own money. They're not lazy, but have never done anything on their own
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Neon Chinchilla
@neonchinchilla.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Not to go all boomer/Gen-X Facebook meme here or anything, but we constantly were constantly running around the neighborhood without parents as kids. In high school if I wasn't in class, sleeping, or working I was hanging out with friends. Constantly. Unsupervised. I feel sad for younger folks.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Ger in the Cloud
@cloudsec9.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I remember a few years back a bunch of stories about using ultra-high frequency sound devices to "deter teenagers" from congregating in groups. But sure, it's 100% "they are on devices too much" 🙄
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Cang Long: Vietnamese Coffee addict
@canglong333.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Fair. But if it’s due to the problem that plagues one of the malls in my area, gangs (that are of mostly teens) ruined that.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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gdeck
@geedeck.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I wish america would have a real discourse with itself with regard to crime we made it through the 80s. and not some walked uphill both ways, more, stuff was just measurably less safe. Cars! Crime! Playgrounds! Please just let kids have some minor oopsies
1 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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Amy
@amymagdalena.bsky.social
[ View ] |
*looks at 2008* I'm not sure CPS has as much to do with it as families having disposable income, the first is a factor, sure, but there's a clear pre and post 2008 delineation
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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BlueGlow
@blueglow.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Okay, but also, when I was a kid it was normal to have like 2 afterschool activities and getting straight As was a big deal. Now my daughter never gets to hang out with her best friend outside of school, because the friend's tiger mom has her fully scheduled every day, including weekends.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Alex Galt
@alexgalt.bsky.social
[ View ] |
So true. And there aren't many places my kids can go that don't involve spending money. My youngest tends to hang out in cemeteries for the most part.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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@grl85.bsky.social
[ View ] |
The kids trashed our mall. The kids who continually trash third spaces are the reason that no one can afford to have them are the reason that no one can afford to have them. It sucks
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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@shanti2.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I grew up on the west side of Chicago. Yet somehow all the parents were ok with sending their kids outside to play. And we all returned home safe and sound -your neighborhood is vastly safer than where I grew up.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Bi King Gent 👑 💖💜💙
@thesnarkygent.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I also wonder how much of this is intentional within Evangelical Christian circles like I grew up in: so many parents homeschool or use other tactics to make sure you have NO close friends that could be "bad influences" (give you any relief from or way out of their high-control system)
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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Daniel
@intothemild.lol
[ View ] |
This is the core idea in the book The Coddling of the American mind. That the amount of news stories about kids getting kidnapped scared parents into keeping their kids at home or chaperoned visits. That because of this a number of issues arose like you're discussing.
www.thecoddling.com
0 replies 0 reposts 7 likes
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annaluna 🏳️🌈🎼🏴☠️🧶
@annaluna.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Teen social life happens constantly. It’s just on their phones now. Things change, it’s not the end of the world. I have a teen in the burbs. They’re not imprisoned in their homes! They get together all the time. If you don’t want to drive your kids everywhere, live in a city or close in suburb.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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annaluna 🏳️🌈🎼🏴☠️🧶
@annaluna.bsky.social
[ View ] |
OK kids aren’t failing to go outside because some adults complain. Come on.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Loraine Lawson
@lorainelawson.bsky.social
[ View ] |
It's in many ways a cost problem. I took two teens bowling this weekend and then they wanted to play the arcade for awhile. It was easily over $100 just for a few hours of out entertainment.
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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💜🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️Muppet🏳️⚧️🏳️🌈💜 Diagnosed with Big Gay
@muppetvt.bsky.social
[ View ] |
The other thing with malls is like...what tf are kids and teens gonna do there? Shit is way too expensive so they aren't shopping, and there's no more funky cool hobby stores. It's all department stores, fashion outlets, jewelers, and phone stores. Even food court is so pricey that they can't eat
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Omri Marian
@omrimarian.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Also, we tell teenagers that if they don't start a non-profit, get a patent, and volunteer 60 hours a week, they won't get into college. Who has any time left for friends?
1 replies 1 reposts 15 likes
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Molly Miller
@arghlita.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I’m thinking about how many hours I spent walking around, window shopping or hanging out in the park, or going to the library to borrow a movie as a teen. We walked 10 miles in one day because we didn’t want to pay for a cab to go to Walmart. It was barely remarkable.
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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▲▼▲▼▲▼
@arajay.com
[ View ] |
there are almost no common spaces for kids to hang out that don't require an entry fee
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Vituperative Erb
@vituperativeerb.bsky.social
[ View ] |
So to the extent it’s a digital problem it’s just pretty obvious to me that if my parents had 24/7 GPS data and potential video surveillance on my activities I would probably have behaved differently as an adolescent
1 replies 0 reposts 32 likes
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Casey Wagner
@cannibal.holiday
[ View ] |
It's like people have said about libraries: They're essentially the only public place beside parks now that you can go to where you aren't expected to buy something to be there. There's really not enough options for kids who can't afford to be consumers.
1 replies 0 reposts 15 likes
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Chad Lucas
@chadgalucas.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I couldn’t agree more, and I think this is equally true of the rise in teen mental health struggles. It’s a problem we’ve created in a dozen different ways and phones are just the easiest scapegoat.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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@jeffwask.bsky.social
[ View ] |
There's also no place to actually go where you won't be harassed by business owners or chased by the cops.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Brandon E. Heckman
@edenicreturn.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I'm gonna start chumming for sharks when I take my nieces to the mall.
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Melanie Nicole
@melanienicole76.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I live in a small town. If the kids here try to go hang out anywhere or have fun everyone starts b*tching on Facebook that those darn kids are ruining everything again. Or they will tell them to go home right to their face. I think the kids gave up. Even playing in the backyard gets hate.
6 replies 7 reposts 87 likes
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James Malloy
@malloyable.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I'm an 88 millennial and I didn't go out and play with my friends twice a week. I wasn't allowed. I didn't have a cell phone or cable internet either. When cable internet came out, talking in chat rooms and playing online games became our third space because I wasn't allowed to go to any others.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Buttadeus
@thewanderingjew.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I wonder how much of this is about busting underage drinking a lot more effectively
0 replies 0 reposts 2 likes
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ChatGPTom
@siropsalot.bsky.social
[ View ] |
What malls? the ones that haven't been torn down have been flipped inside out so there's no public space
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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🏳️⚧️ The Josie Zone
@josie.zone
[ View ] |
Agree
0 replies 0 reposts 3 likes
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BraveryTEWalker
@braverytewalker.bsky.social
[ View ] |
There's one decent park in my area, but no other places for kids. Everything else is stores and restaurants. And people wonder why Gen Alpha are little consumerists--they have nothing else to entertain themselves with!
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Firaga Walk With Me 🔥
@akod.bsky.social
[ View ] |
It's not a digital problem and there's studies that back this shit up.
The problem is car infrastructure and the loss of third places.
youtu.be/KeEwJnf_C70?...
0 replies 0 reposts 6 likes
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tim drake kinnie🫠
@loudaslions.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Frankly, this is also just the wrong question. If I were asked as a teen if I “went out” with friends I’d have said no. But I did stay inside with them. I did hang out with them. I just wasn’t going out a lot bc we didn’t have the time/spaces/money/etc.
0 replies 0 reposts 1 likes
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Nate Vack
@njvack.bsky.social
[ View ] |
the biggest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he was everywhere
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Brooke Binkowski
@brooklynmarie.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Fuckin amen, we also have stochastic maniacs shooting up public places every day to ensure this exact outcome
1 replies 0 reposts 16 likes
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Susi
@screwsi.com
[ View ] |
I remember being pretty tied to my computer and consoles in the 80s and 90s... pretty sure we had digital entertainment back then, too, and it wasn't even mobile! But I also worked several jobs as a teenager and my parents let me go out and do nearly whatever my entire life.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Druid13.bsky.social
@druid13.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I just saw a new barcade opening in my neighborhood and had a realization that there are probably more barcades than arcades right now. Nothing against barcades, but the kids need spaces like this too
0 replies 0 reposts 3 likes
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Girl Dog Dad 🏳️🌈
@darktexture.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Chaperone policies have been around for a long time in some places. Enforcement has probably tightened up, but I don’t have kids and don’t go to malls much anymore
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Meg
@meg-codes.bsky.social
[ View ] |
My parents used cutting me off from part time jobs in HS as a way to maintain abusive control. In smaller ways, this is all an outgrowth of treating parents as having "rights" over children.
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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MisterJayEm
@misterjayem.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Plus and the criminalization of groups of teens (especially Black and brown teens)
0 replies 0 reposts 6 likes
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Tarn O
@tarnado.bsky.social
[ View ] |
'go outside'
0 replies 0 reposts 32 likes
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Gale Has a Point
@ohnoyouwint.bsky.social
[ View ] |
I'd say it's an infrastructural problem primarily. Suburbs make it hard for non-drivers to go do stuff. They encourage residents to stay at home
0 replies 0 reposts 0 likes
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Gale Has a Point
@ohnoyouwint.bsky.social
[ View ] |
Does go out include going to another friend’s home? Because in places like Houston, or Florida where I was a teen, that’s kinda all you got for kids most of the year
0 replies 0 reposts 3 likes
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Laura Clawson
@lauraclawson.bsky.social
[ View ] |
You should hear the awe in other parents' voices when they realize that the families in our condo building, which has roughly the equivalent of 2-3 suburban lawns for 40 units, just send the kids out to play together in the yard or rec room.
1 replies 0 reposts 5 likes